Was DH unreasonable to shout at the neighbours?

[Louis45]

We have some neighbours a few doors down that took to sneaking around in the (enclosed) front garden and taking discarded cigarette butts from the designated pot we have out there for them.

Two of these plant pots went missing over the course of a year or so. It finally clicked who had stolen them the last time it happened so I put a note through the letterbox asking them to please return the plant pot. The male of the pair came and knocked on, returning the plant pot and that was the end of that.

Fast forward to last night DH arrived home at about 10pm and as he came up the path he saw one of the pair at the plant pot.. again.

Tired of them sneaking about in our garden he told him in no uncertain terms to get the "F" off his property and stop creeping about near the house late at night, he has kids in here etc.

Do you think he was being unreasonable to lose his temper? I will admit I do feel a bit unnerved about strange men creeping about in the garden, it doesn't sit well with me, however supposedly harmless his intentions were.

Loads of options here - give up smoking, use a bin, fill pot with water so butts are unusable

Put a mousetrap in the pot

Vinegar in the pot

Switch to vaping.

Buy your neighbours some ciggies.

I knew a pub landlord who had one of those metal, wall-mounted ashtrays that emptied from the bottom. Local street dwellers would bust it open to get fag ends, leaving loads all over the pavement. Landlord started pouring bleach into the ashtray to dissuade them, you could do that…

But as you don’t seem to be very mad at them, the idea of keeping the pot within reach from outside your garden also seems a good one!

Ex Smoker here

It's shabby that he's creeping round your garden at night to steal discarded cig street butts. It attracts him.

Throwing cig buts in old plant pot (with some water) by your door is not good. Glad you are scrubbing it , planting something in it

Use an old rinsed jam jar with lid for you discarded cig butts. Fuller 2/3 with water. Take it with you when you go out.

Drop your ash and cig butts in there. When finished, lid on, gently tip it up and down 4 times visually check water fully extinguished butt and no smoke

Put that pot elsewhere - preferably on side if not full and out your back garden until emptied next morning

Empty it once or twice a day straight into outside bin in small sealed bag (just drain the water from it first)

Yanbu
DH is not BU to shout at man creeping around your garden at night

You could do stuff like add bells to your gate and put up motion detector lights to make it less easy - because if he's rummaging around your garden then who else is?

Switch to vaping. However, I would not be offering cigarettes or tobacco to the neighbour they’ll be knocking all the time seeing u as a soft touch next it’s couple of quid as they are out of electricity or gas iyswim.

@Louis45 not the point of the thread at all, but scrubbing the pot out & putting a plant in it, isn't going to improve your plant kill rate. But a plastic cacti!!

as you know which house it is, put another note through the door telling them you'll contact the police if they enter your front garden again.

put some soil in with the water. Make it really manky.

or use this as the catalyst to ditch the rest of your cigarettes.

Or maybe even quit.
I can't believe anyone can afford to smoke these days. What does it cost - about £50 a week - blimey who has that kind of money to throw away on something that does nothing but damage their health.
Yeah I know, addiction etc, but thousands of people quit every day so it's surely a possible option.

@Mamgetusonetokeep I can see why you're an ex smoker! I could not be bothered with that amount of faffing. (Non smoker)

I can't believe this wasn't mentioned until 8.30 this morning - over TWELVE hours after the thread was started... There's an obvious and easy answer to this..............................

STOP SMOKING.

It's a disgusting habit, it costs a fortune, it's bad for peoples health and it makes people and their home, and car STINK.

I literally can't even be friends with a smoker. Can't go into their home, can't have them in mine, can't sit near them in a coffee shop, can't go anywhere in the car with them etc etc, because of the perma-stink of cigarettes/nicotine on them. And yes they DO smell of cigarettes all the time. Don't say they don't.

I feel exactly the same about people who drink alcohol. It's a disgusting habit, bad for people's health, makes their breath stink, causes people to behave in disorderly ways and behave abusively / become overly emotional, alcoholism destroys lives. Yada yada 😴

Unless someone is an actual chronic alcoholic, NO-ONE who drinks alcohol fits this description.

Nice try though.

Try not smoking?

I think you need to use this as a great motivation to stop smoking.

Funniest response I've ever seen on here 🤣

@PurpleButterflyWings ah now, most weekend revellers are not chronic alcoholics but consuming alcohol does affect their behaviour and can and does land them in hospital. Drink driving... don't have to be an alcoholic to do that, just a fucking idiot.

I'd go empty the pot on their front door step every couple of days.

I agree, it's genius!

OP honestly I would just stop putting your fag ends in the pot. Your neighbours are obviously desperate and the temptation is too much gor

Why do people feel so entitled as to demand a stranger stops smoking and lectures them for it 😂

Completely missing the point of the thread.

Unless someone is an actual chronic alcoholic, NO-ONE who drinks alcohol fits this description.

Well yes they do. Have you never been to the pub on a Friday night?

OP just put up a drive way motion alarm in you garden, you can get them as little as £13 on amazon for cheap things. it will notify you and them when some one enters your garden, you can even put cheap PIR sensors in a plastic food bag to keep them water proof and they work.

It will just notify you and them you have a visitor when they enter your gate or path.

Either that or get a cheap Solar powered light on the wall, they cant sneek about then. That or just dose all your cig butts with chill powder.

Fill half the pot with water. And empty it before bed into a bag!