Parents selling car to my DS

[marvelousmarmaladian]

Trying to work out if IABU to think my parents should sell their car to my DS. He needs a car, they have a car. Both are unable to drive. It is basically rusting away at my sisters house. My DS made an offer. My sister tells me they are thinking about it. Which is weird as my DM doesn't know where she is and DF can't talk properly. What would you do?

If you think your parents don’t have the capacity to think over an offer, why did your son make one? If they don’t have capacity, they cannot actually sell their car - it would be your son taking it for whatever he wants.

Your parents don’t have capacity so you just want to take from them?

ooh its a bit Icky & lacking in morals trying to take advantage of your parents like that.

Why is your son making an offer to people without capacity in the first place? Just go buy a car elsewhere. Awful behaviour.

I agree with pp if they dont have capacity how can they sell him the car?

@marvelousmarmaladian just ask to borrow it for a while instead - they may feel uncomfortable selling to family.

But they don’t have capacity to consent to that.

Your DF may not be able to talk properly but can he still communicate?
You don't mention him "not knowing where he is" and someone can still be able to have consent for a decision even if their speech is poor.
If one or other is able to give consent, I think the car should be appropriately valued so your son will know what to pay.
You may even find that, if consent can be given, your parents may knock a bit off the proper price.

my DM doesn't know where she is and DF can't talk properly

Do they have LPAs in place?

I hope so.
@marvelousmarmaladian You're coming across as quite grabby.
I hope I'm wrong.

Just borrow it then.

You are suggesting theft. Not something I’d be comfortable with.

As in "take without proper consent"?
Perhaps they might have a spare bit of cash lying around that could be "borrowed" too.

Eta X-posted with McSpoot
Slow typist, me

It’s not theft, it’s borrowing and keeping it ticking over. I’m pretty sure, if the family are a loving and supportive family, that the GPs wouldn’t mind helping their GS out when asked, especially in this situation when they are not even using the car.

Not being able to speak properly doesn’t mean he doesn’t have capacity.
Do you know who has POA financial IF they are unable to make day to day decisions.
In which case the POA financial can decide on their behalf about the sale.
If indeed sitting rotting away, the purchase price should reflect what it would be worth (much less) upon their passing (possibly even a cost to the estate to remove it).

It is amazing how people try and justify using other people's things, what i would do op is leave them to do what they want same with holiday homes and anything else

If it is not yours it is not yours

PollyBell

It is amazing how people try and justify using other people's things

Yes. Seems to be an attempt to reframe it as helping the GPs out by keeping it "ticking over".

OP, it's not even clear there's a problem at the moment. You've been told that your parents are thinking your son's offer over.
If one or both has capacity, they may accept and all will be fine.
If they don't have capacity - which you seem to be implying, though that's not clear - hopefully there's a POA in place.
It might a bit complicated if they really don't have capacity for this decision and there's no POA.

Or are you suspicious of your sister's motives?

You ask what posters here would do. Personally, I would act within the law with no dodgy "borrowing".

I read this as OP meaning that her parents aren't thinking it over - because her DM hasn't got capacity and her DF won't be discussing it with anyone. So she presumably thinks it's her sister doing the thinking over with the implication it's not her sister's place to make the call.

Not sure i agree her DF couldn't be thinking it over, though.

O I would go and see your DF and communicate with him directly, see what he is thinking, if he wants to accept, counter your DS's offer, get some more information to make the decision, or just keep the car.

Okay. Let a good car go to rust and spend a fortune on buying another. That makes sense!

Impossible to communicate in any meanigful way with either of my parents. My sister and I have equal POA but neither of us has enacted it yet. I'm not grabby. My sister has taken from my parents for decades as I was living a distance away and she was using them for a place to stay and free childcare, school events and dropoffs ; helping for hours a week with her side hustle etc. Believe me they have done so much for her. They have done virtually zilch for my DC.
The car is literally just sitting there rusting.

Ds should buy another car, not mention it again. But neither you or your ds should have anything to do with the car when it’s inevitably doesn’t start.

It won't matter her DP will get it fixed and use it . He has already borrowed it for weeks last year.

If it’s impossible to communicate, how did your son give them an offer? How are you expecting them to confirm that they accept it?

This is the problem
It should be a decision made between my sister and I. She thinks it's not fair on her DC if one of my DC buy the car. Never mind her DC has a much more expensive car. This is a 4k pound car ( rough currency exchange)

if you and your sister have joint poa both of you together can decide if it's a fair offer. that is what the poa is for, and if in doubt you can call the public guardian and trustee to confirm.
again remember if you both have poa you will both be needing to dispose of their belongings come day and hopefully equitably.
how you and her view this is important, it should virtually be at an extreme low cost/favor to both of you for saving you both the hassle of dealing with it in ten years time.