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Original poster

DH charged me for Steak...but I'm a Veggie!

791 replies

atleastthepoochlovesme · 02/09/2021 20:04

Not irate/upset/annoyed but just wanted to see how others would feel if it were them...

DH is a lovely guy but has his quirks (don't we all). For context, we split the household bills and big purchases 50/50 so he transfers the money into my account on the 1st of each month. For anything else, we just buy what we want/need out of our own money.

A few weeks ago, DH and I had some beauty treatments by a self-employed beautician who has a beauty room at home but is also mobile. I've only visited her a handful of times before, so we're friendly, but not friends. Before we left, she was telling us about other treatments she does, so DH and I booked in for a massage at our home (DH said he would pay as a treat) which took place a couple of days ago. As we were leaving, DH asked her if she liked steak, to which she said yes, so DH told her that he would make a steak dinner for her (DH loves to cook). I thought it was a bit odd offering to make dinner for her when she was coming over to work, but it was a friendly enough gesture by him. Please note this was his gesture, not mine. I would've just given her a tip at the end!

Anyway, the day of the massage arrived; DH went to the butchers and bought the steak. While I was enjoying my massage, he was cooking away in the kitchen. Beautician ate and enjoyed the steak and DH was loving the compliments.

Yesterday morning, 1st of the month, direct debits due, I checked my bank account and found that DH had transferred £20 less than he should have. When I asked him why, he told me, "for the steak!" I wouldn't have minded but I'm a vegetarian so I don't even eat bloody steak!

Yes, he paid for my massage...thought it was a treat, but it cost me £20 in the end. Still a bargain I suppose! What would you think?

OP posts:
BlueFairiesinthesky · 02/09/2021 23:00

You’ve set a precedent OP. She’s going to expect a steak after every appointment now.

Foxmylife · 02/09/2021 23:01

Tightness is such a turn off

DoloresOnTheDottedLine · 02/09/2021 23:02

@atleastthepoochlovesme you’ve honestly made me day/week/life Grin

DoloresOnTheDottedLine · 02/09/2021 23:04

*my

Wineandroses3 · 02/09/2021 23:04

This thread is hilarious! I actually find the op husband to be hilarious too, I imagine him to be this really random off the wall type! I am just imaging the whole conversation of booking the home appointment and then saying oh and by the way do you want some steak ? 😆

FibroidFanny · 02/09/2021 23:06

[quote atleastthepoochlovesme]@FibroidFanny you sound like my best friend! Are you?! Are you Leila? 🤣[/quote]
Ha ha, no I'm not but it sounds like we'd get on!

huuskymam · 02/09/2021 23:09

I hope the postman gets a slap up breakfast every morning.

Szyz2020 · 02/09/2021 23:11

Love this thread. But so puzzled about what went with the steak. Was it literally a steak or did he serve up two veg as well? A suggestively shaped carrot and a foam smear of cauliflower purée perhaps? Because so far it sounds like she was served a bit of meat and nowt else.

CovidCorvid · 02/09/2021 23:11

That steak is super expensive…..was that the price for one steak or did he cook himself one as well and they ate together and he’s charged you for both?

Even for two steaks it’s a lot. If he’s so tight to do this he really should shop some cheaper, Aldi does nice steak.

Hawkins001 · 02/09/2021 23:15

@atleastthepoochlovesme

Not irate/upset/annoyed but just wanted to see how others would feel if it were them...

DH is a lovely guy but has his quirks (don't we all). For context, we split the household bills and big purchases 50/50 so he transfers the money into my account on the 1st of each month. For anything else, we just buy what we want/need out of our own money.

A few weeks ago, DH and I had some beauty treatments by a self-employed beautician who has a beauty room at home but is also mobile. I've only visited her a handful of times before, so we're friendly, but not friends. Before we left, she was telling us about other treatments she does, so DH and I booked in for a massage at our home (DH said he would pay as a treat) which took place a couple of days ago. As we were leaving, DH asked her if she liked steak, to which she said yes, so DH told her that he would make a steak dinner for her (DH loves to cook). I thought it was a bit odd offering to make dinner for her when she was coming over to work, but it was a friendly enough gesture by him. Please note this was his gesture, not mine. I would've just given her a tip at the end!

Anyway, the day of the massage arrived; DH went to the butchers and bought the steak. While I was enjoying my massage, he was cooking away in the kitchen. Beautician ate and enjoyed the steak and DH was loving the compliments.

Yesterday morning, 1st of the month, direct debits due, I checked my bank account and found that DH had transferred £20 less than he should have. When I asked him why, he told me, "for the steak!" I wouldn't have minded but I'm a vegetarian so I don't even eat bloody steak!

Yes, he paid for my massage...thought it was a treat, but it cost me £20 in the end. Still a bargain I suppose! What would you think?

As nice a gesture as it was,.your dp offered the steak, therefore he should bear the cost of the gesture or at least go 50/50 if you were to agree to it ?
LubaLuca · 02/09/2021 23:15

Where did the massages happen? I'm imagining on the kitchen island, or in the cellar.

emilylily · 02/09/2021 23:19

@Oogachuckachopsy

I'm still really confused that he cooked a steak dinner for the therapist who had just given you a couples massage... And she just sat and ate it? In your home? Confused

🤣 I agree with the above. Weirdest fucking thing ever.

