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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Baby fucking mama!

91 replies

patrickstarismyspiritanimal · 14/08/2019 15:15

My ex-dp and I never married, we didn't want to. We were together for 20 years and had 3 planned and wonderful kids.

He's got a new girlfriend who has recently had his baby. She's now calling me baby mama like I'm a one night stand and herself the mother of his child.

I don't speak to the girl, I actually have a restraining order against her but she's saying these things in front of my kids and my ex-ils.

She's very jealous of me, at one point she was stalking me and doing all kind of weird things. She knows I use this so she's probably on here searching for my old threads!

Would I bu to shover her in the bin where she belongs?

OP posts:
LoseLooseLucy · 14/08/2019 15:18

Reads like an episode of Shameless 😳

MuddyMoose · 14/08/2019 15:18

YANBU. I absolutely hate those terms - baby mama / baby daddy.
Envy

Cohle · 14/08/2019 15:19

Who cares if she says it in front of your kids and former in-laws? Presumably they all know that you and your ex were together for 20 years. She's only making herself look petty and rude - let her crack on with it.

If you have a restraining order against her then presumably there are much more serious issues here? I'd leave well alone.

RightOnTheEdge · 14/08/2019 15:20

Urgh, is she a teenager?
She sounds like something from Teen Mom.

summersherewishiwasnt · 14/08/2019 15:21

Detest that saying.
Best to ignore her, she is the baby mama. Your children have grown up. She’s a Silly arse.

Andromeida59 · 14/08/2019 15:21

She is obviously insecure and by using this deplorable language, she's only making herself out to be a total fool.

Didntwanttochangemyname · 14/08/2019 15:22

'Shove(r) her in the bin'? What does that mean?
I suggest you leave her be, encourage her to leave you be, and try your best to be a good parent to your children without adding all sorts of drama to their lives

AdelaideK · 14/08/2019 15:22

She sounds like a complete idiot. Baby mama ffs.

Travis1 · 14/08/2019 15:22

Oh god that is such a cringe term. Definitely bin for her.

RightOnTheEdge · 14/08/2019 15:22

I'm changing that to someone.
"Something" sounds really mean.

YouSayPotatoesISayVodka · 14/08/2019 15:24

Can’t stand baby daddy/baby mama shite. I’d be pissed off too. If your children start repeating these terms I’d correct them. Not in a sharp way but just to let them know it’s not a title you care for.

patrickstarismyspiritanimal · 14/08/2019 15:25

It's only bothered me because my daughter has come home and told me.

My ex-Dps new partner has severe mental health issues and apparently fixates on things and people, I'm currently the one being fixated on!

It's a horrible term that I would rather not be called by anyone.

OP posts:
PixieLumos · 14/08/2019 15:25

She's very jealous of me, at one point she was stalking me and doing all kind of weird things. She knows I use this so she's probably on here searching for my old threads!

Sounds like you’re loving the drama tbh - if she stopped calling you baby mama and behaved sensibly I think you’d be disappointed because you’d have to find something new to get wound up about. Let me guess, this is all over Facebook as well?

AryaStarkWolf · 14/08/2019 15:26

Maybe correct her, she's the baby mama, you're the babies mama

SleepingStandingUp · 14/08/2019 15:27

How old is she and how old are your children?

patrickstarismyspiritanimal · 14/08/2019 15:27

@PixieLumos I don't use Facebook and I certainly don't like the drama.

I came on here to vent rather than do it in front of my children, is that okay?

OP posts:
sue51 · 14/08/2019 15:31

Horrible expression. The new girlfriend sounds very young and insecure.

patrickstarismyspiritanimal · 14/08/2019 15:31

My children are early high school years.

I left my ex-dp due to domestic violence and I haven't seen him for years. I've never even met the new girlfriend.

It's a long story but the police were involved due to numerous prank calls, things happening to my house etc..
It turned out to be the new girlfriend who was given community service and the restraining order.

This baby mama business may not be huge on the scale if things but it's just another thing I cannot deal with after another long day at work.

Just came here to vent.

OP posts:
whattodowith · 14/08/2019 15:35

It’s a wretched term and very American, I wouldn’t expect anyone British to really use it and definitely not someone over the age of 20.

Probably best continuing to give her a wide berth, she sounds nuts.

SuperSara · 14/08/2019 15:39

I'm happy to look like an idiot posting this, but what does 'baby mama' mean?

I assumed 'young mother' but if you were with your ex for 20yrs, that can't be the case?

TurtleCavalryIsSeriousShit · 14/08/2019 15:41

It's okay @patrickstarismyspiritanimal vent away. But you're better off doing it away from AIBU.

She sounds hard work and I'm sure you're fed up.

Troels · 14/08/2019 15:43

She makes herself look like an idiot using silly terms, being jelous, saying stuff in front of your children.
Eventually the ex and his family and your children too, will see her as the idiot she is and ignore her behaviour. She may well find she's the next dumped "baby mama"

hsegfiugseskufh · 14/08/2019 15:45

you both sound as bad as eachother tbh - why do you care?

Waxonwaxoff0 · 14/08/2019 15:53

@SuperSara it's just a slang term for "mother of my child."

ElizaDee · 14/08/2019 15:56

She's very jealous of me, at one point she was stalking me and doing all kind of weird things.

My ex-Dps new partner has severe mental health issues

I wouldn't let my kids go round there is she was there. Fuck that.

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