To choose a cleaner over a pension

[OnlyFoolsnMothers]

So by way of background I’ve recently gone back to work full time, I’m out of the house from 8am-6.15pm every day- my LO 20months goes to nursery 2.5 days a week. I would say we aren’t doing badly financially but the cost of nursery, an increase in council tax and now the bastard increase in pension contributions is taking a huge chunk out of our income.
This weekend it’s really struck me how hard it is working full time with a toddler, there’s no time to do anything, every room in my house is a shit heap (despite cleaning constantly), my ironing has now engulfed our third bedroom and I feel so guilty not spending enough time with my LO at weekends.
So I’m thinking of opting out of my pension with work (you can only opt out, you can’t reduce the % contribution)- just until my LO is 3 and some free hours kick in. I’d use the money towards a cleaner/ ironing lady. I’d obviously lose out on the contributions from my company over that time but I think it would be a life saver- am I looking at this wrongly?

Do not opt out of your pension, this would be a terrible mistake. Just lower your standards with the housework: no one cares what your house looks like.

Do you have any other options, such as a local barter scheme?

Pay your pension.

Don't iron - hang things and fold things

Do not opt out. Just don’t even think it.

How much does your other half do? I notice it’s ‘our income ‘ but ‘my ironing.

This is a terrible idea. Don’t do it.

Lower your standards. And who the fuck bothers with ironing these days (apart from the odd thing that really needs it and shirts)!

Personally I think that would be a huge mistake. I know exactly how you feel and I empathise but things will improve. Opting out of your scheme could really limit your options when you retire. Make the most of your choices while you have them.

Bad idea. Imagine, being 70 and not being able to remotely enjoy retirement due to never having g much money

A clean house isn’t worth that.

Anything else you can cut? Buying coffee out, lunch?
Clear out a heap of stuff/pack it away to make it easy to keep the place?
Share it out with OH? Any holidays to take to catch up/get non iron clothes?

If you have to...I do think life should be worth living now as some of us may never need a pension

Depends what you get with your pension , if your end of salary pension right now please hold on to it for dear life.

If your like me and your predictions look worse / the same as what I pay in each month ... it’s a little less clear

Keep your pension.

Can you really not afford both? You could look for a cleaner coming every other week for a couple of hours and not do the ironing. If you really can't afford more get DH to help more and generally lower standars for a certain period.

YABU. Keep the pension.

DON'T DO IT!!

That pension is the only thing stopping you from having to work until you're over 70.

Economise elsewhere but don't give it up!

I did this for a year. I needed the £100 a month to get by. Saving for the future seemed pointless when I couldn't pay the bills right now.
I think each April they automatically put you back in.
Maybe try it for a year? Not the best idea but I don't regret it - yet.

Sorry I’m another who thinks you should lower your standards. Your home doesn’t need to be a show home. I know everyone on here cleans their skirting boards weekly but a lot of stuff really isn’t crucial. What if you set a couple of quid aside each week and maybe had a deep clean once every few months or so? For things like the skirting boards! So you just keep on top of the basics. As others have said, you can get away with not ironing a lot of things if you fold them straight away. Maybe as a one off pay for the back log ironing to be done?

Don't stop the pension. It's an essential, whereas a cleaner isn't. Lower your standards a bit. I never iron and dh just does his work shirts. Dc are 7 and 5. We look fine!

If your employer also contributes that's ridiculous, it's saying goodbye to free money. 20 minutes op, make 20 minutes a day. Worth it, it really is.

Well stop bothering about ironing for a start. We haven't ironed since DH got his shirt our for our wedding (we've since had a baby who is now 7 months!). No one cares if clothes are ironed. Just fold them. Is your LO in a good bedtime routine? Could you and DH do 30mins concerted effort each evening once they've gone down? I would do anything but stop your pension. I bet your DH isn't sacrificing his.

You can keep paying the lower percentage but then your company isn't obliged to pay anything.

You'd be a bloody fool to give it up.

Has anyone RTFT???

She's talking about stopping for 2 yrs. that's not going to ruin her pension for good is it??

As long as you absolutely, 100% start it back up again I don't see the problem.

Where is your toddler for the 2.5 days they are not in nursery?
Are they minded at home ?

I agree, opt out of the ironing. It'll feel like a big pay cut when you opt back into the pension and it'll be too tempting to stay out for a little bit longer each time it comes to opt back in to pay for something else.

The years you put into a pension at the beginning make a huge contribution to your final pot. Dont compromise those years.