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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask why he was in the changing room next door?

128 replies

jessieminto · 01/04/2022 19:53

Met police officer caught filming woman as she undressed in Primark.

Sorry for the DM link, and hopefully I've pasted it right.

Nowhere in the article does it say why he was in the cubicle next door, with free and easy access to slide a phone under the gap and do this.

Are the changing rooms in Primark not spectated by male/female anymore?

mol.im/a/10676217

OP posts:
SirSamVimesCityWatch · 01/04/2022 19:56

Most high street shops no longer have single sex changing rooms, even the ones labelled as men's and women's will let anyone in. Men are free to go into women's changing rooms, all they have to do is say that they identify as women or feel more comfortable in the women's. And no, funnily enough women aren't allowed to say that they object to that identification or that they are more comfortable with a single sex changing room.

Newrumpus · 01/04/2022 19:59

spectated

Superb autocorrect

Redshoeblueshoe · 01/04/2022 20:01

He did it because he could

DorothyZbornakIsAQueen · 01/04/2022 20:07

He did it because embedded world is upside down at the moment and nobody dare challenge a male going anywhere near female spaces for fear of being shouted down.

Whatdidisay · 01/04/2022 20:09

This is why gender neutral changing rooms and toilets are such a bad idea for women and girls, in the misguided belief that it makes things fairer for trans and non binary people it also lets in all men whom although most will obviously be minding their own business there will obviously among them be the perverts and would be attackers making these spaces unsafe for women.

jessieminto · 01/04/2022 20:09

But if this is all perfectly ok for anyone to change anywhere they want or feel like, then the changing rooms must have doors (not curtains with inevitable gaps) and sides that go ceiling to floor.

Anything less is a wide open invitation to sex offenders. I'm not being anti trans when I say this, I'm anti sex offender. And anti anything that makes it easier for sex offenders.

OP posts:
Pixiedust1234 · 01/04/2022 20:09

Welcome to the new world where men can and do anything they desire.

Whatsnewpussyhat · 01/04/2022 20:10

This is what happens when shops stupidly get rid of single sex changing rooms because some men claim their feelings make them women.

This is what we are told doesn't happen and women who want single sex facilities are mean bigots.

AHungryCaterpillar · 01/04/2022 20:11

I never realised changing rooms were mixed now I haven’t used them in years I try it on at home and return if I need to so now even more reason for me not to use them!

BobLep0nge · 01/04/2022 20:11

The changing rooms in the primark in my town are labled Unisex.

FromOurHatsToOurFeet · 01/04/2022 20:14

The joys of self ID. Any man can claim to be a woman, without changing anything about their appearance, and use a female toilet or changing room and there's nothing you can do about it. And places like Primark, John Lewis, M&S to name a few are proud of their policy on this.

Myee · 01/04/2022 20:17

What is it about the Met police?

I occasionally use a shop that has mixed changing rooms but each cubicle is fully enclosed and lockable. I'm OK with that really, but any other scenario such as curtains, gaps etc. NOPE.

If I ever found myself in a place where a male sex person should not be I would shout at him to get the fuck out, and I honestly wouldn't care if I were arrested. It might make folk more aware of what is going on. There is no such thing as bad publicity after all.

Bookworm20 · 01/04/2022 20:20

This has to change. But you know when it is likely to even be discussed as change? After thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of lives have been ruined by sexual assault.

Makes me sick.

Georgeskitchen · 01/04/2022 20:23

As predicted it's turning into a free for all for perverts, sex offenders, the whole bloody lot

ItsNotJustCharlieWhoSeesYou · 01/04/2022 20:25

Won't be shopping in Primark anytime soon.

They walk among us.

Roundeartheratchriatmas · 01/04/2022 20:27

This is why women don’t want men in intimate shared spaces.

AlisonDonut · 01/04/2022 20:27

@jessieminto

But if this is all perfectly ok for anyone to change anywhere they want or feel like, then the changing rooms must have doors (not curtains with inevitable gaps) and sides that go ceiling to floor.

Anything less is a wide open invitation to sex offenders. I'm not being anti trans when I say this, I'm anti sex offender. And anti anything that makes it easier for sex offenders.

We/people/women have been pointing this out for about 5 years.
SquishySquirmy · 01/04/2022 20:29

I don't know if the changing rooms were mixed in this case, but they are becoming more common. (This includes changing rooms which are officially mixed, and also those which are separated but where you get to choose which one you feel most comfortable in.)

In these situations, there is a balance to be struck...

It may make it easier for perverts to spy on or film partially dressed women.
It may make many women deeply uncomfortable.
It may make some women deeply distressed (especially if they mistakenly thought the changing room was female only).
It may prevent some women from using the changing rooms at all, whether for religious reasons or because of previous bad experiences, or other reasons.
It may erode boundaries and make women feel guilty for having certain boundaries at all.

.

... But it makes a small number of penis-people happier, and historically the penis-people have always been more important than the vagina-people, so really who are we to complain? #bekind

jessieminto · 01/04/2022 20:39

I'm just really disappointed this angle isn't covered by the news reports I supposed. It's really important to understand WHY he was allowed to be there in the first place. WHO granted him access? WHAT was the set-up?
Only then can we as a society decide HOW we can prevent these crimes from happening again.

OP posts:
oakleaffy · 01/04/2022 20:39

@Georgeskitchen

As predicted it's turning into a free for all for perverts, sex offenders, the whole bloody lot
Absolutely. But mentioning an acronym of three letters on here will get the comment deleted.

WHY? We don't want males in women's spaces.

Ainsiseragroignequigroign · 01/04/2022 20:41

Self Id innit, OP.
Met police. Why am I not surprised.

Lollypop701 · 01/04/2022 20:45

@SquishySquirmy has nailed it

Xpologog · 01/04/2022 20:46

He had 50-100 Cat A images of children in his home/ on his phone.
From the DM:
“ Applying for bail defence barrister Robert Morris said Chaudhry was of previous good character and had accepted responsibility for the images.

He said they had been downloaded between 2012 and 2014 and added he was 'keen' to seek help for his voyeurism.”

How the hell can anyone say he was of previously good character —- it’s bloody obvious he wasn’t —- he just hadn’t been caught.

Hiphophippityskip1 · 01/04/2022 20:47

This reply has been withdrawn

Message from MNHQ: This post has been withdrawn

BlanketsBanned · 01/04/2022 20:48

What do primark say about it, there should be floor to ceiling doors and sides in changing rooms everywhere.

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