To think this is outrageously irresponsible parenting

[CaffeinatedMum]

On holiday in France at a Eurocamp park. Yesterday I was in the outdoor pool and noticed a little boy maybe around 18 months, certainly no older than a young 2, bobbing around by himself in a float vest. For context my six year old was out of his depth in all of this pool apart from the steps to get in, so it wasn’t a toddler type splash pool.

I watched him for a minute as he didn’t seem to have anyone with him and then both me and another lady went up to him to ask him where his mummy or daddy was, obviously he didn’t reply as was very young. Led him to the steps and his older sister came rushing up to him, I can’t imagine she was more than five (considerably smaller than my six year old).

Long story short, the parents were watching the kids from the bar nearby with their friends. This isn’t a pool bar and they weren’t in swimwear. it’s the other side of a gate and foot bath. So yes you can see the kids but you’re a fair distance away, not just on a lounger next to it,

They absolutely fell about with laughter when their son was helped out of the pool.

I genuinely can’t believe how irresponsible this parenting was… I am assuming I will get a unanimous YANBU but obviously there are parents out there who think this is not only ok but funny.

Now kicking myself for not saying anything to them about it but didn’t want to cause a scene, they were quite a big intimidating group standing their laughing their heads off.

on our holiday this summer, I lost count of the number of kids (mainly around 3-7) getting out of their depth and struggling before another nearby adult (not their own parent) helped them to the side. Probably about 2-3 kids per day. Each time I would usually clock the child and other adults close by. Then the adults have to first check we haven't missed a parent, that the child really does need help and the adult is not acting inappropriately by helping (you can see these thoughts going through the other adults minds). By this point the child is usually quite distressed but the actual 'assistance' is usually quite quick. Most were struggling just out of reach of the steps.
once helped to the steps they would usually run straight for their parents who would be set back on a sun lounger reading or in several cases completely with their backs to the pool.
this happened so frequently I couldn't even alert parents due to a) not being able to leave my own kids and b) not knowing what reaction you would get.

Have there ever actually been any cases of parents told to leave a campsite because a child was in a pool?

Sorry - I’m not being difficult, I’m just pointing out that nothing actually ever happens.

Had a similar incident, I was waiting for DD to come out of an activity which had a dance studio next door, parked across the road, with a 60kph speed limit. The alarm on the car in front of me started going off and suddenly a little boy of around 4 emerged from the back seat onto the pavement, looking really shocked and scared. I went to him and he said he’d been asleep and been left in the car. Once he calmed down a bit he realised where he was and said that Mum was probably picking up his sister from dancing. The studio was glass fronted and I could see a lot of parents there. I explained I could take him to find his mum but he would have to hold my hand to cross the road, which he did. When we got inside the studio he ran to his mum who put her hand on his head and just carried on her conversation, didn't even question how he’d got there! I’m not usually confrontational but I did shout across the busy reception area and tell her how lucky she was!

And I think I’ve told this story before but once at a local beach (we’re in Australia) there was a large family near the shore line with an inflatable swan. A little girl around 5 was playing in it. Next thing we see all this commotion and people running, look to see what they’re running towards and its the swan, much further along the beach and out past the buoys that mark the safe swimming area, so in deep water and with jet skis etc, turns out the 5 year old was still in it. A guy in a canoe got to her first and kept her calm and then a jet skier brought her back in, several adults who’d attempted to swim to her also needed rescued. Very much a case of there was so many adults in their group, they all thought someone else was watching her.

WTF? They are absolute idiots - their poor children.

Completely irresponsible. The fact they weren't even in swimwear, and we're stood a fair distance away, at the bar, tells you all you need to know. Their priorities weren't their children, but having drinks at the bar.

Children shouldn't be left unattended in water, especially very young children. It takes seconds for something to go wrong.

Unfortunately, some people really shouldn't be parents. They are selfish and incapable of putting their children's needs above their own wants.

Lots of mums at softplays get into fights? What? I've been to lots of soft plays and never seen this. Same for kids fighting...what type of softplays do you go to?

