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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be raging about this??! What can I do??

139 replies

Summerseat · 01/03/2023 19:10

Posted on other topics not many replies so posting on here.

Left a job 5 weeks ago that I had for 15 years, perfect work history, glowing references.

There has been a lot of thefts In my workplace over a period of time, it transpires that within the last 5 weeks there has been a talk/rumour that is was me. Staff have been told there is direct evidence it was me & witness statements. I have had NO idea about any of this. I haven't been approached in any formal capacity about these claims..yet everyone thinks its me. This is a big organisation, think one of the biggest employers in the country.

My name is being dragged through the dirt & it appears I can do fuck all about, people can say what they like however damaging it is.

The only sign I knew something was wrong is that one by one People I've known for 15 years have been blocking me.

My reputation, friendships & mental health are down the toilet. AIBU to think this shouldn't be allowed to happen?

OP posts:
Dontfeedtheseagulls · 01/03/2023 19:13

Why would they block you though?

And who has given you this info?

And what did HR say when you asked them to corroborate?

And what is the proof they've offered?

justsmellyemm · 01/03/2023 19:18

Join a union and speak to the rep

VladmirsPoutine · 01/03/2023 19:22

The only sign I knew something was wrong is that one by one People I've known for 15 years have been blocking me.

How did you find out this was the reason they blocked you? In other words how did you find out about the rumours?

Paq · 01/03/2023 19:24

justsmellyemm · 01/03/2023 19:18

Join a union and speak to the rep

It sounds like OP has already left her previous job where her former colleagues are dissing her.

Snoopinator · 01/03/2023 19:25

How do you know they think it's you? Was it you?

iklboo · 01/03/2023 19:27

Joe have you heard about this?

iklboo · 01/03/2023 19:28

HOW not Joe (cat standing on typing hand).

SiobhanSharpe · 01/03/2023 19:28

Have the thefts stopped since you left, leading to some people putting two and two together and made 65?
Has anyone posted anything about it online or on an intranet?

Original poster
Summerseat · 01/03/2023 19:29

One previous work colleague has told me that's what's being said. I've noticed people I've been friends with for years have blocked me. Had no idea why, it all fits now though.

No point joining a union I've left now.

OP posts:
Snoopinator · 01/03/2023 19:30

What was stolen?

Ludo19 · 01/03/2023 19:31

Sounds like you've been made the fall guy, perhaps started by the actual thief?

Original poster
Summerseat · 01/03/2023 19:31

Yes. Apparently the thefts have stopped since I left. That my guess people are thinking/saying its me because I've now left & it's stopped.

OP posts:
nervous234 · 01/03/2023 19:31

Vocabulary parade day coming up at school. My son has been given the word 'tremendous' to dress up as. Help?!?

nervous234 · 01/03/2023 19:31

Oh god, please ignore!!

Original poster
Summerseat · 01/03/2023 19:32

Money was stolen. Alot of money over a period of time. £3,500. That's exactly how I feel I've been made a scapegoat.

OP posts:
BadgerFace · 01/03/2023 19:33

I’d write to the employer telling them you’ve heard about the allegations, refute them 100% and suggest they look at wherever the rumours started coz it’s an easy guess that the thief has seen an opportunity to get themselves out of it by stopping when you left and blaming you…

VladmirsPoutine · 01/03/2023 19:34

That makes the situation even more shit tbh if the thefts have stopped since you left. If it's any saving grace once the thief remerges they'll be back to square one. Having said that, in all 15 years there was no record of e.g. time + place of thefts, items stolen and who was in the building - even if just to check against those who might have been on annual leave, not in the building or any manner of ways of ruling people in/out.

I'd write to HR with what you've heard but the problem with that is then dropping someone in the shit who could completely refute having spoken to you and risks you ruining your relationship with them.

ConkerBonkers · 01/03/2023 19:34

If I were you I would take this to the police and tell them you want them to investigate it.

Ludo19 · 01/03/2023 19:34

If a company that size has lost that amount and they're saying they have FACTUAL evidence of your supposed guilt then you'd probably already have been reported to the police. So I'm guessing they've got zero evidence.

Theimpossiblegirl · 01/03/2023 19:34

Someone is using your leaving as a way to detract suspicion. If they stop now they'll get away with it and everyone will think it's you.
You need to challenge it somehow.

Dizzydebbie88 · 01/03/2023 19:35

Summerseat · 01/03/2023 19:32

Money was stolen. Alot of money over a period of time. £3,500. That's exactly how I feel I've been made a scapegoat.

So why did management let it build up to that amount?

Why was nothing done to investigate this?

Seems like a pretty sloppy organisation to me.

Ludo19 · 01/03/2023 19:36

It's also classed as defamation of character so I'd challenge their supposed evidence OP.

DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 01/03/2023 19:37

Get legal advice before you do anything. It could be classed as defamation. HR might respond to a solicitors letter, if the rumour is widespread without evidence, then they should be investigating and clearing your name.

Original poster
Summerseat · 01/03/2023 19:37

It was being investigated. We were all of this. They were looking at everything & even installed CCTV

OP posts:
Original poster
Summerseat · 01/03/2023 19:38

@Snoopinator no it was bloody me!!

OP posts: