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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be livid how dolphins are portrayed compared to how they are?

666 replies

Otherwize · 06/10/2018 23:48

I am angry and sick and tired of how dolphins try and make out they are nice and friendly and cute when they are anything but. They are one of the most aggressive species in the animal kingdom, regularly involved in GANG RAPES of other dolphins that sometimes goes on for days, they also kill their OWN children so that the mother pays more attention to her husband dolphin so he can have sex with her without her being distracted by her child and they also are aggressive to humans when nobody is looking (I.e in the sea when nobody is around, not when they have an audience like at a sea world centre) But everyone says “aww dolphins are so cute and so friendly” but their not.

I think it’s because they look like they are always smiling and laughing that people think they are cute, but to me they look like they have evil eyes and cackling rather than laughing. People say alligators and crocodiles and snakes are evil what about dolphins? People only see the tame ones that like to show off to humans and do tricks and let us swim with them and stroke them and think all dolphins are like that but the ones in the wild are a different matter altogether.

Plus, people say that dolphins are clever because they use clicks to communicate with each other. Has nobody stopped to think that they may be clicking and conspiring amongst themselves?

I’m actually fuming, only because I just got back from someone showing holiday pics and they were going on and on about the dolphins and how they were so cute and I told them dolphins aren’t cute and they are dangerous and would they swim with and pet crocodiles? They Didn’t get why it was the same but any animal can turn against you and I have even saw footage of a dolphin purposely try to drown a human and drag them underwater. AND they also kill other sea baby animals and play volleyball with them, they don’t even eat them or are threatened by them, they just do it for a laugh. Why are they seen as friendly animals?

OP posts:
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17
Chillyegg · 07/10/2018 18:31

I laughed at this. But I do actually agree with you!
Reminds me of that episode of the simpsons when the dolphins take over the world

Fakeflowersandlemonade · 07/10/2018 18:31

Isn't all duck and dolphin sex rape? I'm yet to hear any of them consent 🤔

Jessiemay88 · 07/10/2018 18:37

Theyre actually very similar to us...in their evils and their good playful side. The dolphins iv met in the wild havent hurt me. Surfed amongst a pod of at least 20 and they were enjoying the waves just like me

user1533903238 · 07/10/2018 18:39

I agree with you OP! I’ve been saying for years (since watching Blue Planet) what bastards they are. Sociopaths of the sea.

Thesmallthings · 07/10/2018 18:41

Well that's swimming with dolphins of my bucket list.

I had a nightmare once of being raped by a dolphin, it wasn't pleasant and this news has scared me even more.

BuggerLumpsAnnoyed · 07/10/2018 18:43

I agree. I’ve always thought dolphins were cunts.

DrMadelineMaxwell · 07/10/2018 18:43

Dusty the dolphin breaks this woman's bones with agressive behaviour.

DoYouLikeBasghetti · 07/10/2018 18:58

My little sister just sent me this link asking if I wrote it lol. I hate dolphins sooooo much. Murderous gang-rapey bastards. I'm with the OP. Grin

anitagreen · 07/10/2018 19:00

This is hilarious can it be put into classics please ?x

Lweji · 07/10/2018 19:05

I had a nightmare once of being raped by a dolphin

Isn't that how mermaids are made?
Or is it by tuna?

littlemissmanchet · 07/10/2018 19:07

First Kevin Spacey and now this

Omg I'm crying 😂

Lweji · 07/10/2018 19:07

when on holiday in the caribian, the diving instructor was terrified of dolphins.
dolphin in sight - get out of the water as fast as you can

I bet it was just the one dolphin he was afraid of. Maybe he owned him money.
Loan sharks are bad, but loan dolphins are just nasty.

waxy1 · 07/10/2018 19:08

Yeah, but nobody throws bread to the Yorkshire Ripper, do they?

Hoopaloop · 07/10/2018 19:13

Dolphins are fucking pricks.

Hoopaloop · 07/10/2018 19:13

So are Robins.

GummyGoddess · 07/10/2018 19:17

Person querying how dolphins view our skeletons, do they see in ultrasound?

I'm with op, they are evil. They are intelligent enough to know what they're doing. They also can gang up on a male in their group and rape and murder them when no females are around.

Emz1989 · 07/10/2018 19:21

Cannot stop coming back to this thread. The thread that keeps on giving! And for that, I thank you op Smile

Lougle · 07/10/2018 19:22

There are days when I need a jack for my jaw! All these years of having certain 'boxes' that creatures fit in, and this thread has just exploded them.

ArcheryAnnie · 07/10/2018 19:46

There is actually a legit academic paper entitled "Moeliker, C.W., 2001 – The first case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard Anas platyrhynchos (Aves: Anatidae) – DEINSEA 8: 243-247 [ISSN 0932-9308]. Published 9 November 2001"

Dead duck fuckers.

Thirtyrock39 · 07/10/2018 19:50

This thread is brilliant
To the pp who asked what do orcas do there was a planet earth or blue planet where a group of orcas chased a mother whale and her calf for hours and the whale was desperately trying to protect her calf and in the end the orca bastards won and killed the calf but only for the sake of it not for food or anything it was awful - I'm surprised sea world don't promote this clip more heavily ! Total pr orca disaster!!

Hazardswan · 07/10/2018 20:43

With you OP! Dolphins are overrated bastards and they are smart enough to know what they are doing.

Ants can fuck off though.

I ❤ pandas.

And sloths.

Lazy animals are my spirit guides Grin

ChardonnaysPrettySister · 07/10/2018 21:12

I'm scared of cows.

Dolphins are at least easier to avoid.

donquixotedelamancha · 07/10/2018 21:25

Dolphins are at least easier to avoid.

That's what they want you to think.

CaptainMarvelDanvers · 07/10/2018 21:35

I agree with the Panda hate. I’ve heard that the male penises are often too small to be of any use. Can anyone confirm?

I don’t mind dolphins and I love orcas, intelligent but they can be ruthless. They would work with humans and herd baleen whales to their deaths in NSW.

I think with most animals you can write off emotional intelligence but not with dolphins and whales.

ChardonnaysPrettySister · 07/10/2018 21:40

Dolphins are at least easier to avoid

On second thoughts, that bath I had planned for tonight might not be such a good idea after all..

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