I thought you were going to say the parents were oblivious because they were glued to their phones. I’ve seen this too often, at both pool and beach.

My brother is like this. He was very vocal in wanting me to have two boys ‘because they will fight and it’s funny.’ Weirdo.

We’ve been on 2 Eurocamp holidays this summer and I’m with you! I saw this repeatedly over the three weeks we spent in France! Kids were repeatedly left unsupervised some with swimming vest and some without. My mind boggles that parents expect other people to supervise their kids. Having a swim vest on doesn’t make your child safe! On another note I have been left unimpressed by EuroCamp this year, it has certainly gone down hill!

In my nhs job (not even a bit patient facing) we have to do safeguarding children mandatory training, because safeguarding children is everyone’s responsibility. Wonder if that’s why there’s not liability, but a want to tell a more “adultier” adult

No, they'd be too busy blaming various innocent people, probably including the OP and planning to sue the resort.

I was thinking about that thread too. There are some real idiot irresponsible parents around. 🙁

That poor child. There was a post recently from a lady who's child had tipped back and his head gone under water in the second she looked away while he was in one of those life vests so it's lucky the toddler didn't do the same (ps I hope the op from that post managed to stop feeling awful about that poor love)

On holiday a few years ago with friends and we noticed a young child, about 3 years old, alone in the pool. She just had armbands on. Looked around for who she was with, no sign of anyone. Me and my friend ended up walking around the pool, asking people if she was their child. Still no luck so reported it to a member of staff who put a call out over the tannoy.
Parents were in the jacuzzi, which was through another door off the swimming pool area....
Why do they think it's ok to do that??

Yes - irresponsible.

But one of my DDs was able to swim well at 2 years. I of course still watched her like a hawk, but was in trouble at one pool for allowing her to swim in the deep end and dive in, even though it was clear she could swim like a fish.

This makes me so mad because I’ve never been very “mumsy” and used to often doubt myself. DD is now 11 and I’ll let her do things/go places on her own like to the toilet in a restaurant. And I’ll still panic sometimes and think “has she been a while, what if something’s wrong?!”. Couldn’t imagine ever doing something like this. We went to Greece last year just the two of us and on a boat trip she was taught how to use a paddle board by the captain but couldn’t get to grips with it and floated just a bit too far away (were loads of people and me in the water) but she panicked and I had to try and swim to her and I felt awful. Like a really shit mum.

Were recently at a theme park and to be fair I didn’t notice until they came back and someone started having a go at them. But there was a baby and toddler sleeping in a pushchair that someone had parked up and left to go on a rollercoaster! The mind boggles.

It should be. Any place catering to the public should have a lost child policy and the staff should be briefed in the policy. Safeguarding is everyone's business

Does surprise me - we were on the beach in Spain while on holiday earlier in the summer, DC had made friends with a couple of kids (young primary) earlier in the day at kids club, saw them in the beach later on and they naturally wanted to play together. Parents completely ignored their kids as they went in the water. They wanted to go much deeper than mine and I kept having to call them back in case the tide was too strong. Madness

I agree safeguarding is everyone’s business but nothing will happen unless it’s part of an overall picture.

I posted on another thread recently about a 4 year old who was left in a pool in Greece on his own. He drowned.

The mums get in fights? Do you mean actual physical ones? 😧

Sadly I've seen similar when abroad. I've had to approach parents a few times to watch their young children. Its usually met with mind your own business.

I think people go into holiday mode and think nothing bad could happen. And if they're with friends, especially friends who don't have kids, the friends encourage them to lower their (possibly already low) level of supervision. Add on alcohol and you have a recipe for disaster.

If you're genuinely concerned about, say, an unattended child in the pool, of course you should tell staff. If they can't or won't help, isn't it your responsibility to insist they call a manager? After all, safeguarding is everyone's responsibility.

Not to make it about that whole other story but I do think this was the social phenomenon going on with the famous Tapas crew.

Peer pressure, basically.

I read that. The poor mum was shaken up which is understandable, and felt very guilty! She certainly wasn't laughing! What is wrong with these parents?