Would this put you off your partner?

[Heudb]

I am not sure whether to treat this as a drunken comment or something a bit more sinister. Early hours of this morning with my boyfriend, waiting for a taxi after a night out. He suggested getting a kebab - I said I was never keen on these as I was worried what was in the meat. He said that never concerned him as he ‘used to eat the arses of women he’d just met on nights out’ so he wasn’t screamish about kebabs. I told him I found the comment disgusting and he did apologise and said it was many years ago.

I find it immature at best. He’s early 30’s now!

Yeah that's pretty grim and would put me off him. If we're also being pedantic, I assume he didn't literally ingest those!

Everyone has a past and as long as it was consensual why should he be ashamed of his. The comment itself is very crass and I can understand that would have been shocking initially. But I think it’s quite funny the more I think of it.

Ughhhhh, that's stomach churning.

Yeah I know everyone has a past I just found that such a horrible term and unnecessary to bring up after a night out.

I just vomited in my own mouth. It's a no from me.

Yes, that would turn my stomach.

Well many years ago that’s what he did. He didn’t know you then so what he did shouldn’t concern you.
Howe the comment is not something you’d say to a current girlfriend. Who knows what all my husband did before I met him but he wouldn’t tell me in that manner.

Makes me think of that Kenyon, Reform candidate, and his comments about Carol Vorderman’s anus.
I think I would dump him tbh.

Screamish 😂 it would make me scream too !

That would give me the massive ick

Oh God, not another fucking neanderthal. Is this the same guy who talked about a "whiffy growler"? I'm pushing 70 and not particularly squeamish, but talk of "eating arses" makes me want to throw up. And there'd be no coming back from the ick if it was said to me. Sorry, OP.

I’d be having a lot of STI tests after that comment!!🤢🤢🤮

I don’t understand why this would upset you.

Is it that he had sexual contact with women before he met you or the wording he used?

Either way, this is a you issue.
Just ask him to not bring it up again because it upsets you for X, Y, Z reasons and then move on.

It's not remotely 'sinister' - it's crass.

Vile thing to say. Would he like it if you said “I sucked the cock of loads of strange men” when debating the merits of a sausage roll? Is he always such a tool?

At least it makes a nice change from the posts about boyfriends who only eat crisps, McDonalds, frozen gyoza and takeaways.

Dear Lord, that is not a mouth I would ever want near me again.
OP, he's a low class oik.
You have just had a peep at the real him.

This is not about having a past.
This is a man telling you that he is a vulgar, crass, uncouth lout.

Your bar is set very low! It's not the fact he has a past it's the fact he decided to share this in such a crass manner.

Grim!

Yes, it would put me off him. Cringy.

Does he eat a lot of crisps? The commoners’ kind?

Yeah, that’s a better term!

What makes you think their bar is low?
Not everyone is clutching their pearls at sexual humour. It's not about having a bar, it's about different values and personalities.

It's extremely crass and major turn off - very disrespectful.

I know that comment would be in my head every time he attempted oral sex and I'd start thinkinv of STIs - it's an orgasm killer.

So it’s the wording he used that upsets you?

In which case, surely you’d just ask him to not use that phrase again.

Or OP may not like hearing about any of his past sexual experiences, again you just tell him and move on.

"Eat the arses"??? What does that mean exactly? Rimming? <bleurghhh)