Was DH unreasonable to shout at the neighbours?

[Louis45]

We have some neighbours a few doors down that took to sneaking around in the (enclosed) front garden and taking discarded cigarette butts from the designated pot we have out there for them.

Two of these plant pots went missing over the course of a year or so. It finally clicked who had stolen them the last time it happened so I put a note through the letterbox asking them to please return the plant pot. The male of the pair came and knocked on, returning the plant pot and that was the end of that.

Fast forward to last night DH arrived home at about 10pm and as he came up the path he saw one of the pair at the plant pot.. again.

Tired of them sneaking about in our garden he told him in no uncertain terms to get the "F" off his property and stop creeping about near the house late at night, he has kids in here etc.

Do you think he was being unreasonable to lose his temper? I will admit I do feel a bit unnerved about strange men creeping about in the garden, it doesn't sit well with me, however supposedly harmless his intentions were.

Your DH was not being unreasonable. Did your neighbours ever explain why they want old cigrarette butts? Filters aren’t that expensive to but surely.

Some streets do have 'em!

#TeamDH

I recognise this post. Same was posted few months ago 🙄

Depends if they are likely to set their cat on you

This post is familiar. Have you raised the issue before?

Do they have a pet bison?

To accuse this neighbour of stealing my plant pot.. 28
Lill7778 · 19/09/2022 20:57
I smoke. Yes it's a disgusting habit yada yada.. but it is what it is.

I put my cigarette butt's in a little plant pot next to the porch and empty it every couple of days. You wouldn't know it was there unless you knew I stood out there smoking, which this neighbour does as he sees me regularly.

Said neighbour lives a few doors down and is always on the bum, asking people for cigarettes and picking discarded ones up off the floor.

My other half has caught him snooping around near my front door a handful of times, obviously looking for cigarette butt's with anything left on them. He doesn't say anything he just styled It out and walked off.

At some point this evening 'somebody' has come up to my front door and pinched the plant pot I use to put my cigarettes in. It doesn't take a genius to work out who has done it. The other neighbours are non smokers and definitely not the sort to do something like that.

I couldn't care less about the cigarettes butt's, if he was that desperate I would've given him a cigarette if he had the decency to ask.. but the fact he's pinched the plant pot has really fucked me off. I liked that pot and may have had other plans for it.

So WIBU to confront him even though there's no concrete evidence that it's him?

A few years ago another of these plant pots with cigarette ends in went missing. It's only now I'm connecting the dots. Arsehole.

Is that the same poster?! It’s got to be!!

Strange

I posted on mumsnet about the plant pot stealing incident yes, this is a follow on from it. Not the same post.

Thanks @Bigslippers , I thought it sounded familiar.
@Louis45 I how your neighbours have no stopped stealing your plant pots.

How= hope

They want the butts because they run out of tobacco. Last time it happened and he brought the pot back he blamed it on the woman who he lives with, saying she was desperate for a cigarette.

It isn't an isolated thing though and once I managed to confirm that they were the ones who took the second pot, it all fell into place as them being responsible for the one a year or so prior.

It's a regular thing.

I think they're alcoholics.

Except it quite clearly IS the same post.
Weirdo.
(Not the pretend neighbour)

Yes I'm the same poster, I NC regularly.

I'm confused.

Yes I'm the same poster, still having problems with the same neighbours coming onto my property. How am I the weirdo please?

Stop putting cigarette butts in a handy pot outside your front door and dispose of them properly, and - voilà! - your longstanding neighbour problem is solved. They stop skulking around, DH has no need to shout at anyone.

That feels a bit victim-blamey to me.

I should be able to put what I like in my garden without having to worry about neighbours creeping around of a night time.

Let me get this right..

Somebody is taking a plant pot off your property because it contains some dog ends?

Just remove the bloody pot and do something else with your fag ends

This doesn't really warrant a post on MN, let alone two

Your neighbour's sound very scummy. I've only ever seen vagrants do this

Yes, you should be able to. But since you can’t, surely it’s better to solve the problem than stand on principle?

Could you offer to tip out the plant pot into a plant pot of their own once a week?

Just pour some water on the butt's when you're finished?

Flick your fag ends into their garden instead, everyones a winner

Bloody hell, how scummy of them. I'm delighted your husband yelled at him but unfortunately I doubt it will make much difference as for them to be so brazen they are either perma-drunk or just DGAF about anything.

I empty the pot every second day or so. I'm not going to put freshly extinguished fags straight into the wheelie bin for obvious reasons. I don't have a back garden.

Sorry blippi I must have missed the memo with regards to what does and does not constitute a post.

It might be a non event to some but it isn't for me, the bloke is a bloody creep and I'm in here on my own with small DC 5 nights a week.