Right, sorry to have to kick off on a negative note. I actually was thinking (while I should have been focusing on the guests) how my original intention was for the object to bring some joy to someone who was having a hard time. In a weird way, I think that happened on this thread, because as awkward and annoying as this situation was, it did seem like telling the story brought some silly fun to people, so that makes me happy. I'm one who when things go wrong says to themselves 'oh well it will be a good story one day' & clearly this makes an interesting story if nothing else!
Ok- the ending! Not what the majority hoped but I'm happy with it.
This afternoon DH received a text from DH of CF. it was a screenshot of a bank transfer of $400 (sorry, sleep deprived and can't be bothered converting it to pounds this time maybe £250ish?) from DH of CF to us. DH of CF then called my DH and explained that he was buying the object from us, that morning he had found the item in their house and driven it straight to his Dad's. His Dad was apparently thrilled and before DH left had called a buddy around to look at it.
DH of CF apologised again, and said 'if it makes you feel any better' the $400 had been taken out of funds they were going to use to buy CF a Kate Spade handbag for Christmas. DH of CF said she might be getting coal instead.
He said CF will calm down and want to resume our friendship, and he hoped I felt the same way.
So there it is, I hope it's not too disappointing. I want to thank the people who were nice and who kept me company with their funny comments at all hours. I'm really chuffed to think that people all over the world got a tickle out of this silly series of events.