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AIBU?

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Original poster

Husband told my sister to ‘fucking grow up’

391 replies

HusSisargument · 21/12/2025 16:34

I’m stuck in the middle over something which happened last night. Myself and DH met up with my Dsis and her partner for a dinner in a local restaurant.

The service was a bit slow and DH was getting a bit fed up/hangry. When it eventually came out, everything was placed into the middle for us to share out (think Chinese/thai type meal).

DH immediately started serving items on to his plate and my Dsis basically asked him to stop so she could get a video. He asked why and she said so she could upload on her to her social media. He then said the fucking grow up comment and there was an awkward atmosphere.

DH hasn’t apologised and I’ve had a shitty text off Dsis today. Luckily we aren’t spending Christmas together.

I absolutely think DH was in the wrong but he’s protesting his innocence and said having waited long enough for the food to arrive he shouldn’t have been told he couldn’t eat it.

OP posts:
thetruthisinhere · 21/12/2025 17:25

I’m with DH, tedious photo/video social media people are annoying and boring.

Ive got a couple of friends like this and every meal is them wanting to get videos “for the gram” of every bastard plate.

Team DH.

Tpu · 21/12/2025 17:25

Upsetbetty · 21/12/2025 16:36

I’m with your dh sorry. Fuck that.

Me too, no one wants to see the food. No one cares.

Lamentingalways · 21/12/2025 17:25

IvyEvolveFree · 21/12/2025 17:17

I get the idea he’s not a very nice man generally. Things like getting hangry during the extended wait - I’d expect a grown adult man to be able to control himself even when he’s physically uncomfortable. His manners seem terrible in that he immediately started serving himself when the food arrived instead of serving others. And finally the way he spoke to your sister - I feel like he wouldn’t have spoken to another man in that way. Regardless of how you feel about instagramming food, his manners should have dictated his behaviour even if
privately he thought her a bit of a spanner.

I think he’s going to be applauded on here because people don’t like the social media aspect. But it does sound like he was being a bit rude because he seemed to have more than one dish on his plate before anyone else had even picked one up. I think the sister needs to know her audience though and was also rude. I just would refuse to get involved if I were OP.

JustMe2026 · 21/12/2025 17:26

Sorry but DH is perfectly correct why let food go cold for a start of she wants to take pics let her order her own

Rosealea · 21/12/2025 17:26

Team hubby all the way.

YourMotherSortsSocksInHell · 21/12/2025 17:26

Your sister's an idiot and I think your DH was rude but only because it sounds like he started shovelling food onto his plate before anyone else got a look in.

IkeaJesusChrist · 21/12/2025 17:26

Team DH here too, I'd understand your sister if it was just her food but it wasn't.

WhereYouLeftIt · 21/12/2025 17:27

Team DH.

Food is for eating, not photographing.

"she said so she could upload on her to her social media"
Nobody cares about her social media, except her. And since it is very teen-girl to behave like that - yes, she should grow up.

BreadInCaptivity · 21/12/2025 17:28

Your sister was rude. She doesn’t get to dictate when people can eat food they’ve paid for just so she can get her social media likes in.

I’d have told her to get a fucking grip as well.

sprigatito · 21/12/2025 17:29

I feel the most sympathy for you tbh, you’ve done nothing wrong and you’re the one on the receiving end of a shitty text from your immature sister, not to mention having to deal with a husband who gets “hangry” and swears at people when his dinner doesn’t come fast enough. They sound like a couple of toddlers and I’d be embarrassed by both of them.

JassyRadlett · 21/12/2025 17:29

She was obnoxious and he was rude. I'd be saying that to them both and telling them to leave me out of it.

TheAutumnCrow · 21/12/2025 17:31

HusSisargument · 21/12/2025 16:56

DSis is 33, DH a bit older.

At 33, she’s being silly and irritating.

OriginalUsername2 · 21/12/2025 17:31

What sort of thing did the shitty text say?

soupyspoon · 21/12/2025 17:31

Yes she needs to grow up. Obscenities are obviously optional but the message is the same

Danceparty55 · 21/12/2025 17:32

They are both rude

HelpMeGetThrough · 21/12/2025 17:33

If you’ve had a shitty text from her OP, you could also tell her to fucking grow up, would do her the world of good to hear it again.

soupyspoon · 21/12/2025 17:33

Lamentingalways · 21/12/2025 17:25

I think he’s going to be applauded on here because people don’t like the social media aspect. But it does sound like he was being a bit rude because he seemed to have more than one dish on his plate before anyone else had even picked one up. I think the sister needs to know her audience though and was also rude. I just would refuse to get involved if I were OP.

Show quote history

Well unless he has about 8 arms thats not physically possible is it.

When food arrives at the table, its up for grabs, take whats nearest you, get on with it, dont dither and then start moving it round the table, thats what shared eating is.

Topseyt123 · 21/12/2025 17:34

Ridiculous behaviour from both of them.

Your sister was a twat for wanting to take a video for Instagram while the food was going cold, but your DH really was overly aggressive in his choice of language.

I actually share your DH's sentiments but there are less aggressive ways of expressing them while still getting the point across. Personally, I'd have told your sister that she could take her precious video of she wished but I would be getting on with my meal regardless. Then, I would have just got on with serving myself. I'd also have hoped you would have backed me up there.

BauhausOfEliott · 21/12/2025 17:35

I’m Team DH. Your sister sounds like a selfish horror and she does, absolutely, need to fucking grow up.

BettysRoasties · 21/12/2025 17:37

The only way your sister could be in the right would be that she was paying for the meal via the videos and it was known in advance.

LargeJugs · 21/12/2025 17:37

He was beyond rude with his words to your sister. Your sister … I’m with DH really fuck social media but he wasn’t tactful at all and he was rude.

ClaredeBear · 21/12/2025 17:37

I’m fine with social media but your sister needs to be aware that most people aren’t and that they will likely react badly and will think she’s childish. I get your husband was hungry and was snappy but I can also see why he would feel he was completely within his rights to say that.

yellowspanner · 21/12/2025 17:37

Team DH. He was right. Your sister should grow up

Muffinmam · 21/12/2025 17:39

I’m with your DH. Your sister is pathetic.

Who even uses social media any more?