To think this is outrageously irresponsible parenting

[CaffeinatedMum]

On holiday in France at a Eurocamp park. Yesterday I was in the outdoor pool and noticed a little boy maybe around 18 months, certainly no older than a young 2, bobbing around by himself in a float vest. For context my six year old was out of his depth in all of this pool apart from the steps to get in, so it wasn’t a toddler type splash pool.

I watched him for a minute as he didn’t seem to have anyone with him and then both me and another lady went up to him to ask him where his mummy or daddy was, obviously he didn’t reply as was very young. Led him to the steps and his older sister came rushing up to him, I can’t imagine she was more than five (considerably smaller than my six year old).

Long story short, the parents were watching the kids from the bar nearby with their friends. This isn’t a pool bar and they weren’t in swimwear. it’s the other side of a gate and foot bath. So yes you can see the kids but you’re a fair distance away, not just on a lounger next to it,

They absolutely fell about with laughter when their son was helped out of the pool.

I genuinely can’t believe how irresponsible this parenting was… I am assuming I will get a unanimous YANBU but obviously there are parents out there who think this is not only ok but funny.

Now kicking myself for not saying anything to them about it but didn’t want to cause a scene, they were quite a big intimidating group standing their laughing their heads off.

A while ago I came across a toddler wandering around on a patch of grass near my house.. it was surrounded by houses and many people there who live in them let their kids play on it, but he was all alone. I watched for a bit wondering if there were parents watching him. After a bit I went over asked where his mum and dad were. He was so little his speech wasn't great but he kept pointing at the pub nearby and saying party...there's a function room upstairs so I took him there and found his absolutely dozy, very posh mother sitting there without a care in the world. I explained i had found him wandering around outside she was totally oblivious and flippant and looked at me like i was mad

Of course the staff can do something about it - they can tell the parents that a 2 year old is not allowed in the pool unsupervised. Holiday resorts and hotels always have rules in place about this.

They have a level of liability if there was an accident so of course they would care.

Waiters/ bar workers can fetch a manager if they are not confident but they will all have been told the rules around the pool if they work near one.

That isn’t really in the job description of a 20 year old serving drinks, is it?

It’s up to you but I am not seeing this as a ‘tell the staff’ thing. The only one who’d be interested is the lifeguard if there is one.

If someone told a waiter that a 2 year old was unsupervised in the pool, then they would be perfectly able to go and get a manager. Of course that is within their remit. If they work in a hotel with a pool then they will have been told about the pool rules and what to do if something happens.

I wouldnt bother parents have no regard and sound dyfunctional at home as well. Then you wonder why kids are acting out and have adhd issues

@wiredandtired the ‘manager’ has no more authority than you do in this instance. They aren’t the police and they aren’t social services and they are very unlikely to want to get involved.

I saw this on the other thread where a young child was making a bit of a nuisance of himself and that was the same. ‘Tell the staff! Tell the staff! Tell the staff!’ I’m going 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ I don’t know what people think is in job description of people working in campsites is but telling parents how to parent their children is not one of them.

@CaffeinatedMum
Some parents don't deserve the privilege
The fact that his sister suddenly appeared shows it may be "her job" to always do so and keep tabs on him
Willing to bet if he'd drowned
They'd have blamed everyone else
And the poor eldest child too

Of course they have authority to tell someone to get out of the pool.

They own/ manage the hotel and the pool, and if someone were to drown in their pool they would be liable.

A 2 year old in a pool unsupervised in a situation where they could drown is a bit different to a child 'making a nuisance of himself'.

Every eurocamp I've been to has signs up around the pool saying children must be supervised. I used to go and sit and watch my kids until they were about 12. So it is worth mentioning to the staff if you see it again so they can speak to the parents. They aren't going to want a child drowning on one of their sites.

I remember being on holiday with some friends when I was about 18 and playing a game with some younger kids of about 6 or 7 in the pool. Every time they saw us at the pool after that, the parents would just try to leave their kids with us!

Whenever we go to Eurocamps just how relaxed parents seem to be with their tiny kids amazes me. Last time we found a toddler, screaming her head off, about 10pm having fallen off her scooter near the campsite bins. This was a huge site which opened straight onto a busy road. She only spoke Dutch but we eventually figured out where her tent was, about 10 mins walk away, and her parents hadn't even noticed she was gone!

I remember my divorced next door neighbour's ten year old walked to his dad's instead of waiting to be picked up. He was upset. No charge on his fone so I took him.in- he knew me to say hello to. Cue mom and dad separately rocking up, obviously relieved but distressed. Neither one ever thanked me. They are lucky it was me. They knew I had enhanced DBS, due to the nature of my job.

That's terrible. I don't what's wrong with these people

Someone needs to have a sharp word with the pool lifeguard as well. No way would that be allowed in the UK.

@wiredandtired parents are responsible for their children, not the manager of the bar or whatever.

This was a similar tragic case. Nothing about the hotel being responsible for it. It’s notable the pool was packed at the time.

I mean by all means, tell somebody, but I know from working in these places the most you’re likely to get is a weak smile and they’ll tell the parents ‘someone (and may make it obvious who!) has said …’

If something happened to him. They would get rightfully arrested and charged with manslaughter and neglect

Very unlikely they would do anything about it. They earn minimum wage and most are probably teenagers. Really can’t see them going and telling off the ‘big intimidating group’ of guests who are all pissing themselves laughing. They’re unlikely to tell their manager either, they won’t want the hassle if the situation was resolved. The only way to maybe get it reported is to ask to speak to a manager yourself then you might have a chance of them taking it seriously, although it’s still not guaranteed

We were sat by a pool on holiday years ago. I was reading my book when a toddler in one of those seat things floated into my peripheral vision. “Oh look” thinks I casually “that child is drowning”. I went back to my book and a nano second later the cogs started whirring.

Two nano seconds later I was starting to scream “help” (I am a crap swimmer) but had only got as far as “hel” by which time the lady next to me was already off her lounger and diving in. The dad came sauntering over looking more annoyed that anything else. Didn’t even say thank you just grabbed the child and started to saunter back off. Which was his second mistake ‘cos he got it both barrels from the lady with added narrative from the assembled onlookers

Went back a few years later and exactly the same thing happened. It was all very much “I’m on me holidays, nothing bad can happen”.

The parents could, not the people working at the campsite.

I once asked staff to step in and help with a child who was being a nightmare at soft play and they were useless! ‘Do you know who his parents are?’ Er no, why would I? ‘Well we’ll keep an eye.’

Yes, unbelievably awful. But nothing new. unfortunately. Remember those awful TV programmes that featured parents’ videos of their DC having accidents? And that they were canned when it was realised that some parents were setting the incidents up? People filming their children being hurt for TV entertainment?

There are some people who need to be publicly shamed for their cruelty to their own children.

But if a child kept following you round on holiday overseas and was being neglected, who would you tell other than the child's parents or members of staff?

This is neglect, as are many other stories in the comments. The child was in real danger and so was his sibling. Well done for helping. They need reporting.

Some parents feel it's their god given right to relax on holiday and they won't let their wee brats spoil it for them...even if it verges on neglect. Or is neglect.

You’d have to tell their parents, but I get why you might not want to. On the thread with the annoying four year old the OP did tell the staff and nothing happened.

You wouldn’t tell anyone else. You’d just tell the parents. If you thought a child was genuinely being put in serious danger I suppose you could call the local police but unsure how much help they’d be

@CaffeinatedMum why were the group including the parents laughing? Where were they from?