Worried about going to France with my extremely endowed DH

[MyPolitePlumEagle]

We're flying into Nice airport this Summer and were planning on spending our time along the coast. Is the rule about speedos still active at everypool? I'm worried it could look indecent for DH and like he's excited even when he's totally at ease. tya

Yes, this sort of thing has been in the news a lot recently with their new DOP laws for local produce. Please ensure he’s filled out the appropriate paperwork and registered the origin of his saucisson.

😂😂😂

Have you booked extra leg room on the plane?

Snakes on a plane!

@Saschka not just snakes...... an anaconda!

Crikey, what have I stumbled upon here?! 😶

Gosh, I feel quite put off my breakfast.

where do you get speedos from for him?

I can’t find any anywhere to fit my husband - especially when he sees me in my sexy bikini he’s like the Incredible Hulk!!

Was he the original model for Viz’s Buster Gonad and his Unfeasibly Large Testicles?

Waiting for the deletion.

It's the school holidays after all.

Why doesn't he wear 🤔 vintage victoriana means swimming costume then? L.o.l 🤣

Hello man.

I just had to check the date on the OP in case it was posted on the 1st April, but no, it is today's!

I'm sorry if I am being a tad unfriendly, but I am not even going to try to give PlumEagle any advice.

However, I did not know about this rule about speedos, is any kind person willing to tell me why the French would come up with such a mystifying rule?

I know...cursing my vivid imagination right now 🤔😖
Think I'll stick to the gardening chat for a bit, just until OP works out what to do about the possibility of the Gendarmerie swooping in on her DH 👀👮🚔

I am also going in May. Can you set him up at the other end of the beach to draw the crowds so I can have a bit of space please.

What a thread title to wake up to

Tell him to tuck, he'll look like a walking Ken doll but at least he won't cause a stir with his manliness. Or is he too big?

Wish you'd put a trigger warning at the beginning of your post op, I've gone right off these sausages I'd cooked for breakfast 🤮

Let us assume for a minute that this is a serious post.

There are male swimming trunks made out of the same material that are larger, such as the kind worn by Olympic swimmers. In black or other dark colours.

I am assuming that the OPs DH does not drive a BMW or an Audi, as men who drive them have insecurities about their size.

It is because board shirts and similar are likely to be worn as all day shorts and get grubby. The whole point of Speedo's is that no one in their right mind would wear them unless they're actually swimming.

Are French swimwear dictats on the national curriculum now? Any school child who knows about those and is willing to get up at 6am to fool a bunch of early risers should be taken to a doctors pronto imo

Or do you mean that a teacher who for some reason doesn't have internet in term time and doesn't need a well deserved break is responsible?

Both seem extremely unlikely to me

May be he could cut out the middle man and head down the coast to Cap d'Agde to avoid this issue.

Apparently the actor Errol Flynn used to wrap his around his leg and sort of bind it to the leg with string.

lol you missed April fools