AIBU to wonder if giving cash to a stranded tourist was naive

[LovingLilacDuck]

I just got approach by a tourist woman in Paddington who said she got her purse stolen in Oxford Street. She asked me for some cash as she had to put blockage on all her bank cards because they were stolen. And she needed the cash to go to her hotel or something like that. She was good looking, she said she was a lawyer from Amsterdam and was soft spoken but also a little nervous. And she was so happy when I gave her the cash that she gave me a hug and thanked me in a genuine way.

I helped her because she seemed genuine. Of course, there is a chance she could be a scammer herself so a part of me feels a bit sad and naive. But I just want to hope that she wasn’t and I helped a woman in need.

What would you do in this situation? I am just curious. xx

Deffo a scam.

I would have done the same, and given her some money. I do like to see the best in people so yeah it was probably a scam, and I wouldn't have done any different.

I had my purse stolen in Lisbon, and when I called to cancel my cards, my bank offerred to get money to a local bank for me if I needed it so I wasn't stranded.

NC

Soon after university, a number of years ago, I attended an interview for my first graduate role. My then bf dropped me off.
After the interview, I came out to find that I had lost my purse and my phone was off. It was not at a time where charging points were easily available or apple pay existed.

I was fully dressed in a pant suit, looked neat and tidy, etc. I had never ever in my life been in a position where I had to ask anyone for anything apre from my parents. I’d always had everything. I plucked up courage and asked a number of people to give me the £1/£2 or whatever it cost for a single bus journey so I could get home. No one wanted to help.

I was on the verge of tears and then suddenly looked up to find someone that I had attended secondary school with that I had not seen since we left school. I started telling my story and she said she didn’t even need to hear it but was in a rush to make an appointment and she gave me a tenner. I asked for her details so i could pay it back but she said no.

I will be so grateful to her forever. I met her many years later at a school mate’s parent’s funeral. She needed an uber but her phone was struggling for reception. I didn’t hesitate to book the expensive uber and pay. She contacted me to try and repay but of. purse I said no. She had completely forgot about the £10 but i will ever forgot. I will repay for that day over and again, if I get the chance. I don’t know how I would’ve got home that day.

I would give someone enough money for the bus or whatever and take it as paying it forward.

ps I got the job btw

I've been approached by people like this in the past, 30 odd years ago. Probably scammers but you know what? The day we stop caring is a sad day, even if it means we're in danger of being conned. You did a nice thing OP, out of kindness. That's the bit to hang on to!

But it’s not a good thing you’ve done. Usually it’s funding criminal activity and these people are controlled by gangs. You’ve done a bad thing. Horrible in fact

Sorry but I just think you're a professional scammer trying to normalise the scam online

Why didn't you ask the receptionist to help?

Only if not genuine.

Well obviously you've been had. Lost my wallet and need money to get home? Literally the oldest scam going.

Sorry op it's a scam. Most people have cards on their phones now so if you lose a purse they are on the phone. She obviously had a phone if she'd cancelled her cards.Any tourists know you don't take all your cash with you you keep some in the safe. Would you ask a random stranger for money even in emergency? There's no way I would. I'd call a relative to help me or police/embassy. You kindness has been taken advantage of and of course she gave you a hug and looked happy she's got what she wanted. My friend has been scammed because she's a lovely christian woman who always wants to help but her kindness has been used against her. She now knows to ask the right questions. These things happen and it was only £30 at the end of the day but these bastards really piss me off.

Op. I think it was a scam but dont beat yourself up. You tried to do a nice thing and help someone.

As a pp said, I am hardened to it and that isn't a good thing and I do sometimes wonder if some of the people I said no to, were genuine (there is one occassion when I really regret saying no).

You seem like a nice, caring person and that is far from a bad thing.

Her circumstances? Illegally exploiting her children.

She needed it for her next fix.

Even if the money wasn’t going to people controlled by criminal gangs (which it is), if you keep on giving then the scam will keep on going - and vulnerable people who can’t afford to throw £30 away will be stung. Let alone the fact that it literally keeps criminality happening on the streets. Shake yourself don’t congratulate yourself

From a big taxpayer subbed gaff in north London

I wouldn't have given her anything. Why would you.

Typical scam sob story.

You were played I'm afraid.

OR she's exploited. A lot of women from that area of the world are trafficked into Britain and forced into "jobs" like begging or sex work by gang masters.

Definitely a scam crikey the Romanian gypsies are well know for being scam artists.

Almost certainly not her kids.

I used to see the same toddler and young children with different women on the tube when I used to get the tube through central London every day.

The women are forced to beg by the men in the family. If they get money it is confiscated, if they don't get money it doesn't go well for them. There is usually a male member of thee family lurking close by. I am always torn by what to do.

you think there are hundreds of people all over the country each day with the same story and some of them are genuine?

No-one genuine needs £30 to get from Paddington to Oxford St. £3.20 train will do it. Or use their phone.

They are ALL scammers. The sheer amount of people on this thread that have said they’ve paid the scammers prices this. And it’s not a victimless crime. Not by far.

This always happens at major stations. I’m sure if you had hovered in the background after your encounter - you would have seen her approach someone else.

If I was asking for money from a total stranger I’d definitely be getting their email address so I could arrange to send the money back to them after. Sadly I think this is a scam but it’s lovely that you gave her the money. I gave a young girl in need a tenner once after listening fo her sob story at Kings Cross Station and then watched in dismay as she immediately headed over to a man leaning by the entrance some 100m away and gave it straight to him. I really hope she was okay, probably not, probably part of some horrendous human trafficking situation. I still think about her. And I’m glad I gave her the money, it might have made her life easier just for a moment.

That's an well known old style scam. Usually very pretty, well spoken but vulnerable acting lady seeks middle aged suit wearing man to cadge some emergency cash off. Sounds like they've evolved to target ladies on their own who will empathise with their situation.

Logically, if she had been to the police station, the police have a duty of care, especially to a lady on their own stranded with no funds abroad. They would have arranged for her to be taken to her hotel.

I’d have given her nothing as I reckon she’s a scammer , it’s a very common scam .