To stop frequenting this restaurant?

[FannyTheFlamingo]

DP and I go to a particular restaurant once a week or so and have been for a while. Everyone there knows us, makes us feel very welcome, always willing to change a dish for fussy DP etc.. But there's this one waitress, who is so flirty with DP it's pissing me off and bordering on embarrassing. DP is completely blind to it (so he says) and I'm not worried about him reciprocating but sometimes I feel it's a bit disrespectful to me. The last time we went there, she went into the kitchen to get 2 new members of staff out to look at him with a 'that's who I've been telling you about' gesture. AIBU to not want to go there anymore or am I being over sensitive?

I wouldn't be bothered. He goes home with you doesn't he? Let her look.

She should be more discreet but it wouldn't bother me too much, I mean his with you so she can look if she wants he'll still be with you

This would bother me- it impacts on your enjoyment as a customer. I think it is inappropriate and would complain.

It would bother me and we would stop going
But to be fair I am abit of a jealous/crazy/insecure/twat
I can openly admit that haha

If it was the other way round would your partner be happy?
Really depends what type of people you are...

It would irritate me. Especially I I enjoyed everything else about the place and wanted to keep going there.
Is there a manager there that you're friendly with and could have a quiet word with? It's quite unprofessional of her.

It would bother me a lot, she's being unprofessional and disrespectful, if it were a man doing it to you he'd be classed as sleazy and a creep, there's no difference in this situation.

Make sure to add a few pda to your trip. . . She will stay away then. .

That would really bother me - not because I'd see her as a threat or anything, but because it's sleazy and really really disrespectful to paying customers to openly perv on them and/or their partners. I wouldn't go anymore - that's just not on.

It is rude of her and not very professional, but I think id be quite flattered. Have a quiet word with the manager though if it bothers you.

Just speak to the manager.

How bizzare getting people out to look st him so brazenly. Are you sure that's what she was doing? She wasn't pointing you all out as regulars and that she's not just being friendly,when she talks to him?

I only ask because I have known women where another women, especially an attractive one, smiles and jokes with their husband and they think it's flirting when everyone else can see it's not even remotely, because they have jealousy and self esteem issues.

It's the getting new members of staff out to look at him publicly that makes me think you've misread this in some way....

Is he taking other women in there on the evenings he isn't with you? Is she actually flirting with him or behaving oddly because 'she knows something you don't know'.
Either way it's all far too much intrigue for a mid-week dinner place. I'd switch restaurants

I wouldn't like this either. Time to try another restaurant?

I'd call her out on it.

Does she want to show them the good looking bloke or the fussy twat who comes every week, knows what's on the menu and still asks them to change it instead of just going somewhere with something he will eat?

Get a hobby, then you will be less obsessed with warning other women off your (probably entirely average) DP.

Or, stamp your little foot and make a big fuss. If you want to end up on one of those Reddit threads about unmitigated twats who make restaurant staff's lives so entertaining.

Hi OP I get this a lot as DH is "famous" ahem

Once the waitress forgot to even take MY order as she was so focused on DH

It's a shame if it would put you off going to a restaurant that you otherwise enjoy....

If you see her pointing and chatting about him again I would DEFINITELY call her over and ask, very politely, "is there a problem?" She needs to be called out on it otherwise she will just carry on

Potteringalong: Oh good one!

flicker you know you're going to be deluged with people asking for clues now, don't you

Are you absolutely sure you've actually interpreted the situation correctly?

Because there are some people who are a bit obsessed with the idea that everyone fancies their partner. My ex was always claiming that men were flirting with me or 'eyeing me up' but he was talking absolute nonsense. The things he insisted were 'flirting' were just ordinary friendliness or politeness and as for the 'eyeing up', it was all in his head. I have also been accused, back when I did bar work, of flirting with someone's boyfriend ... a man I wouldn't have touched with a ten-foot pole, let alone flirted with.

That could have been written by my Dsis! She has this exact problem! So we all went one night for dinner and it was happening exactly as my Dsis said it was and it was awful, cringeworthy in fact. Really disrespectful and as Cheeky says, it spoils it for you and so I would say something to her directly or the manager but beware, waitresses get to your food before you do.

I wonder what the responses would have been if it was a male waiter flirting with a female customer.

Haha no one interesting Quim, honest

It wouldn't bother me tbh OP. In fact I'd find it funny

I don't think I'd notice tbh. DH would never be interested in a waitress anyway so who cares?