To let you into a secret about being slim.....

[Yellow1793]

I’m 5’2” and an untoned size 10. Over the last year or so (lockdown excluded) I’ve spent extended amounts of time with 4 different female friends, who are all taller, slimmer and considerably more toned than me. Aside from the fact that they all exercise at least 5 times a week, they also eat like birds. Their lifestyle revolves around making healthy choices, every single day, and I’m beginning to wonder if you do this consistently if you just stop feeling hungry. One of them regularly skips lunch. Another never has more than 2 glasses of alcohol in one sitting. Another always eats about 30% less than I do.....last time I was with her she had a small pasta portion for her lunch whilst serving me 3x the amount of pasta she had AND 2 sausages. No wonder she is tiny. None of them calorie count or talk about diets because their lifestyle choice is one big diet. I’d love to have their discipline.

[pensivepigeon]

TartanTexan, I thought that until I upped my exercise and reduced my portion sizes. Fitness trackers are amazingly informative!

[TartanTexan]

Age makes an enormous difference.

[WhenPidgeonsCry]

I love food but try to eat sensibly, balanced etc as I said above. I don't know if I'd call it discipline in my case though as it's not difficult for me, whereas I know some people really struggle with that

Agreed. I eat 3 meals a day, dinner is basically whatever I want - pizza, curry, lasagne, whatever - but I don't really snack. I quite like walking my dog and riding my bike. None of this requires any discipline from me.

Staying slim really doesn't require "discipline" if you have a healthy relationship with food and enjoy physical activity. The problem is that most people don't.

[Bugslydoo]

I’m 6ft, size 8 and 37yrs old. Two DC. Eat what I want when I want and don’t really put on any weight (only on my chin-never the boobs where I want it!). I couldn’t cope with calorie counting, I like a beer and a burger and am partial to a packet of crisp! I go to one exercise class a week (pre lockdown) which is clubbercise and that’s only because my friend runs the class and wanted moral support.
One day it will catch up with me but I’m enjoying it while I can lol

[ktp100]

As they say, no point in sugar coating it because they’ll eat that as well.

Jeeeesus, do people really say this?!!!

Anything's better than being that big of a twat!

Better to be fat then a total cunt!!

[alittleprivacy]

@GodOfPhwoar Perhaps you have a good propensity for building muscle as I believe much of it is genetic and hormonal etc.

Certain body types build muscle more easily than others. Mesomorphic body types natural put on muscle more easily. For women, mesomorphic builds have hourglass figures. I build muscle super easily. 20 minutes twice a week with a pair of 4.5kg dumbbells, and some sets of push-ups is enough for me to have large biceps, and well defined delts, triceps, etc and I'm getting towards pecs I can flex and which have definitely lifted my breasts up visibly.

In all honesty, I started using those dumbbells in order to strengthen my chest and possibly get that breast lift. I didn't think I wanted such muscular arms and shoulders. But I don't think my body would have gotten so muscular and strong so easily if it wasn't actually meant to have that kind of muscle. And now I don't ever want to lose that strength, in fact tbh, I want more. Being physically strong and capable makes so many practical aspects of my life better. Especially as I, like many women, have a close family history of osteoporosis. So I do my best to push the idea that women shouldn't look so strong out of my head.

[Glenorma]

I was always fairly slim. Moved in with fat DH and it became obvious why he was fat. His portions are too large and have too many carbs, he adds unnecessary oil and cheese etc to meals, he drinks a glass of wine most evenings, has a dessert or even just a biscuit or sweets after every meal, snacks between meals, has a car and never walks, and he always eats when the clock says it’s dinner time regardless of whether he’s hungry. Of course I started eating larger meals and snacking like him, not skipping meals, riding in his car, and I gained 2st.

Since then I’ve returned to my normal habits of eating when I’m hungry and stopping when I’m full, avoiding carbs and alcohol and snacks, and the weight has mostly dropped off (I say mostly because I still ride in the car).

