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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband told my sister to ‘fucking grow up’

391 replies

HusSisargument · 21/12/2025 16:34

I’m stuck in the middle over something which happened last night. Myself and DH met up with my Dsis and her partner for a dinner in a local restaurant.

The service was a bit slow and DH was getting a bit fed up/hangry. When it eventually came out, everything was placed into the middle for us to share out (think Chinese/thai type meal).

DH immediately started serving items on to his plate and my Dsis basically asked him to stop so she could get a video. He asked why and she said so she could upload on her to her social media. He then said the fucking grow up comment and there was an awkward atmosphere.

DH hasn’t apologised and I’ve had a shitty text off Dsis today. Luckily we aren’t spending Christmas together.

I absolutely think DH was in the wrong but he’s protesting his innocence and said having waited long enough for the food to arrive he shouldn’t have been told he couldn’t eat it.

OP posts:
Bigearringsbigsmile · 21/12/2025 17:39

Your dh was spot on!!

Miranda65 · 21/12/2025 17:40

Putting pictures of your food on social media is just tacky. Your husband may have a point.

SVR16 · 21/12/2025 17:41

Your sister is 33 and videos meals. She sounds pathetic and childish.

DH was well within his rights to call her out on such ridiculous behaviour. If I were him I’d avoid her completely in the future. Life is too short to spend with people like that.

YourWildAmberSloth · 21/12/2025 17:44

Both acted like assholes tbh, but he shouldn't have spoken to her like that.

GreyCloudsLooming · 21/12/2025 17:45

Your DH is more in the right than your sister. But he shouldn’t have sworn at her.

Sasha07 · 21/12/2025 17:49

Team DH here too. Whatever happened to living in the moment! I'm 30s too and my sister is the one who wants everything to be recorded/photographed. It's annoying AF.

LemonLeaves · 21/12/2025 17:50

Team DH. I find the whole content for socials thing to be absolutely cringe when it interferes with actual social occasions. It's bloody rude, and no way in hell am I going to sit there letting my food go cold whilst someone fannies about with filters just to get the perfect shot.

AorticValve · 21/12/2025 17:50

He's not wrong. In her 30s and videoing her meals for social media. She does need to fucking grow up. I have higher expectations of my teenagers.

Lovelanza · 21/12/2025 17:50

Team DH here. I have a mate like this and it's fucking annoying. SM winds me the fuck up. Just eat the food while it's hot fgs

phoenixrosehere · 21/12/2025 17:50

They were both unreasonable.

Being Hangry is no reason to be rude to people and often hangry people know they get this way so should have a snack beforehand and your sister should have asked while waiting if it was ok.

I don’t see the issue with asking but the timing was wrong.

Both would annoy me but I wouldn’t be rude to someone asking, but your DH more due to the hangriness because it’s always an excuse used and shows they expect others to give them grace for something they can easily control but choose not to.

Plus, you said she asked and he took it as her telling him. As another poster said, I wonder would he be that aggressive towards a man.

Original poster
HusSisargument · 21/12/2025 17:51

OriginalUsername2 · 21/12/2025 17:31

What sort of thing did the shitty text say?

That she was shocked he was so rude and it’s not her fault he doesn’t do social media so isn’t aware that’s the done thing with a lot of people in this day and age. And that it was a 5 second video for her story so could he not have just waited as the food wouldn’t have gone cold.

OP posts:
2chocolateoranges · 21/12/2025 17:52

I’m h your dh on this one, no one wants to see a photo of your food, just eat it.

Bundleflower · 21/12/2025 17:52

I’m with your DH. And I’m certain it was said with a tongue in cheek tone.

ThePoshUns · 21/12/2025 17:53

Another team husband here. Filming your food is ridiculous. He maybe could have said it a bit more kindly but your sister was being a nob and should grow up.

JHound · 21/12/2025 17:54

Your husband was 100% in the wrong.

Also I also find partners who are unnecessarily disrespectful to my family / friends do so because they have no respect for me. What your sister did was annoying too tbh. But your husband’s response was worse

shhblackbag · 21/12/2025 17:55

HusSisargument · 21/12/2025 17:51

That she was shocked he was so rude and it’s not her fault he doesn’t do social media so isn’t aware that’s the done thing with a lot of people in this day and age. And that it was a 5 second video for her story so could he not have just waited as the food wouldn’t have gone cold.

Show quote history

Holy shit, that's entitled. Would have made me even angrier.

shhblackbag · 21/12/2025 17:56

SVR16 · 21/12/2025 17:41

Your sister is 33 and videos meals. She sounds pathetic and childish.

DH was well within his rights to call her out on such ridiculous behaviour. If I were him I’d avoid her completely in the future. Life is too short to spend with people like that.

Agree. Perhaps someone should have called her out sooner.

FrivolousKitchenRollUse · 21/12/2025 17:56

HusSisargument · 21/12/2025 17:51

That she was shocked he was so rude and it’s not her fault he doesn’t do social media so isn’t aware that’s the done thing with a lot of people in this day and age. And that it was a 5 second video for her story so could he not have just waited as the food wouldn’t have gone cold.

Show quote history

"The done thing"?

Nope.

Moonnstarz · 21/12/2025 17:59

I would find it incredibly rude to be out for a meal and for someone I was with to get their phone out at the dinner table. To me your sister was rude doing this, especially as it was to video the food 🙄

BettysRoasties · 21/12/2025 17:59

It’s not the done thing apart from teens, idiots and influencers.

RecordBreakers · 21/12/2025 18:01

Not a fan of his language, but I'm also with dh.

Your sister is being ridiculous.
I have social media, but food is for eating, not filming.

Lifealwaysgetsbetter · 21/12/2025 18:03

HusSisargument · 21/12/2025 17:51

That she was shocked he was so rude and it’s not her fault he doesn’t do social media so isn’t aware that’s the done thing with a lot of people in this day and age. And that it was a 5 second video for her story so could he not have just waited as the food wouldn’t have gone cold.

Show quote history

She does need to grow up! Nobody will care about her story. Yeah maybe he shouldn’t have said fire up but it’s rude to stop guests eating so you can try to show off on your story (and most folk reading that would also think ffs and 🙄)

Snorlaxo · 21/12/2025 18:03

A 5 second video doesn’t take 5 seconds to film.

H was wrong to swear but your sister is too old for filming her meal crap.

SlashBeef · 21/12/2025 18:05

She does need to grow up. He could have been more polite about it but she was rude to ask him to wait for a nonsense reason.

Sunshineo · 21/12/2025 18:05

Your ds was rude. She does need to grow up.

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