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Funeral songs etc needed for our baby

124 replies

TwittleBee · 05/07/2019 09:28

Our beautiful baby boy died at 5 days old yesterday we are completely lost.

This is actually DH's first funeral and today also marks the due date of our other baby who I MMC end of last year.

We have a 2 year old son; I was considering using songs that he likes but DH said he doesn't want DS to associate his favourite things with grief.

Also what else do we need to consider? We will be contacting a funeral director today.

OP posts:
newmomof1 · 05/07/2019 19:08

I am so, so sorry.

Let me go - Gary Barlow x

Ellieboolou27 · 05/07/2019 19:08

@TwittleBee I just realised you had responded about my mum, bless you to take the time to reach out whilst going through your own terrible grief.

It's 9 years on since I lost my son (6 months old). It takes a long time to heal, but I promise you will and I also found a lot of comfort with the website Sands.

Youcouldbemysilversprings · 05/07/2019 19:13

I'm so sorry, this is heartbreaking Flowers can I suggest 'fallen embers' by Enya, it's beautiful xx

Youcouldbemysilversprings · 05/07/2019 19:15

Once, as my heart remembers,
All the stars were fallen embers.
Once, when night seemed forever
I was with you.
Once, in the care of morning
In the air was all belonging.
Once, when that day was dawning
I was with you.
How far we are from morning,
How far we are
And the stars shining through the darkness,
Falling in the air.
Once, as the night was leaving
Into us our dreams were weaving.
Once, all dreams were worth keeping.
I was with you.
Once, when our hearts were singing,
I was with you
😢

Robs20 · 05/07/2019 19:16

My first post on MN but I felt I had to write. I was in your position in February (my daughter was 1 when she died).
We had Ellie Goulding - how long will I love you and Christina Perri - a thousand year whilst we played a slideshow of photos. We had Eva Cassidy - fields of gold at the start/ end.
We also had a cremation but chose to have the bit where the coffin is lowered at the start, just DH and I at the start instead.
If you are looking for a funeral director, the coop will do everything for free and were very caring. I’m so sorry for your loss xx

NellWilsonsWhiteHair · 05/07/2019 19:18

I’m so sorry for your loss.

Arvo Part - Spiegel im Spiegel?

youllhavehadyourtea · 05/07/2019 19:19

I am so sorry.

Dream a Little Dream of Me
Mamas and Papas

Sweetooth92 · 05/07/2019 19:20

Not a song but can I recommend Debi giloris no matter what. Beautiful book lovely meaning and very fitting
We had it at our wedding but perfectly fitting for a funeral.

"Small was feeling grim and dark. He was playing toss and fling and bang and crash. Break and snap and bash and batter. Small said “I’m a grim and grumpy little small and nobody loves me at all”. “Oh Small,” said Large. “Grumpy or not, I’ll always love you no matter what.”

Small said, “If I was a grizzly bear would you still love me would you still care?” “Of course,” said Large “bear or not, I’ll always love you no matter what.”

Small said “But if I turned into a bug, would you still love me and give me a hug?” “Of course,” said Large “bug or not, I’ll always love you no matter what.”

“No matter what?” said Small, and smiled, “What if I was a crocodile?” Large said “I’d hug you close and hold you tight and tuck you up in bed at night”.

“Does love wear out” said Small, “does it break or bend? Can you fix it, stick it, does it mend?” “Oh help,” said Large “I’m not that clever I just know I’ll love you forever”.

Small said “but what about when you’re dead and gone, would you love me then, does love go on?” Large held Small snug as they looked out at the night, at the moon in the dark and the stars shining bright. “Small look at the stars – how they shine and glow, but some of those stars died a long time ago. Still they shine in the evening skies. Love, like starlight, never dies”.

Sweetooth92 · 05/07/2019 19:20

& I am so very sorry for your loss ❤️

Alb1 · 05/07/2019 19:21

We had Bob Marley three little birds, we used to sing it to our older DS when he was a baby and we wanted something that wasn’t always just ‘sad’ (our other song was more typically sad, they are beautiful songs, we just wanted a mix).

