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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend turned up unannounced with cooking equipment

95 replies

Ellienellie19 · 29/09/2024 12:52

Silly really but one of my fiends went to a gathering with me on Friday evening. We baked at her house before hand and I left some cooking equipment at hers. Went to gathering with intention that I would go back to hers and sleep over, and obviously take said equipment back to mine. But she ended up leaving early, went home and then I went home separately. I had plans most of yesterday (she knew about) and she offered to drop round after. I said yes but then she said never mind, I’ve gone out. Fine. I left my phone off this morning for some peace and a lie in. However I turned my phone on and she said yu can come whenever you’re ready. Fine. I need a shower, to brush my teeth and get dressed as I hate people coming into my home when I’m being a slouch. But as I was about to shower she turned up at my door (another family member answered) asking to see me as I have her stuff. Wouldn’t leave so now she is waiting in my house while I am having a shower and not ready. It’s stupid I know but I feel a little invaded? She has turned up unannounced before. Am I being unreasonable to be uncomfortable with this?

OP posts:
Crunchymum · 29/09/2024 12:54

What has she turned up to collect if the stuff was left at her house?

Turnitoffnonagain · 29/09/2024 12:55

I'd be irritated too. Is she the bossy type?

StarSlinger · 29/09/2024 12:55

Why didn't you just give her the equipment back.I'm sure she wouldn't be offended by the sight of you in your PJs.

ThinWomansBrain · 29/09/2024 12:55

SOunds a bit odd - think if a close friend called unexpectedly I'd say hello in PJs or whatever without making them wait while a took a shower.
Or faffing around to post and check the etiquette on MN.

ComeOnThenFanny · 29/09/2024 12:56

You said you left the cooking equipment at hers?

StarSlinger · 29/09/2024 12:56

So she's waiting downstairs and you are on MN?

mynameiscalypso · 29/09/2024 12:57

I don't understand- you left your equipment at her house. Why do you have her equipment at your house?

comedycentral · 29/09/2024 12:57

I'm confused. If you left stuff at hers, why is she collecting stuff from you?

MrsMitford3 · 29/09/2024 12:58

I'm glad I'm not the only one who is confused.

If you left your equipment at hers why is she collecting from you?

And why do you need a shower to do this handover?

Catlord · 29/09/2024 12:59

Can't she just drop the stuff off and see you soon or you go down, have a quick chat and say 'bye'? She clearly wants the cooking stuff returned ASAP for whatever reason (space, just so it's done). Not a massive deal. You don't have to formally receive her

Aquamarine1029 · 29/09/2024 13:00

Your story doesn't make sense.

AlmondsAreGreat · 29/09/2024 13:00

Why is she at your house if the stuff is at hers? Do you mean she’s returning the stuff? If so, why can’t she just leave it and go? Why do you need a shower to see her?

Ellienellie19 · 29/09/2024 13:00

I think I spoke in her perspective at the end by accident. She has my stuff and is downstairs waiting for me. I can hear her. She won’t just drop it off. I was abt to go in the shower so now I am in the bathroom writing this stalling because I find it weird her being down there while I’m showering and not ready!

OP posts:
TheShellBeach · 29/09/2024 13:00

We baked at her house beforehand and I left some cooking equipment at hers

So she's brought it back, and for some reason you couldn't take it at the door, but decided to invite her in, have a shower, then start a thread about it.

Catlord · 29/09/2024 13:00

comedycentral · 29/09/2024 12:57

I'm confused. If you left stuff at hers, why is she collecting stuff from you?

She's dropping it off at the OP's. I don't see why the OP needs to be there at all really

StarSlinger · 29/09/2024 13:01

Oh I was confused. She is returning your stuff. No need to get dressed for that.

Codlingmoths · 29/09/2024 13:01

She’s returning your stuff, to your house… I’d scramble some clothes on and go say thanks??

doodleschnoodle · 29/09/2024 13:01

Why does she need to wait for you? Just take it or someone else take it and say thanks and off she goes? Confused Is there supposed to be some ceremonial handover?

TheShellBeach · 29/09/2024 13:02

I find it weird her being down there while I’m showering and not ready

Not ready to what?
Take your stuff from her?

I'm lost.

Ellienellie19 · 29/09/2024 13:02

I’m just in that state where I’m bed rotting, after a hectic week don’t want to see anyone, tired, teeth aren’t brushed, probably weetabix in my teeth

OP posts:
ComeOnThenFanny · 29/09/2024 13:02

Just go and get your stuff and get rid of her then! Massive fuss about nothing.

Catlord · 29/09/2024 13:02

Ellienellie19 · 29/09/2024 13:00

I think I spoke in her perspective at the end by accident. She has my stuff and is downstairs waiting for me. I can hear her. She won’t just drop it off. I was abt to go in the shower so now I am in the bathroom writing this stalling because I find it weird her being down there while I’m showering and not ready!

Go down, say thanks for dropping them off, I'm just about to have a shower, shall we have coffee in the week?

StormingNorman · 29/09/2024 13:02

Whether you want her there or not she’s your guest. Why are you posting on MN and leaving her standing around like a lemon.

NahNotHavingIt · 29/09/2024 13:02

Ellienellie19 · 29/09/2024 13:00

I think I spoke in her perspective at the end by accident. She has my stuff and is downstairs waiting for me. I can hear her. She won’t just drop it off. I was abt to go in the shower so now I am in the bathroom writing this stalling because I find it weird her being down there while I’m showering and not ready!

Oh for goodness sake

Just cut the drama, go downstairs and tell her thanks and you're busy.

You're being very immature hiding upstairs and Mumsnetting.

TheShellBeach · 29/09/2024 13:02

Aquamarine1029 · 29/09/2024 13:00

Your story doesn't make sense.

Indeed it does not.