FIL telling me to 'get dressed'

[Whatdoyouknow2]

FIL just called (10:50) I was in pj's still, been busy cleaning/ironing/seeing to 4 month old. Waiting for DH coming home at lunch time then going to get a shower and get dressed.
FIL tells me 'get dressed love' as though it's not right to be in pj's at this time. AIBU to be annoyed. I explained the above to him but then annoyed at myself for explaining, why should I have to?

Called on the phone or called into house?

I wouldn't have explained but would probably still go for a wash at lunchtime and get clean jammies again 😂

YANBU. How did he even know you were in PJs?

Next time he calls you tell him 'I hope you're dressed.'

Or 'Why are you so bothered about what I'm wearing?'

Sorry, into the house (no prior warning). I always get dressed first thing usually but been busy and thought what's the point in getting dressed twice?! It's really annoyed me as though he's getting at me being some kind of slob, which he knows I am far from 😂

I stay in PJs all day if im not going anywhere. whats the point in getting dressed?
Much rather be comfy.

It depends how he said it, if it was here let me watch the baby, you go and get dressed love, that's ok I think. Why is he there are you meant to be going somewhere?

No it was in a sarcastic way, he is like that but not usually with me. He does often call in to see little one as they live nearby, which doesn't usually bother me.

You explained to him? In your own house?

Ignore him! When he's looking after a baby, he gets an opinion. Otherwise, he can stop being so rude.

ThunderInMyHeart

I wasn't expecting it so it caught me off guard. I then added anyway I'll get dressed when I like, to which he didn't seem to like as though I had an attitude?! Seriously can't win!

I then added anyway I'll get dressed when I like, to which he didn't seem to like as though I had an attitude?!

Well done!

Of course he didn't like it, you should just agree with him like a good little woman.

Maybe he'll think before commenting on your appearance next time.

Maybe handing over the baby and flouncing off for an hours bath would have been better?!

Is he always a patronising arsehole?

He would hate our house today. It's horrible weather (fucking storm callum) so we are not going anywhere. I have promised my dd a movie day, with nail painting. So me, dd(3) and ds(16 weeks) are all still in our pjs and it's nearly dinner time. We are getting blankets down after dinner and watching a dvd.

Is he still there? I feel really angry on your behalf, how dare he tell you to get dressed and then imply YOU'VE got an attitude? In your own house looking after your little one?
Are you ok? I'd be asking him to leave, he sounds nasty, but maybe I'm overreacting (only you can know this).

I've never understood why people get dressed if they're going to be at home all day as I'd much rather be comfy in PJs. I just put clean ones on after showering.

That said, I would never impose my way of thinking on someone else in their own house! You don't go to your FIL's house and tell him to put on PJs because it would be weird and rude. YANBU!

He was way out of line. Its hard to find time for a shower with a baby, I'm sure I spent the first few months in my pjs till at least lunch time. Can you get your DH to have a quiet word with him?

I think I would have handed him the baby and said “ok, I’ll go have a shower now, thanks!”

I knew I joined this site for a reason! Should have gone and got in the bath I'll remember that if he comments again 😂 generally he does know better than to start with his snide comments with me as he gets them back but he obviously couldn't help himself this morning. MIL let's him get away with it don't know why she's put up with him as long as she has in honesty.

@Dobbythesockelf That sounds like a great plan!

I think he might have been trying to convey he found it awkward you were in your pyjamas and communicated badly because of embarrassment.

What a prat. If he doesn’t feel comfortable to take you as he finds you when he calls in, then it’s up to him to send a fucking text first- not for you to get dressed every morning at 7 just in case he wants to come round.

Oh I'm fine, it just annoyed me and nobody in the house to have a rant to. DH knows what he's like he argues with him as well, but knows I give as good as I get. I can overreact a bit sometimes though so thought I would get others' views before ranting when DH gets home.

He was rude. I don’t understand not getting dressed in the morning as I don’t feel like I’ve stepped into the day if I don’t - but that’s me, no reason why anyone else should feel the same! And I definitely wouldn’t be so rude as to tell someone what to do in their own house.

GingerRogered - nope he definitely won't be embarrassed, he'll have probably secretly enjoyed it. I do like to make an effort usually so whether he was just surprised to see me in pj's I don't know, it's not like he's not seen me like it before though. Think he was just that way out.

He walked into YOUR house without warning and was snide at you? I'd be taking the keys back.

Staying in your pjs means you haven't showered and you smell a bit whiffy.

It's not a good look. It's nearly noon and I'm still in my pjs so I'm not judging you.

But I'd be embarrassed if I got an unexpected visitor.