I hate my neighbours

[Hihelp]

They’ve been here over 6/7 years. Kids all similar age to ours, with a new baby now.

At first I was happy that there was a family next to us with kids similar ages. Then slowly they started getting annoying. I’m listing the worse stuff below, but there’s so much more:

1. Kids and husband/wife looking out their window into our garden everytime we’re out playing cricket, or me mowing the lawn. This year I thought I’d train with my son in the evening when it’s darker, but even then I could see their curtains twitching watching me run.
2. Front curtains twitching everytime dh or me go out or come back home from somewhere. Or kids running out and asking my kids where we’re going 🙄.
3. 2 years ago, expecting me to pick up her kids from school (they go to another school) and keep them at home until she got home from work 🙄.
4. Making weird comments about whether we cook loads of food for certain events and telling me its a bit gluttonous cooking loads. (We’re not fat or unhealthy and ill cook whatever the fuck I want)
5. Not even giving me condolences when my dad passed away last year, not asking how I was coping, but messaging me a few days ago, after a year of no contact asking me to tell her where I brought my side window from, and demanded I tell her contact details of the provider of the window (wtf).

Sorry for long list. There’s so much more. I hate them so much. I needed to let that out.

Oh, I am definitely guilty of looking out of my windows.
I use it as a distraction strategy for my toddler when he is getting close to a tantrum...
"Let's see if there is any car passing by!"
"Let's see if the neighbour is grilling!"
"Let's see if the DNs dog is in the garden!"

I see nothing wrong with it honestly. It is MY window.

Look on the bright side, if someone tried to break in they would most likely report it.

Also, not sure why you gave them your telephone number. It's not required.

They sound annoying but I think you’re giving the issues too much attention.
Just ignore any comments, if they try to talk to you say “oh I’m sorry, I really have to go to the loo” (I always did this when one of my neighbors wouldn’t stop talking to me about all of her problems) and then go back inside. Ignore the curtain twitching.
Tbh you both sound too involved in each other’s business.

Neighbours can be abysmal.

Mine is a man who has -

Used a pneumatic drill on the public path to fix his pipes. This, apart from opening up a massive hole in the path, caused a violent expulsion of water that flooded the entire path.

Set up an illegal mechanic business in his garden - causing a hazardous and noisy nuisance by using blow torches, axel grinders etc.

I had to call the fire brigade because he poured petrol over a trailer and set it ablaze, right next to where my pet rabbit lives in our garden.

Wrecked his roof by attempting to repair his mouldering chimneys. He stole our tv aerial and never gave it back.

Burnt household waste in his fireplace, filling my home with acrid smoke.

I could go on.

He's a fucking awful man.

@Saladovercrispsanyday

that sounds demanding to me

And therein lies your problem op

You see shadows and take offence where there are none

Absolutely.

@Bingopants - burning waste is awful I agree. Ours would burn household waste as 3 large and a small wheelie bin wasn't enough for their household. They put it in an incinerator in the garden and it would regularly burn all night long meaning it was impossible to open the windows at all.

@mistlethrush

That is absolutely appalling!

@Comedycook

This is why I don't talk to my neighbours

+1

Tried ignoring ours once. They kept banging on the door. It was obvious we were in and were ignoring them. Next thing Mrs Neighbour’s hanging over the fence like a demented banshee banging the dining room window with her broom!

I stood, walked to the window and closed the curtains. I believe the message finally reached home.

Neighbours are strange beasts. To be avoided at all costs, whenever possible.

NB Our neighbours are beyond the pale - OP thinks curtain twitching is bad. These people put CCTV up on their back wall and it clearly points over our garden. They are creepy and quite possibly perverts ;)

She asked me where I got the window from as she can’t find the size online and I replied “I don’t know where it’s from but you need to get a quote and usually windows are made to size”So she replied, “I just want the name and contact number of the company that provided your window” that sounds like demanding to me

Dunno about the other stuff but in this exchange you were the unreasonable one.

They haven’t actually done anything all that bad, the worst was probably the school run but that’s stopped now.

I’d ignore the curtain twitching or install higher fences.

From what you have written you sound the difficult one here. Maybe it’s a case of bees to be there.

I’m not even going to go into detail with how I replied to her. I didn’t give her 1 word answers I was quite helpful, but I didn’t know where we got out window from

Also, she knows my dad passed away because my husband told her husband and her a day after it happened. But don’t need to justify this. Found it a bit off that she wouldn’t talk to me all year, spy on me from the window and then ask me about my window! But whatever!

I still despise them. That’s not gonna change because of this thread!

Despise?

You’re a loon OP!

You seem very preoccupied with your neighbours to be honest. So a match made in heaven.

Honestly you don’t have a clue about nightmare nightmares if these are your reasons to hate them.

You want nothing to do with them but want them to give you condolences about your dad dying? I’m sorry he died but it’s very strange wanting your neighbour that you’re not close to give awkward condolences. I did give our neighbour’s son my condolences and sent a card but only because I’d been the one to find his mum dead and call an ambulance.

Asking where a window came from - normal neighbour question. Thumbs up = thank you in text language.

Looking out the window when you hear a noise - normal

14 yo being nosey - normal

Sorry but you sound over sensitive in most of your post.

Just think yourself lucky that you don't have druggy neighbours playing load base music all night with a garden full of dog shit.
OP you need to get things into perspective.
They might be a bit irritating and ignorant but it could be a whole lot worse.

In terms of the side window; is it that bad? Aesthetically at least your houses will be matching?

Despise, hate, spied on? You sound like you are grieving and deflecting a lot of your emotion and thought process on your neighbour. Refocus on your emotions and grief as you sound very unregulated at the moment.

It doesn’t sound too bad to me, apart from the school thing, and even then I wonder if you have got your wires crossed.

They don't sound that bad, she can't be going on about what you're cooking that much if she hasn't spoken with you in a year until the window question which I really don't find unreasonable. Its well known advice to use tradesmen who have done a good job for other people you know. And if your neighbour has the exact same window size and replaced one, why not ask. Pretty sure myself or my husband could figure out who we used for every job we have had done in 11 years, you were just being awkward because you despise her.

If people are running up and down the back garden training it was likely causing dumping so can't say I'm surprised they looked out to see what it was.

The only thing unreasonable is the school run lift.

Hate? Despise? What exactly are they meant to have done? You are being massively unreasonable and it's no wonder there's some tension, god knows what vibes you're giving off to them if that's how you feel. I feel sorry for your neighbours!

You sound way too preoccupied by your neighbours, OP. They don’t appear to have done anything to merit this amount of headspace.

Why would you even want their condolences for the loss of your dad when you don’t even like them? It makes no sense at all.

I think you’re getting so many Yabu becayse you come across as quite petty and obsessed with them, and you’re clearly over exaggerating as well. For example she didn’t demand she asked a fairly normal question.

So that kinda makes everyone question if they are really all at their windows 24/7 spying on you.

They sound mildly annoying rather than worthy of hatred
And I’m not the most tolerant of people

I'm sure they are irritated by you too

Just ignore them.