[changedmynamelol]

I'm pregnant atm. Also chunky. I have decided to be very serious about losing weight once the baby is born. I have stopped all unhealthy snacking now.
I finally feel that I am of the correct mindset to get slim again. It's a good feeling.

[BarryWhiteIsMyBrother]

@TheMurk

Yes. This is it. But we aren’t allowed to say it out loud.

Slim people eat less and exercise more. Even people who naturally tend toward slimness, eat less and exercise more.

The slim people I know are all taller (I’m also 5ft 2 but more a 16) which helps. But if we sit for a coffee they will have a green tea, I have a latte with 4 sugars.

If they have a bit of cake with their tea, it really will be a bit of cake and it will be the only cake like thing they eat all week. Meanwhile I’ve sneaked a couple of chocolate buttons down my throat just after having three custard creams for breakfast- and then I’ll have the whole cake with my coffee.

People who are slim do not eat huge amounts of bad food. Or even huge amounts of good food. They just eat small amounts of mostly healthy stuff and have the very occasional treat.

I treat myself at breakfast lunch and dinner and also in between - and that’s the difference.

As To why - I’m not really sure.

I m calorie counting atm and am a small size 10 (I was a curvy 10 before). When friends tell me how lucky I am I explain that I do all the things you outlined. They sigh but choose to continue to treat themselves on a daily basis.

[Emeraldshamrock]

After catching up on supersize vs superskinny high calorie food intake with lack of exercise is the main reason excluding medical/thyroid/autoimmune issues

[Emeraldshamrock]

the mad thing is that birds eat about half their own body weight every single day. Now THATS a diet I’m interested in If you were willing to workout like a bird exercise running from tree to tree, swooping down, jumping Jack every day you could easily eat half your body weight without gaining fat.
My nephew is slim toned with muscle he eats 2000 calories for breakfast he probably consumes 5/6000 calories a day for muscle and workout he is lean fit not a ounce of fat.

[BounceyBumblebee]

People are different and have different drives around food.

I've always been slim, I'm just not thsr bothered about food. I can go to 4pm without eating. I rarely get hungry and can get faint and sick feeling before feeling hungry.

I understood how hard it must be for some people to have disaplin around food when I got pregnant, I've never known a drive to eat like thsr before.

I can also leave dinner after a small amount because I'm bored of eating.

Don't best yourself up for not being disaplined around food. Some people just naturally find it harder than others, it's in the genes.

[Worldwide2]

Totally disagree that all slim ppl sit there controlling their portions.
I'm 5'3 size 8 have been all my life. I eat chocolate crisps ect every week and all my meals are normal but cooked from scratch.
Most of my family are slim too. I think the key is moderation and not eating whole cakes to yourself because that is just over eating imo.
I have bigger friends and have seen their eating habits. Pack of chocolate muffins for breakfast and just crap food upon crap food throughout the day. Not speaking for every bigger person just what iv seen personally.
So I think it's a mixture of ppl over eating and just eating utter crap/people starving themselves like you say or on a constant diet. Then there's ppl in the middle like me no starving no overeating just healthier cooking and treats in moderation.

[MrsSpenserGregson]

I don’t think it’s always the case that slim people deliberately restrict themselves. I’m just not arsed about food. I don’t think about food until
I’m hungry, it doesn’t take much to fill me up, and I’m just as happy with oatcakes and cheese / salad as I am with a roast dinner or whatever. I have just never been bothered about food. We are all so different.

[MrsSmith2021]

@GodOfPhwoar yes I agree. We often talked about how she could gain weight (she’s been trying as long as I’ve known her) and one of my pieces of advice was to still eat on those non hungry days! Obviously she’s never managed it.

Come to think of it, she also suffers with a health issue that means she can’t eat things like cheese and chocolate. That definitely helps too!

