Dads using female communal changing room

[Strawberrryfields]

Not sure how I feel about this so looking for opinions and whether I should do anything.

A couple of times recently I’ve been changing my child after swimming and a dad has come in to change his child in the communal female changing room. It’s after lessons so only children changing. There are communal female, communal male and a number of individual cubicles. It gets very busy at peak times so at times you may need to wait for an individual cubicle.

It feels weird to me a grown man being in there and my instinct is that he should use the private cubicles, though he is clearly there with his child helping them get ready. I also understand him not wanting to take his child into the men’s communal changing rooms with random men in there but to me, he is a random man.

Should I say something? Would you? Chances are it’s just a normal dad changing his kid but I don’t feel entirely comfortable with it but not sure if IABU?

Still waiting for that screenshot.

Yet again, a bloke’s problem falls on women to sort out. He should be in the men’s where he belongs looking for a quiet corner so he can screen her with a towel or looking for a unisex toilet to take her in etc. Worst way, dry robe for the car journey home. The situation is NOT a free pass for a grown man to be entering the women’s changing room and encroaching on all of their privacy. JFC I am so sick of this.

Why do you deviate? @Taztoy claimed all people who are not female are male - thereby claiming that no other possibility exists. I disagree - even if a single person exists who does not meet the criteria, the statement is wrong.

There are a number of disorders that would make it difficult to unequivocally assign a sex - so the question really is: why do you force them into a binary category?

Please refer to your reply on this thread:

Taztoy · 25/01/2026 14:55
If someone isn’t female, what are they?
Alex122022 · 25/01/2026 14:48
" I sometimes think boys are considered second class citizens on MN."
I think everyone who is not female.

I don't think we're going to get it

All humans are male or female. No VSD affects both sexes. I thought you were a biologist? Is that like a trans biologist? Do you just identify as one?

You got it:

Taztoy · 25/01/2026 14:55
If someone isn’t female, what are they?
Alex122022 · 25/01/2026 14:48
" I sometimes think boys are considered second class citizens on MN."
I think everyone who is not female.

Then please tell me: how do you identify someone as male (or female for that matter)? Is the presence of a Y-chromosome enough? The presence of SRY?
What do you do with someone who has both, Wolffian and Mullerian ducts? What about those who fall within ICD-10 Q56?

It doesn't really matter what I am - it's more a question of fact, isn't it?

that’s not a screenshot.

waiting for the screenshot where I called intersex people inhuman.

(clue. I didn’t)

It doesn't really matter what I am - it's more a question of fact, isn't it?

In a word.

No.

Your eloquence is fascinating - but it's not really an argument, is it? Why don't you simply admit that you don't really care about facts or biology if it doesn't support your opinion?

I don't have to argue with you.

You've demonstrated enough all by yourself.

Still waiting for the screenshot.

actual screenshot.

it’s easy enough to do.

if I said that.

should be dead easy.

Never said you did. The statement was that someone who denies the existence of intersex people - which is a way one could interpret your claim of strictly binary sex - was considering them to be inhuman.

Perhaps you should really read before replying.

Indeed - you don't have to. And arguing with facts is a bad idea if one wants to protect one's prejudices.

But if there are no prejudices to protect: why don't you simply state how you define male and female?

No. She can do whatever the fuck she likes without having to please you or pander to you.

The answer is No Alex.

What is the difference between a screenshot and a link and quotation? Both provide the same information.

Still No Alex.

Indeed she can. But if someone accuses me of calling someone "inhuman", I believe I have the right to offer a correction.

And when people make preposterous claims about law, safeguarding or biology in a public forum, they need to accept being challenged. No-one forced you to do so.

Whatever Alex. No ones actually listening to your waffle anymore.

I used to take my son swimming and there was boys and girls changing. A mum kept walking in and out of the boys changing room to give her son stuff or whatever. I asked her to stop as my son was changing and I know he wouldn’t have wanted a random woman in there. Deffo ask him to use the cubicles, it’s not fair on all the girls in there changing.

You seem to be used to be able to bully your way out of arguments. Don't like someone? Accuse them of being illegal, an "MRA" or endangering children.

I'm sure this is usually successful as most people don't really like to play with bullies - especially bullies who become incredibly defensive when someone not only takes them seriously, but also engages with their arguments.

It's interesting to know that things haven't really changed since usenet times ...

Because I asked you for the screenshot of where I said that intersex people were inhuman.

your quote is hard for me to read due to adhd and processing difficulties, a screenshot of my entire post is clearer.

your quote doesn’t show me calling intersex people inhuman anyway.

What’s preposterous about

the law says men can’t go into women’s single sex spaces.

im a rape victim and I have a reasonable expectation that a single sex space is indeed single sex.

that means not just for a minute. Not if he’s a nice man. Not if he’s changing his daughter.

the word is no.

why do men find that “preposterous”?

And if you read what I wrote, you would also know that I never claimed that. You simply denied that people who are neither male nor female existed.