My mum has thrown away over £150 worth of makeup and medication

[nostyleandnoclothes]

I have a small pouch that I carry around with me everyday. It’s got a lot of medication in it (antihistamines, painkillers, stomach medicine), as well as 5 lip sticks and 4 lip liners. In total it comes to over £150 worth of stuff in a space NK small pounce (which is expensive in itself!).

I was at my mum’s on Thursday night when she complained about her having bad hay fever. I pulled out the pouch and handed it to her, and although I thought I’d put it back in my bag I must’ve left it on the side. I realised tonight it’s missing as I’ve gone through my bag ahead of work tomorrow and she’s admitted that she has thrown it away.

AIBU to say she should replace it? Both the makeup and medication she’s thrown away?

I accidently threw a brand new Lancôme Hypnose mascara in my rubbish bin. When I realised, I tipped it outside on the patio, sorted through it with my Marigolds on, gave it a wash under the tap. Job done.

OP, walk away from this thread. It's full of the usual Mumsnet posters who either

a) Want to give you a kicking for anything

b) Are incapable of reading your updates

c) Can't read and comprehend anything you've written

Some of Mumsnet posters are the lowest of the low

Ooo I did this recently. There were maggots! But I had lost an iPhone so it had to be done. 🤢

She should pay you back the £150 it will teach her not to throw away other peoples' belongings.

A lifetime of this would fill me with a murderous rage. Congratulations to you for not smothering her with a pillow.

Tell your mum that you will keep nagging her and say that you will bring it up when around other people and the shame factor may help her fold. It shouldn’t need to get to this point but clearly it has. Some people unfortunately prioritise others approval and think family can be taken for granted. I have a grandparent who is very similar; cries wolf about being poor. We know fine well isn’t. Bins things and buys new willy nilly but is as tight as anything with giving / contributing/ taking accountability but will then splash out thinking no one will clock the price of what she’s buying. No self awareness and all the blinkers on/ feels justified in their actions but it actually just leaves a really sour taste and family doesn’t have time for the ‘woe is me’ stuff when they retired before 60 and have no mortgate etc and they wonder why family don’t visit them often. It is very tedious.

You’re a better woman than me. I wouldn’t be able to forget this.

In general I wouldn’t ask for someone to pay for an accident.

This seems close to the line, though, as it doesn’t seem like she “accidentally” threw it - she remembered doing it!

It’s a bit late now to ask for it to be replaced, you should have said something whenever she told you she threw it out.

This makes no sense. Why shouldnt she retrieve it? You can wash it...madness

Shouldn't have had to ask. The mum should have offered to reimburse but she sounds like a dreadful mother,so she won't 😞

That's a very good point, actually. It blatantly wasn't an accident in the first place... but supposing it had been basically rubbish but with a possible bit of value - say, an empty crisp packet with an offer on it that OP had wanted to keep - the answer would almost certainly have been that she most probably/must have thrown it away; but the fact that she knew that she had thrown it away is very telling indeed.

You just throw everything on your worktop away? You don't bother checking what it is and sort it into recycling? If your partner had left a pan or a bag of shopping on the worktop you would just chuck that as well? Seriously, just all into the black bin?

I can't get my head round this mentality, so wasteful just throwing a load of stuff into landfill without just checking what it is. Especially if you've had friends or relatives round.

I had a friend visit recently and she accidentally left a couple of things behind. I did NOT throw them away and if I had I'd offer to replace them.

I’ve had people leave stuff behind before, never have I ever thrown them away?! That’s weird of her. Are you able to wash it all down and use it again or is the makeup ruined?

The basic lack of bothering to recycle alone gives the lie to the claim that many people who behave like this make of being ultra efficient and quick at dealing with a simple task. In reality, they're actually attempting it with the skill and wisdom of a toddler.

A task is only actually dealt with efficiently (indeed at all) if it's done properly.

Sounds like you take after your parents with your blasé response to retrieving lost belongings!

RTFT. I got it and it’s ruined.

Your mum sounds like a nasty piece of work tbh OP. 💐

A surprising number of people will express horror at reading a full thread when it's 'already far too long to read'; yet they somehow clearly believe that their adding to it and making it even longer will help - and that people (whose time obviously isn't as important as theirs) will nevertheless read THEIR comments...

But even aside from that, the number of people who will come on and post - usually with rather obvious and facile comments - without even reading all of the OPs own posts is truly baffling.

"Here, let me tell you what's happened and then see what you think about the situation."
"No, no, no need for that - I'll just guess and we'll go from the assumption that I'm right!"

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Absolutely

I love my make up

Doesn't matter. The fact is the mother threw away something that didn't belong to her. What's so hard to understand?

Can't believe the OP is getting flack for having expensive make up in the first place. Jeez 😩

Yeah, right. Into the bin with the microwave, the radio, the toaster, the lot.

Read the post. I don't bother checking what's there because I already know. I put it there. I don't usually check to see if the local poltergeist (or a careless relative) has dumped a bag of expensive make-up. It's up to the OP to look after her own stuff. My partner died some years ago, so no, he doesn't dump pans and things on the worktop. I wish he did, but he doesn't.

@nostyleandnoclothes

i know right, right!

or even… heaven forbid… lips that look nice with a nice liptick and lipliner.

some mumsnetters would keel over at such vanity!

@Tekknonan

so if you saw a makeup bag on the side what was unfamiliar to you, you would just bin it? You’d have no curiosity as to what was inside? Wouldnt spend the 5 secs it takes to open bag and check nothing of work before binning? That’s crazy! Especially not long after a guest has visited you