@Bunnyrun5 you’re not wrong and I wish I was more like you. I’m a size 10-12 but am happiest at a comfortable 10. Cheers lockdown. Anyway I have binge eating disorder and currently keep a food diary because I’ve had some abdominal issues and I’m trying to work out my triggers. Anyway, I eat way too much crap. As in too often, rather than portion sizes (at times when I’m not bingeing). There is always at least one treat a day and I’d love to get that down to a couple a week. I eat healthily otherwise (junk food makes me feel like crap, just can’t do it like I used to) so I know it’s my downfall.

[Isthisit22]

I am slim and fairly fit. I exercise 2/3 times a week because I enjoy it (outdoor running, etc), it's a social thing and I feel great at the end. I have always eaten small meals often (4 a day usually) and never dieted. Not particularly healthy meals-I eat a lot of bread-but my stomach is small so it's self regulating. It's all about moderation and not over eating.
It is annoying to read all these posts patronisingly suggesting that slim people have no food pleasure. I pretty much eat whatever I want (chocolate everyday etc), I just don't over eat.
Can imagine if some one started a thread suggesting all obese people were a certain way..

[BeyondMyWits]

I used to be fat, I'm slim now. Lost 3 st. The difference between being fat and slim for me seems to be that when I was fat I used to think about food all the time. When slim it doesn't cross my mind often. Sometimes, and this seems so alien to my "old fat brain", I even forget to have lunch.

The way I lost weight was through pure fear. I had a heart attack at 53. Because I was fat and ate crap. I don't do that any more.

[Notyourcat]

I have to agree- the times I’ve been slim I have eaten under 1000 calories a day and exercise d fo at least an hour a day. That said, even that doesn’t seem to be working now.

[FippertyGibbett]

I got a bit hooked on exercise a couple of years ago and was doing 5-6 hours of exercise a week. I lost weight and was really toned, but I can’t maintain that level of exercise, I don’t have the time or desire anymore.

[GinAndTonicOnIt]

And not abs

[GinAndTonicOnIt]

Eat smaller portions and exercise more abs you'll be slimmer.....

I'm really struggling to understand the big secret?? Surely this is just common sense

[GoodbyeRosie]

It's about your relationship with food isn't it? That's a psychological thing and why SW and WW are only very short term options that rely on failure as a business model.

If eating lots of food, food that is sugary , rich and fatty gives you pleasure then you are going to struggle to stop.

If your lifestyle and day to day commitments leave you too tired and with no time or inclination to exercise, then that's not going to happen either.

I am obese, and whilst not massively happy about it for health and appearance reasons, I would be a damn site more miserable if you took food enjoyment away from me, and made me exercise when I didn't want to.

[PearlescentIridescent]

I don't think you need to eat dreadfully little to be slim.

I am not slim yet but I have lost a lot of weight in the last year and I do intermittent fasting. I have one big meal and then one very big meal. No deprivation, get to feel genuinely full and even eat something unhealthy if I wish as I have the calorie budget for it.

The only thing I agree with in the OP is that yes it is a lifestyle change. And when I was my biggest and eating like a pig I couldn't imagine being satisfied on less food but if you make the right choices both your appetite and tastes change, so they are not necessarily feeling deprived either.

I do think it helps I don't drink as I have tiny DC and just don't enjoy it much anymore, which helps as alcohol has quite a lot kmof calories.

[GodOfPhwoar]

As they say, no point in sugar coating it because they’ll eat that as well.

(Sorry)

[BaggoMcoys]

I love food but try to eat sensibly, balanced etc as I said above. I don't know if I'd call it discipline in my case though as it's not difficult for me, whereas I know some people really struggle with that. I think it is easier for some people than others in that sense. There are also people who just don't really enjoy food and don't have discipline at all, it's just down to chance that they don't take pleasure in eating.

I think increased obesity is due to lifestyle or there would have been more of a problem in the past. Also in countries today where people have less access to food, yet you don't see any obese starving people. I think it can still be medical in the sense that depression/anxiety induced eating is real, as is food addiction and so on and it's just that we have access to food now that they didn't have in the past which is why so many more people struggle with that. I also think some people do put weight on easier than others because of metabolism etc, but I don't believe when people make claims like they only eat 2 carrots a day and still gain weight.