To let you into a secret about being slim.....

[Yellow1793]

I’m 5’2” and an untoned size 10. Over the last year or so (lockdown excluded) I’ve spent extended amounts of time with 4 different female friends, who are all taller, slimmer and considerably more toned than me. Aside from the fact that they all exercise at least 5 times a week, they also eat like birds. Their lifestyle revolves around making healthy choices, every single day, and I’m beginning to wonder if you do this consistently if you just stop feeling hungry. One of them regularly skips lunch. Another never has more than 2 glasses of alcohol in one sitting. Another always eats about 30% less than I do.....last time I was with her she had a small pasta portion for her lunch whilst serving me 3x the amount of pasta she had AND 2 sausages. No wonder she is tiny. None of them calorie count or talk about diets because their lifestyle choice is one big diet. I’d love to have their discipline.

Life is too short.

I’m overweight. The only times I have been a normal/low-normal BMI are when I have eaten very little. Once you get into the habit of eating very little, after about 4 days you don’t feel hungry any more. This is just my experience.

When I say very little, I mean one meal a day of approx 800-1000 calories, no snacks and no alcohol.

Life is definitely too short. There's more to life than being skinny

Life is definitely too short.

Some people are hungrier than others. In the same way that some people are taller, some are shorter, some have big feet and some have red hair. People also have different appetites.

I couldn't eat 800-1000 calories in one meal and I'm obese !

I eat 500 x 3 meals.

I’m kind of with you @RatanPostmaster. I’d love to have the discipline, but just don’t I ever will.....and I like chocolate too much.

There have been lots of threads about this recently.

Basically, some women are slim through tightly controlling diet and exercise.

Plenty of us eat lots and stay slim because what we’re eating is healthy most of the time. There’s no one answer to why some people are slim and some aren’t.

Yes. This is it. But we aren’t allowed to say it out loud.

Slim people eat less and exercise more. Even people who naturally tend toward slimness, eat less and exercise more.

The slim people I know are all taller (I’m also 5ft 2 but more a 16) which helps. But if we sit for a coffee they will have a green tea, I have a latte with 4 sugars.

If they have a bit of cake with their tea, it really will be a bit of cake and it will be the only cake like thing they eat all week. Meanwhile I’ve sneaked a couple of chocolate buttons down my throat just after having three custard creams for breakfast- and then I’ll have the whole cake with my coffee.

People who are slim do not eat huge amounts of bad food. Or even huge amounts of good food. They just eat small amounts of mostly healthy stuff and have the very occasional treat.

I treat myself at breakfast lunch and dinner and also in between - and that’s the difference.

As To why - I’m not really sure.

I can do the small meals/portions, and I can do the exercising, but I cannot do the no alcohol bit! Life is indeed too short !

I think everyone knows that eating small amounts of healthy food will mean you’re likely to be slimmer. It’s not a revelation.
It’s the discipline, self control and emotional eating issues which get in that way of that.

The skinny people I know all move a lot. Nervous tics, OCD, constantly getting up to move or tidy things or walk/cycle EVERYWHERE.
Moving a lot, constantly helps too

Agree with PP, i dont see the point in diet. You eat or not eat you die past 60 at the very least lol.. and yes, unless you are seriously ill and need to restrict food choices, eat away 😃

You are doing pretty good though, size 10 is on the slender side isnt it?

Slim people eat less than not so slim people. Shocker

There has been a lot of research into why some people are naturally slim and some of the findings were related to their “little and often” approach and eating as fuel and not as an emotional crutch or lifestyle - as in they aren’t massively arsed about food other than when they are eating it. And also how much people move - not exercise but actual movement in their day.

Some people are just like this. Not suggesting each of your friends are, but some people are. Bodies are different, metabolisms are different as are people’s general NEAT levels (how much they move outside of exercise - step count / taking the stairs / walking not driving).

Also yes, consistency IS the main factor in anything. You don’t lose weight with one salad and you don’t gain it with one pizza.

If your friends are not actively losing weight then it would suggest they are eating at the right calorie level for them. If they weren’t then they’d be actively getting smaller. If you’re not gaining weight then you must be eating at the right calorie intake for you too.

Also I rarely drink, I make healthy choices and I am very active - but I’m not permanently hungry.

It's not really a secret though is it. It's a choice, that many people CBA, don't have the willpower, motivation or emotional energy to make the effort with. Some people aren't bothered, which is fine. Also, food addiction is a real thing, especially refined carbs. Some people are very poorly educated & can't cook or budget properly, it's easier to budget on ready meals & cereal than a massive list of ingredients if you're illiterate or rubbish at maths.

I've been very slim (I ate like you describe) & currently rather chubby, trying to get into shape but it's hard.

I can easily eat 800-1000 calories! A pizza or large helping of lasagne for example. If you have dinner with a starter it can quickly arrive at 800 calories. Or cheese after a main course. I have been known to eat 800 kcal of cheese for lunch from having a few bits of different cheeses. Maybe I’m just a glutton! But when I ate that way I was slim.

I think that some people just don’t have big appetites but there are definitely some who are basically hungry all the time but it’s worth it to them to be thin. I think it’s recognised as an eating disorder more now, not anorexia but ‘restricted or disordered eating’

You're really generalising there.
People with small appetites and small stomachs don't feel hard done by for eating less food it is a myth it is simply they don't have to diet as they don't over eat.

MN is full of people dying to believe that all slim people starve themselves and exercise 5 days a week. Tell that to my kit kat habit.

I do think it has to do with fast food though.

I have couple of cousins who were like super skinny(family genes) and then they moved country and bam! Now they are struggling to lose weight..

Fair play to them. Works for them, wouldn't be for me. If they're ok with it and not trying to make anyone else the same, leave them at it. If I managed their discipline a few days a week I'd be much better off but....meh.

I have really noticed how different two sisters can be. My eldest eats masses and is often starving. She probably eats 2500 calories a day and is slim. My youngest isn’t interested in eating and eats about 1250 calories a day at a guess yet is far chunkier than her sister. Metabolisms aren’t fair and equal!

I'm a (really!) good cook. I can budget. I cook from scratch every day. I'm well educated. I understand the science of weight loss / gain.
I can make healthy food taste good.
I just prefer butter and wine and a pint in the pub. And my "off" switch doesn't work.

I’m a bit confused about why you think anything you’ve said in your op is a “secret” about being slim.