JS viroids are here in their 28th outing complete with exploding belly buttons. There's royal foofs and jiffy bag gifts, but most certainly NOT x-rated colouring books at the VAGINA party HQ!

[ChatEnOeuf]

Welcome, welcome, welcome to the 28th grads thread... celebrating the success of Just Shagging in getting us viroids upduffed!

For those that don't know, a 'viroid' is from the original JSing thread 1, where someone was trying to type ladies (in reference to all the JSing ladies), but their phone decided to call us all viroids instead!

The name stuck and we've been the JSing viroids ever since.

The thread we have graduated from is here in its 46th outing. WARNING: they're all a bit kerazy not to mention randy!

There is also a Just Mumming thread in postnatal clubs here for once your babies come along, or to keep up with the graduated graduates!

There is also a private facebook group (so it doesn't give the game away in your news feed!)... if you want to join to see photos of new babies etc, just ask in-thread!

Here is the stats list, please update your own spot with any updates: docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1oLJqpadAb2givKYq8OJfGCti3s6xzsTGlI-GoaBfM_M/edit?pli=1#gid=0

Hurray for DM arriving mini, and don't beat yourself up about bf, you've been through a lot!

Well you'd be able to see if you are toning up your pelvic floor gaggia, I think it's great if you're not sure you're doing it properly, with this you have a gauge and you can see the needle move when you tense.

To begin with I was a bit about the idea too, but now I think if you're prepared to do perineal massage then it's really not that different, this is just a posh version with some statistics behind it to show proper use will decrease the episiotomy and tear rate of women in childbirth! Plus they say the confidence you get by knowing you can push out a large object can really help with second stage too. I'll do anything to avoid a tear!!

The fanny balloon sounds good, but um, is it properly washable? I wouldn't want to be using the same balloon for months, knowing my house it'll have dog hair and Ready Brek on it by week two. Is it sterilisable? I do want to avoid a tear but also I'm just keen to see what my fanjo is capable of. We should get competitive and do a fanjolympics. How much does it cost Indigo?

This conversation is worse than the video they made me watch at a waterbirth lesson last week!

Fanjolympics! ha ha ha ha aha hahaaaaa!

Can we have one event aiming to see how far you can 'pop out' your child across the delivery room? Bit like Thai shows with ping pong balls

Waaaaaaaaaaaa! To the fanjolympics!
I can soooooo win that game. I shared on a thread here many years ago about how I sneezed a tampon out of my pyjama bottoms leg once.
Was it la who had to give birth to a banana? We are already winnersm

Errr....I may have missed it (totally have head in the clouds this week) but has anyone had an update from Tori?

Welcome Feather! Tis a home from home here, we're all just as mad as the undergrads

Nothing from Tori for a while.

Fanjolympics needs to go in the next fred title

Fanjolympics! You lot are brilliant.

I know Tori IRL - all is well and baby here, so don't worry. I'm sure she'll come and update you all properly with the details :)

Mini I'm amazed you managed to get any breastmilk into MicroMini, given what you've been through! Don't you dare feel bad.

Can't do the spinning baby stuff with possible placental concerns and tbh I'm not sure how much I believe in that kind of stuff. I think my wonky uterus is largely to blame. DD was transverse until 33-34w, and this baby isn't that big yet, even though I'm further along.

Welcome feather, sorry I missed you earlier!

Can we have a 'most waters' competition in these olympics? Just heard about it from a friend at lunch who said she was surprised how much there was of it.

Oh Chat I'm so pleased for her! Give her our congrats if you speak to her first and tell her we want to hear all about it!

Off to look up spinning babies!

I spose while we're in the fanny arena, anyone else got foof-ache? Like a dull ache? Not the same as kicked in the crotch pain. I'm assuming it's where baby is leaning on the exit? I am super shuffly today, everything is uncomfortable.

Hi feather!

I do my own no-mans-land massage, I think it's deeply unsexy, Mr tee thinks it's prequel to a fingerbang and blowjob/shag and when I think about WHY I'm doing it the last thing I want is his equipment near me. :( I'm happy with my pelvic floor, but I think my perineum is a bit unstretchy still. Hopefully I've got time to sort it! Although my mum just rang to say she's off on holiday sun-thurs next week, and could I ask her grandson to stay put. I said it's her own fault if she invokes the law of sod :) (I'm okay with it, as long as I can go to this weekends airshow first)...