So sorry about your baby Flowers I can barely remember those first few weeks now but I no they were especially awful, be kind to yourselves

mrswarthog · 05/07/2019 19:21

@TwittleBee, I'm so sorry for the loss of your boy & your hard year. Flowers Your dad'll look after him.

AllFourOfThem · 05/07/2019 19:21

I’m so sorry. One piece of advice I was given was to avoid any song that you might ever hear on the radio or out in public in case it catches you unaware.

We had Winter Bear by Coby Grant.

whatwouldbigfatfannydo · 05/07/2019 19:23

So sorry for your loss. There are just no words. Flowers

Last year, I attended the funeral of a friend's baby dd who passed at 7 days old. Also a simple cremation service.

They had lovely versions of lullabies playing (Baby mine from Dumbo and Lavender's Blue and a dream is a wish your heart makes from Cinderella are all beautiful). It was so fitting and meant the service was truly about the baby.

Mammalian · 05/07/2019 19:25

I'm so sorry. There are no words to understand the pain you must be going through.
Some songs...
True Colours (Cindy Lauper)
Your song (Elton John)
Kissing you (Desiree)

TransFannyUltrasound · 05/07/2019 19:26

Oh my goodness, I am so sorry.

Whisky2014 · 05/07/2019 19:27

Within temptation - our farewell.

So sorry again, twittle Flowers

Whisky2014 · 05/07/2019 19:29

They had lovely versions of lullabies playing (Baby mine from Dumbo and Lavender's Blue and a dream is a wish your heart makes from Cinderella are all beautiful). It was so fitting and meant the service was truly about the baby.
That sounds nice

newnewname19 · 05/07/2019 19:44

I'm so sorry OP, I hope you are being well looked after and I'll say a little prayer for you tonight xxx

RageAgainstTheVendingMachine · 05/07/2019 19:44

This was a life that had hardly begun
No time to find your place in the Sun
No time to do all you could have done
But we loved you enough for a lifetime

No time to enjoy the world and its wealth
No time to take life down off the shelf
No time to sing the songs of yourself
Though you had enough love for a lifetime

Those who live long endure sadness and tears
But you'll never suffer the sorrowing years
No betrayal, no anger, no hatred, no fears
Just love - Only love - In your lifetime.

kunderscorej · 05/07/2019 19:49

So sorry for your loss

ilikepurple · 05/07/2019 19:50

I am so very sorry for your loss. Fly I think it's called by Celine Dion.

ilikepurple · 05/07/2019 19:51

The lyrics are

Lyrics

Fly, fly little wing
Fly beyond imagining
The softest cloud, the whitest dove
Upon the wind of heaven's love
Past the planets and the stars
Leave this lonely world of ours
Escape the sorrow and the pain
And fly again
Fly, fly precious one
Your endless journey has begun
Take your gentle happiness
Far too beautiful for this
Cross over to the other shore
There is peace forevermore
But hold this memory bittersweet
Until we meet
Fly, fly do not fear
Don't waste a breath, don't shed a tear
Your heart is pure, your soul is free
Be on your way, don't wait for me
Above the universe you'll climb
On beyond the hands of time
The moon will rise, the sun will set
But I won't forget
Fly, fly little wing
Fly where only angels sing
Fly away, the time is right
Go now, find the light

salsmum · 05/07/2019 19:53

Heaven needed you more is a song about the loss of a child. So very sorry to hear of your little ones passing. ❤️❤️

ilikepurple · 05/07/2019 19:54

Reading idea

Little Snowdrop by Author Unknown

"The world may never notice If a Snowdrop doesn't bloom,

Or even pause to wonder If the petals fall too soon.

But every life that ever forms,
Or ever comes to be,
Touches the world in some small way
For all eternity.
The little one we longed for
Was swiftly here and gone.
But the love that was then planted Is a light that still shines on.
And though our arms are empty,
Our hearts know what to do.
For every beating of our hearts
Says that we love you

mmmmbopp · 05/07/2019 19:56

Lullabye (Goodnight, My Angel) - Billy Joel

@TwittleBee I'm on the Sept baby thread and cried after reading your post, and have thought about you a lot. You have the support and love of every single person on MN xxxx