Is your DH new to massages? Does he think you’re all in a polygamous relationship now she’s touched you both?! 😬

Yes, honestly I'd be a bit concerned about your DH cooking dinner for another woman, even in this context.

He definitely shouldn't have charged you!

JesusIsAnyNameFree · 02/09/2021 23:20

Everything is so odd about this. Why did he want her to stay for dinner? I've never asked the plumber to stay..
Why separate finances?
Why is he charging you for treating someone else to steak?

So confused.

LittleCatDog · 02/09/2021 23:22

@Bluntness100

For the first time in a long time I actually had to read this out loud to my husband, with tears streaming down my face with laughter too.

Going for your “joint beauty treatments” then getting her round for a couples “massage” cooking her a steak and rhen squabbling over the cost of it.

Do you scream at the beauty of the cistine chapel too? 😂😂😂

Me too!! 😂😂 This thread is great!
spotcheck · 02/09/2021 23:31

Oh, you're a vegetarian!
Yes, THAT is the bit that doesn't make sense🤦

MistySkiesAfterRain · 02/09/2021 23:36

@GetMeOut22

I think the dynamic is weird, he's fucking weird for cooking the therapist a steak, and you're weird for putting up with it. Also, how is a steak £40?
My thoughts too...he spent £40 on steak?!
JesusIsAnyNameFree · 02/09/2021 23:39

My thoughts too...he spent £40 on steak

Clearly wanted her to have the best! I wonder why..

Original poster
atleastthepoochlovesme · 02/09/2021 23:40

@Wineandroses3 Thank you! You are totally spot on with my DH! He is totally off the wall/random/crazy/spontaneous/hilarious/loving/protective/caring/thoughtful and so much more. That's why I'm with him and having separate bank accounts is not weird to me. I am actually surprised at the comments about the finances. It's a fixed amount every month with a margin applied which happens to be transferred to me as I'm the most organised. So not sure why people are assuming we sit down with receipts and calculators! After all, DH is too busy cooking up steak!
And yes, when he mentioned cooking steak, I looked at him as if he'd sprouted another head! No pun intended!

OP posts:
CatJumperTwat · 02/09/2021 23:43

The jokes are fun but honestly I'm quite sad thinking of a relationship where people are MARRIED but keeping tabs on exact 50/50 spend to the level of £20.

Wineandroses3 · 02/09/2021 23:44

[quote atleastthepoochlovesme]@Wineandroses3 Thank you! You are totally spot on with my DH! He is totally off the wall/random/crazy/spontaneous/hilarious/loving/protective/caring/thoughtful and so much more. That's why I'm with him and having separate bank accounts is not weird to me. I am actually surprised at the comments about the finances. It's a fixed amount every month with a margin applied which happens to be transferred to me as I'm the most organised. So not sure why people are assuming we sit down with receipts and calculators! After all, DH is too busy cooking up steak!
And yes, when he mentioned cooking steak, I looked at him as if he'd sprouted another head! No pun intended![/quote]
Hey if it works for you who cares what anyone else thinks! Look on the bright side he may be a bit off the wall but at least he is not boring! Look how much entrainment he’s given to half of mumsnet tonight and he probably doesn’t even know it 😆

MistySkiesAfterRain · 02/09/2021 23:46

@ohidoliketobe

Having reflected on this thread, I'm definitely taking my hairdresser a nice little steak and chips into my next appointment on a silver platter
Just pop it in your handbag wrapped it in a pitta and hand it over 😂
coodawoodashooda · 02/09/2021 23:48

@LoulaJ

Don't forget to tip the bin men at Christmas. A BBQ should do it

🤣🤣🤣🤣

That is the funniest thing ive read on the internet. Ever.
ChargingBuck · 02/09/2021 23:50

@CatJumperTwat

The jokes are fun but honestly I'm quite sad thinking of a relationship where people are MARRIED but keeping tabs on exact 50/50 spend to the level of £20.
Why? OP is delighted with her husband & her marriage. Even with random steak-massage nights thrown in.

Who TF are you to patronise her because she arranges finances differently from you?

Phobiaphobic · 02/09/2021 23:53

What I think is I'll never ever understand why some people run their marriages like this. Newsflash - if you get divorced you'll have to share everything out anyway. What on earth does all this book-keeping between you actually achieve? Why marry if you're not going to unite your finances? It sounds completely exhausting, like you're both in some kind of weird flat share.

HadEnoughOfBears · 02/09/2021 23:56

@atleastthepoochlovesme

I'm loving and laughing at this thread as if it wasn't my own experience!! 🤣🤣🤣
Do you think masseuse wasn't laughing and ate it incase anything else weird happened? Did she seem uncomfortable? Did she think she was being wined & dined for a threesome? 😂😂😂😂

Seriously though have you asked your DH why he thought it was a good idea?

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