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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be livid how dolphins are portrayed compared to how they are?

666 replies

Otherwize · 06/10/2018 23:48

I am angry and sick and tired of how dolphins try and make out they are nice and friendly and cute when they are anything but. They are one of the most aggressive species in the animal kingdom, regularly involved in GANG RAPES of other dolphins that sometimes goes on for days, they also kill their OWN children so that the mother pays more attention to her husband dolphin so he can have sex with her without her being distracted by her child and they also are aggressive to humans when nobody is looking (I.e in the sea when nobody is around, not when they have an audience like at a sea world centre) But everyone says “aww dolphins are so cute and so friendly” but their not.

I think it’s because they look like they are always smiling and laughing that people think they are cute, but to me they look like they have evil eyes and cackling rather than laughing. People say alligators and crocodiles and snakes are evil what about dolphins? People only see the tame ones that like to show off to humans and do tricks and let us swim with them and stroke them and think all dolphins are like that but the ones in the wild are a different matter altogether.

Plus, people say that dolphins are clever because they use clicks to communicate with each other. Has nobody stopped to think that they may be clicking and conspiring amongst themselves?

I’m actually fuming, only because I just got back from someone showing holiday pics and they were going on and on about the dolphins and how they were so cute and I told them dolphins aren’t cute and they are dangerous and would they swim with and pet crocodiles? They Didn’t get why it was the same but any animal can turn against you and I have even saw footage of a dolphin purposely try to drown a human and drag them underwater. AND they also kill other sea baby animals and play volleyball with them, they don’t even eat them or are threatened by them, they just do it for a laugh. Why are they seen as friendly animals?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
17
Gersemi · 07/10/2018 01:28

Stick this in feminism........they might lay off the trans threads for a while

Naah, they'd start banging on about trans dolphins and whales identifying as dolphins.

Aintnothingbutaheartache · 07/10/2018 01:28

I always thought ducks had a nasty look in their eye

Shortyboo · 07/10/2018 01:32

I would expect many a mumsnet thread is actually posted by the frantic wives of these bastard dolphins. A disgrace

angieloumc · 07/10/2018 01:33

Husband dolphin 😂😂 too funny for this time of night.

Asthenia · 07/10/2018 01:35

This is so funny I can’t believe it, must be a wind up surely

MiniLeopardInTheHouse · 07/10/2018 01:43

Yes, those dolphins, taking our women, our jobs, our fish, our plastics, insisting on talking in a funny language.

MiniLeopardInTheHouse · 07/10/2018 01:50

Not forgetting committing crimes.

And dolphin husband

They'll be demanding to be entitled to civil partnerships next.

ColdNeverBotheredMeAnyway · 07/10/2018 01:56

Yikes at that frisky dolphin video posted above. And the best quote from it

"Maes said that he loves dolphins (not in "that" way)"

Glad he cleared that up.

Aintnothingbutaheartache · 07/10/2018 01:57

What about the fucking ducks?! My 15yo has just informed me that they are all rapist fuckers with funny vaginas! 😳 we used to throw bread for those evil bastards

IHopeYouStepOnALegoPiece · 07/10/2018 02:01

Sometimes MN is shit...and sometimes it gives us the gift of threads like these ❤️

ColdNeverBotheredMeAnyway · 07/10/2018 02:02

There was of course one woman who did love a dolphin 'that way'.

In a now infamous experiment in the 1970s, researchers attempted to teach captive dolphins to speak. They lived with them 24/7 in a weird flooded house... and....

"“I did have a very close encounter with — I can’t even say ‘a dolphin’ again — Peter.”

In the trailer for the documentary, Howe explains that she would masturbate Peter to keep him focused, otherwise he did not pay attention to her lessons."

The Woman who wanked off a dolphin

There was a documentary on BBC a few years ago. Utterly fascinating.

Tragically when the experiment ended, 'Peter' was removed and sent to live out his days in a dolphinarium. So heartbroken was he at losing his daily wank from his favourite human - he killed himself.

Actual. True. Story.

Joe66 · 07/10/2018 02:02

You are being unreasonable and racist. You really shouldn't post things on here that are so anti a particular race. Actually isn't there a law against dolphinism? We have them in the bay and they always come over and play bringing their calfs with them which are sometimes only a foot long. Very cute.

Aintnothingbutaheartache · 07/10/2018 02:04

Well that was truly fucking nauseating, thank you Cold for that very lovely thought for me to go to bed with

Joe66 · 07/10/2018 02:06

@Gersemi Stick this in feminism........they might lay off the trans threads for a while

Naah, they'd start banging on about trans dolphins and whales identifying as dolphins.

So funny but so true! 😂

AGHHHH · 07/10/2018 02:10

Why are you livid? Why do you even give a shit?

1forAll74 · 07/10/2018 02:13

Just going to email David Attenborough about this, I need his opinion on dolphins now.!!

DioneTheDiabolist · 07/10/2018 02:16

YANBU OP. HP Lovecraft knew the score and tried to warn us back in the 1930s.Angry They truly are the Cunts of the Sea and they are planning the destruction of mankind.Sad

GoldenMcOldie · 07/10/2018 02:26

Is the OP being serious Confused?

Aintnothingbutaheartache · 07/10/2018 02:27

Haha Dione that was very true, erudite, educated and prophetic 👍

Butterflycookie · 07/10/2018 02:36

Lots of animals kill their kids and even eat them. Even seals rape penguins, kill them and then eat them afterwards. There was an article showing a video and it was truly horrific.

MiniLeopardInTheHouse · 07/10/2018 02:37

When I were a lass, (and we didn't know any better about conditions for captive animals), my parents took me to a dolphinarium. I cleaned a dolphin's teeth with a giant toothbrush bigger than I was.

This was clearly a safeguarding issue and I am logging it with 101 first thing tomorrow.

They also took me to Stately Homes.

HappenedForAReisling · 07/10/2018 02:42

Im sure i read that ducks have 2 vaginas. For threesomes. I could be wrong...

Grin
EmperorTomatoRetchup · 07/10/2018 02:46

Are you on crack?

user1473878824 · 07/10/2018 02:49

Never mind the entire thread, for the first post alone this belongs in Classics.

Pinkstars2501 · 07/10/2018 02:49

The ducks having “two vaginas, for threesomes” finished me Grin that’s a Jay from the inbetweeners line right there!

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