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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Really petty one about DPs washing habits

86 replies

lastqueenofscotland · 03/10/2018 22:30

I don’t live with my DP but when he stays he uses my shower gel/shampoo etc. No bother but he uses so much.
He stayed last night and had a wash this morning and I’ve just gone to wash my hair now and found a new full bottle of shower gel is a third gone, and my shampoo which was quarter full had the tiniest squirt left.

My shampoo and conditioner in particular is pretty expensive stuff, and if I with nearly waist length hair don’t need a quarter of a bottle a wash he definitely doesn’t with short back and sides.
Would it be really unreasonable to tell him if he wants to use so much to bring his ownBlush
It feels like a pathetic thing for a 27 year old with a mortgage and a good job to be asking Blush

OP posts:
didyouseetheflaresinthesky · 03/10/2018 22:32

I'd commit murder over this. I don't have a patio but one would be built and no jury would convict me.

OhTheRoses · 03/10/2018 22:32

DH and DS do this. My nice lux stuff is kept from them. They have Sainos economy finest.

Original poster
lastqueenofscotland · 03/10/2018 22:34

Ah phew Grin
I thought I was being a lunatic

OP posts:
Ggirl27 · 03/10/2018 22:35

Buy him his own stuff for use when he comes to yours...

marriednotdead · 03/10/2018 22:37

Not petty at all, I'd be fuming too.
Don't let it fester, either he brings his own or you buy cheap stuff and hide yours. The CF test will be whether or not he notices and complains...

Sarcelle · 03/10/2018 22:37

Just go to poundshop and buy him some cheap shampoo etc. Hide yours.

CrazySheepLady · 03/10/2018 22:38

You're not alone, OP. I don't know how my hubby gets through so much shampoo when he has hardly any hair!

Sethis · 03/10/2018 22:38

When I go round to my DPs I bring my own crap because I don't want to smell floral all the next day, the students might question why.

It also avoids this issue entirely.

Fluffyears · 03/10/2018 22:38

Put the good stuff away when he’s over and leave cheap stuff out. He’ll probably use less and you have your good stuff to yourself. I had to do this when I lived at home as my dad would use my good stuff and any toothbrush as he never bothered to remember which one was his.

yellowspottedwellies · 03/10/2018 22:39

@Fluffyears OMG!!! The toothbrush thing just filled me with horror!!!

NorksAreMessy · 03/10/2018 22:39

TOOTHBRUSH?

ick

Crunchymum · 03/10/2018 22:40

My DP, who shaves his head (number 1) uses to use my shampoo and conditioner? WHY??

He got told to stop. Eejit.

garethsouthgatesmrs · 03/10/2018 22:40

You are right, this is petty although it would annoy me too

Why don't you buy a standard price shower gel and shampoo just for him, hide yours and leave him to it?

Cambionome · 03/10/2018 22:42

OMG - your df used your toothbrush????!! Confused

Fluffyears · 03/10/2018 22:42

Yeomit made me feel sick as he was s heavy smoker and wouldnjust grab any toothbrush. I kept mine in my room and my good products, especially after someone (not sure who) washed using my nice Clinique face soap and left if absolutely covered in pubes....boak!🤮

Original poster
lastqueenofscotland · 03/10/2018 22:44

I’m feeling a lot less unhinged now Grin

OP posts:
Villainelle · 03/10/2018 22:48

Buy a bar of soap for him and tell him you have switched to soap for the environment.

AnnieanoniMouse · 03/10/2018 22:48

I’d have no problem with buying him Sg/S/C etc at the supermarket [or telling him to bring (& leave in the bathroom) whatever he prefers], but to please not use my expensive stuff. If you can’t have that sort of conversation, where is this relationship heading?

Oobis · 03/10/2018 22:49

Can't you just buy him his own to leave at yours?

BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 03/10/2018 23:01

Leave him out a bar of soap to shower with, it's almost impossible to use too much of that. I've changed to soap for myself anyway and quite like it. The shampoo thing would drive me nuts, I pay a fortune for shampoo that I'm not allergic to, but I don't need to use much of it so it works out at about the same cost as good supermarket shampoo unless some fucker uses a ton of it.

Missingstreetlife · 03/10/2018 23:01

Cheap bog standard stuff for general communal use if anyone stays.
Your own personal good stuff kept seperate for anyone who wants to buy their own. Good rule in any shared house.

AbsentmindedWoman · 03/10/2018 23:02

Oh no. Unacceptable!!! Some products cost a small fortune! Plus it's just really annoying to run out and have to replace all the time. And wasteful and unnecessary!

ViserionTheDragon · 03/10/2018 23:03

I'm with you OP. Another vote for buying cheaper stuff and hiding yours - as he's a guest while he's staying over, it's nice to provide some for him. Doesn't have to be the expensive stuff at all.

SaltyPeanut · 03/10/2018 23:09

I have had this with DH for over twenty years. Not so much the using loads but using my products. Doesn't matter how many products I get him specifically to suit his skin/hair type, he'll be in mine if the bastard thinks my back is turned. Cunt even used to ferret it out of my makeup bag and disappear off in secret with my concealer stick and I'd find beard stubble holes in it. He would deny it even though he had no idea what he was doing with it and I could see it caked in little lumps in his stubble. He didn't even wash his greasy face first...boak.

My bath products, hairspray, mousse, creams, lotions and potions. He even helped himself to my prescription steroid cream because he had a bit of detergent rash on his hands even though I told him it's not recommended for use on hands.

He just seems to believe that whatever I buy for me must be better than what I buy for him which is not true at all, I stay in the same price range.

For me, it's also a respect issue and I have bollocked him into leaving my shit alone for the most part now but it took donkeys years and I can tell he just itches to use my stuff.

I personally think it may have an element of big dick swinging, A.K.A 'Me big man. Me take what me want.", albeit possibly subconsciously sometimes.

If you take the relationship further, start hiding your expensive stuff now and be aware this behaviour/entitled attitude can and probably will extend to nicking your chocolate/cream cake/crisps when your back's turned.

Samantha2018 · 03/10/2018 23:10

Buy something for him to use & leave it out for him