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AIBU?

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Original poster

To warn you to have a man present when selling something on FB?

83 replies

lonelypigorfitflea · 04/02/2023 19:47

Or at least be very careful about it.

I had someone message me a few months ago, asking to buy a big baby item.

I said okay, and he said he would send someone on his behalf to collect. Cash to be paid on collection. The Man arrived and I helped him load the item into his van. He then said he wasn't paying, as he felt the item didn't match the description

I was really confused because I'd just helped him load it on! And he seemed happy with it. He stood there watching me explain why he needed to pay me and then just calmly, face not even showing much sign of pending attack, punched me in the stomach and drove off

The police tracked the van but the number plates were stolen and not traceable to this man. He has been seen on footage of a few neighbour's Ring cameras but that's it.

Gone. I was pregnant at the time.

Please, if selling be careful or have a man with you when selling big Sad

OP posts:
Augend23 · 04/02/2023 19:49

Flip OP, how dreadful :( it never actually occurred to me as a particular risk. I don't sell anything very expensive which probably helps.

Thisthattheother1 · 04/02/2023 19:49

Awful! I hope you and baby are ok.
to be honest this is why I won’t sell anything on Facebook or any second hand marketplaces. I don’t want interaction with strangers and at my home/ random chancers knowing where my home is. I give to friends or charity shops or send to be recycled

jacult · 04/02/2023 19:51

A man being there is unlikely to make a difference, the man may have been punched or worse instead. Some people are just arseholes. Better to get the payment in advance instead, via PayPal or similar.

GCAcademic · 04/02/2023 19:51

God, I’m so sorry, OP. Are you OK?

I’ve always been a bit twitchy about this, I have to say, and do make sure DH is around if someone comes to collect something.

hourbyhour101 · 04/02/2023 19:51

I'm so sorry this happened. He sounds like a complete bell end but good news anyone who acts like this will hopefully live a long and lonely miserable life.

If people message you just explain what happened last time - as a mum I would totally get it.

hourbyhour101 · 04/02/2023 19:51

Also try vinted - no people knocking at your door

cindylawless · 04/02/2023 19:53

hourbyhour101 · 04/02/2023 19:51

Also try vinted - no people knocking at your door

I sell loads on Vinted but you can't put bulky items on there

fairgame84 · 04/02/2023 19:53

That's awful, I hope you and your baby are ok.

mrshenny · 04/02/2023 19:54

How horrible, I'm so sorry, I would be so shaken up. He punched a woman and a BABY, fucking scum! I always make sure my husband is in when people come to collect and he deals with people at the door. We don't sell stuff often as I cba usually. Hope baby and you are okay xxx

Sexypyjamas · 04/02/2023 19:54

So so awful. I never normally think this might happen. Thank you for sharing and hope your baby is ok. Just terrible.

georgiegherkin · 04/02/2023 19:55

😲

CuteCillian · 04/02/2023 19:55

I'm so sorry Flowers

PonyPatter44 · 04/02/2023 20:01

That is appalling, what a complete piece of shit he is, and I'm very sorry that the police haven't been able to do anything about catching him. I hope you and your baby are OK.

I sold a very large piece of garden furniture last year, and two men turned up in a van to collect it - it was about 7pm, pitch dark, my DP and daughter were both at work. I asked them to go round to the garden through the side gate...like that was safer. We had a light in the garden, but it was obvious I was alone. I told them my DP had just taken the dog for a walk. They also tried to haggle over the price, but I wasn't having that, and they did cough up the whole amount eventually. They were OK, but if they'd been dodgy I could have been in a spot of trouble.

Original poster
lonelypigorfitflea · 04/02/2023 20:02

Unfortunately I do think I would've been safer with DH around. I really do.

Men just seem to try less shit when other men are around that they don't know

OP posts:
Original poster
lonelypigorfitflea · 04/02/2023 20:03

PonyPatter44 · 04/02/2023 20:01

That is appalling, what a complete piece of shit he is, and I'm very sorry that the police haven't been able to do anything about catching him. I hope you and your baby are OK.

I sold a very large piece of garden furniture last year, and two men turned up in a van to collect it - it was about 7pm, pitch dark, my DP and daughter were both at work. I asked them to go round to the garden through the side gate...like that was safer. We had a light in the garden, but it was obvious I was alone. I told them my DP had just taken the dog for a walk. They also tried to haggle over the price, but I wasn't having that, and they did cough up the whole amount eventually. They were OK, but if they'd been dodgy I could have been in a spot of trouble.

Sorry you felt uncomfortable. It's horrible

Not to victim blame at all! As you had every reason to have them come later in the day. But I sold this item at around lunchtime and still he got away with it all Sad

OP posts:
Butchyrestingface · 04/02/2023 20:03

I'm so sorry this happened. He sounds like a complete bell end but good news anyone who acts like this will hopefully live a long and lonely miserable life

He's not a 'bellend', he's a violent, aggressive thieving thug. I hope he ends up wrapping his van around a tree. Angry.

Poor OP, what a terrible thing to happen. I hope you're okay now.

gawditswindy · 04/02/2023 20:05

It reminds me of this, which went viral a few years ago. But it makes you wonder how many people would be willing to do just this.

To warn you to have a man present when selling something on FB?
RunningFromInsanity · 04/02/2023 20:05

I’m sorry this happened to you but I don’t think it requires us weak females to be accompanied by males all our lives.

Surely it’s common sense to take the money before handing over the item.

Suzi888 · 04/02/2023 20:06

Shocked, that is awful. Hope you are okay, they must have been so distressing. 😢

itsjustnotok · 04/02/2023 20:07

I put a kids mini wooden ikea kitchen on for sale. I was messaged and asked if it could be collected. Yes I said. They couldn’t come until 1930. I got messages telling me they were on their way, then on my road and the demanded I carry it to them. I was on my own with my DD’s. I said they could come up but I would not come down. A bloke comes up hammering on the door and had brought a magnifying glass and torch and proceeded to argue over the price. He backed down when DH unexpectedly got in from work early. Pulled out a wad of £20’s and £50’s saying I was robbing him! I felt really threatened and was so relieved that DH arrived when he did. Never sold on there again.

TakemedowntoPotatoCity · 04/02/2023 20:11

Well I'm single and don't know any me well enough, so I guess I'm stuffed.

On a separate note, I'm sorry this happened to you.🌺

HiddenGiraffes · 04/02/2023 20:12

So sorry to hear this op. I was selling something to a guy I got a funny vibe from, so I made a point of mentioning my husband was home, and he never showed up.

Butchyrestingface · 04/02/2023 20:12

gawditswindy · 04/02/2023 20:05

It reminds me of this, which went viral a few years ago. But it makes you wonder how many people would be willing to do just this.

He'd never have made it anyway. Would still be at the Whirlies preparing to navigate 12,000,000 roundabouts.

Wheredidtheselotapego · 04/02/2023 20:17

thats Awful, hope you’re ok. I sell bulky items on gumtree and list under my husbands name after hearing similar dodgy stories

Myeyeballsareonfire · 04/02/2023 20:18

I’m so sorry OP that’s absolute awful.