To spend this much on ds 21st

[Tevion28]

His dad is giving me grief about it.
Ds birthday is Christmas day so combined I've spent £900 plus a holiday costing £1100 as a special 21st treat going on the 2nd of January.
Aibu his dad is giving me a hard time.

I guess it depends on how easily you can afford it. If you are well off I don't think yabu. If it means you are going to struggle for a long time, it is a big amount to spend on a birthday. Is the holiday for all of you?

Holiday is just me and ds along with some extended family members his dad isn't coming as he doesn't like going abroad.

It's cost £1100 for me and ds all inclusive.

Spend what you want / can afford. It isn’t really anyone else’s business!

It’s your money,do what you want to do if you can afford it. No one else’s business

Thanks do you think what I've spent is generous enough for his 21st birthday plus Christmas

You’re going on holiday together. The memories from that would be worth more than gold. For you and him.

Yes of course it’s enough but if you want to buy him other things that’s up to you. If you have the money you can do what you like with it

@Tevion28

Thanks do you think what I've spent is generous enough for his 21st birthday plus Christmas

First you’re asking if you’ve spent too much, then you’re asking if you’ve spent enough. Make your mind up.

Spend what you can afford. Don’t stealth boast.

If the holiday for both of you costs £1100 then youve only spent £550 on DS if that makes you feel better!!
If you can afford it then I think its a lovely thing to do and im sure youll all have a fab time.
Is his dad unhappy because hes missing out, why doesnt he go abroad?

@Tevion28

Thanks do you think what I've spent is generous enough for his 21st birthday plus Christmas

No I don’t think it is, better have a rethink.

Wow my parents didnt do anything for my 21st..
Or40th... etc

You sound fab. Its great he wants to go on holiday with you at 21.

Your money, your choice. No one else's business.

Volterra

@Tevion28

Thanks do you think what I've spent is generous enough for his 21st birthday plus Christmas

🤨

By the way this isn't a stealth boast I am genuinely asking if this is generous enough because its Christmas and a 21st all rolled into one. I wanted to know others opinions as I have been told before I'm too generous with him.

Blimey. I think my 21st was when my mother gave me a pair of tights (which she knew I wouldn't wear as I lived in Jeans so wore socks).

Hang on so are you asking if its...

• too generous.or
• not generous enough?

You must see these are opposite questions? What are you asking?

Is he your only child? Will you have to spend this on other DC? Why do you not decide together what you are buying your DC? What other things do you spend on him if other people think you are too generous with him

Can I ask both

I buy odd things throughout the year yes he is my only. Not spoilt by the way.

@Tevion28

Volterra

I was being somewhat tongue in cheek as couldn’t quite square the have I spent too much at the start of the thread with the have I spent enough later on. It’s a bit confusing what you are actually asking.

Ds dad is a miserable awkward bugger.

@Tevion28

Can I ask both

You can but it's completely pointless really. If you can afford to spend it - do, if you can't - don't. There isn't a set amount you are required to spend.

Half of the people will come on here and go - wow that's way to much I got an orange for my 21st.

Then the other half will go - I'd spend a bit more to be honest, only one holiday - doesn't seem enough.

Well first off if £1100 is the cost for both of you it is £550 for DS

Secondly if you can afford it then it's noone else's business.