Oooh that's fantastic to hear minitori is here - I did wonder if he might have arrived last night, as she had gone quiet.

Ideas for fanjolympics:

Baby shot put
Fastest labour
Long distance champ - longest labour (perhaps that's the booby prize?)
Hurdles - person with highest number of different birthing techniques you can fit into one labour
Weight lifting - heaviest baby
Swimming champ - for anyone who has a water birth
Archery - for anyone whose dh (or perhaps midwife?) is being a proper PITA during labour
Trampoline - adapted somehow for bouncing on birthing ball
Gymnastics artistic - self-explanatory, for the bendier viroids

OK so during my highly dissatisfying midwife conversation yesterday I brought up the whole strep B question. She proceeded to roll her eyes and tell me that 4000 babies are born a year at the hospital and probably 2 ladies have had strep b test in the whole time she's been there, plus if I test positive then I will have to have 4g of penicillin pumped into me during labour which is an awful lot 'but she will leave me to make up my own mind'. i.e. 'you're a fanny if you go ahead with it'.

Opinions?

I hate to say this tee but as before hasn't been on for a while I think you're next....

Yep it's washable, you wash it with soap and water after each use and air dry. You can also use the alcohol wipes on it. It's made from medical grade silicon

Also rhiannon it's about £90. Not cheap! But how can I put a price on a hopefully intact perineum?! I'd rather spend the money on that than things I don't really need for the baby, like more cute stuff or things she won't actually need for months. I will save some money aswell by renting and not buying a co sleeper, which I was initially planning to do.

I know la although I'm sure I saw before posting on one of the pregnancy boards a couple of nights ago, think she is a week ahead of me? In could completely cop out and alter my DD to the latest one I was given of the three, but that only buys me an extra 5 days. And really, he's not going to turn up to schedule. I am super impatient to meet him, it's just the squeezy out bit I'm a bit about, esp after thinking I'd have induction date by now. Just not a fan of the unknown not a control freak, no no Maybe next week.. In the meantime nip twiddling, shagging and ball bouncing!

Ok La, several things...

The risks are here and here and it basically says that even if you have GBS then your baby isn't necessarily going to get it too, just that the risk is higher, particularly if your waters go 18 hours before your labour starts (read that as 24, believe guidelines have been since updated).

To be honest, if it were me I'd campaign to have the test, but not necessarily pump myself full of penicillin during labour. I think you can do something about it prior to labour, but that it's v.easy to contract again, so no point treating before 32w or something. If you have the test you'd know that you were at increased risk of early onset of labour, and know that your waters going prior to labour starting were a greater risk factor than usual.

That is just me, though!

Me, I'd test (they do here as routine). Yes it's an annoying infection that comes and goes. Yes, not all women who have it would pass it on to their babies. But I'm scarred from seeing a baby sent home, well, at 6hrs post delivery, pitching up to A&E at 12 hours of age 'a bit off colour' - he was at death's door an hour later - bloody miracle he survived. Only takes one.

Oh Chat that must have been horrible. How awful for the parents Out of interest, if you remember it well, was it discovered how it was contracted...i.e. did the waters break far in advance or did she go into labour prematurely or anything?

Well if the consultant tries to tell me I can't have my ELCS I'll just show her this Fred!
That fanny balloon sounds awesome! I could've really done with that in all honesty. If I have an ELCS I won't be able to compete in most of the fanjolympics.
Can we also have worst song to be born to (DD was born to Queen- I want to ride my bicycle )

You know tori IRL chat?! Did we know this?! Please she is well though. Can't wait for details!

Oh and La I forgot the whole point of my GBS rant...if you are tested and diagnosed you don't 'have' to do anything. The consent lies with you!

LOVING the idea of worst song to be born to, Pixie! Possibly "I'm coming out, I want the world to know..."?

One of those I'll never forget, Lemon. Not tested antenatally, not preterm (would negate a 6hr discharge), can't recall how long waters had gone for, but wouldn't have been over 24 hours - simply unaware...

Oh Chat

Do you think everyone should push for testing as a matter of course?