To stop frequenting this restaurant?

[FannyTheFlamingo]

DP and I go to a particular restaurant once a week or so and have been for a while. Everyone there knows us, makes us feel very welcome, always willing to change a dish for fussy DP etc.. But there's this one waitress, who is so flirty with DP it's pissing me off and bordering on embarrassing. DP is completely blind to it (so he says) and I'm not worried about him reciprocating but sometimes I feel it's a bit disrespectful to me. The last time we went there, she went into the kitchen to get 2 new members of staff out to look at him with a 'that's who I've been telling you about' gesture. AIBU to not want to go there anymore or am I being over sensitive?

I can actually have my pick of men {wink}

Rhiwrites I think that's it.

Just because you can't afford to be quite so picky doesn't mean that my husband can't.

He's obviously not that picky.

So what do you do, Dina, that makes you so worthy?

No, it's not about decency, he's just about above that. The man is very successful and very intelligent, there isn't really much a full time waitress could offer him and he wouldn't see a woman unless he had genuine interest in her because he's not a dick

Do you really believe no women with some intelligence has ever been a waitress?

Look, you average waitress would not be interested in someone who is long term unemployed right? becuase nobody employed has ever dated someone without a job

Likewise, someone with a PhD wouldn't be interested in a career waitress 😂😂😂

@MyheartbelongstoG So can goady Dina!!

I don't actually think DP looks like a famous person, so that's not the reason with the waitress, otherwise she would've mentioned it.

Just because you can't afford to be quite so picky doesn't mean that my husband can't

He's obviously not that picky

You took the words out my mouth!

Dina, do you not realise that many waitresses are not "career" waiting staff? I think you'd probably find some of them rather interesting if you met them outside of the restaurant, as might your DH.

I currently know a waiter who is working a few hours to fund himself while he finishes his second poetry collection and a waitress who's writing up a PhD in a niche scientific field, but funding has run out. Both are incredibly interesting to talk to, both are likely to do very well for themselves in the future, and neither is crass enough to make half-baked assumptions about people they don't know.

Stop going or complain to the manager about her. I'd complain - it would be a shame to not be able to go to your favourite restaurant.

Dina is just the PoundShop Katie Hopkins.

Dina has some very interesting views on social standing. I've become quite familiar with them based on some recent threads. Have a quick search. It's really quite something.

I wouldn't worry op.

If the waitress were a little closer to home like a friend then I wouldn't like it one bit mind.

I would find it hilarious, she sounds very immature, my DH is often chatted up, doesn't worry me in the least, used to it after all these years as he is attractive. I know he wouldn't dream of reciprocating. I wouldn't worry about it in the least.

I bet she has a lot to offer- she probably can spot snobs a mile off, is good at multitasking and is probably plotting to seduce your husband

Just be hopeful she doesn't spit in your food

I bloody hate snobs

I'm off to have a look Melvin.

Surely Dina is not for real. But if she is then and her half deserve each other.

@blameitonthebipolar I'm hoping that was aimed at Dina and not me?!

Ignoring Dina being a goady twat odd...

I would probably carry on going personally OP as it wouldn't really bother me BUT it obviously bothers you and therefore I would advise you choose somewhere else.

Are you sure she's not just flirty with men generally?

I remember once watching my DP get served at a bar and I could not believe how flirty the (very attractive) barmaid was being, tossing her hair around, giggling, leaning close to talk to him etc. It really annoyed me and I'm not a jealous person by nature, I remember asking DP what they were laughing about together. Amway I soon realized that she was like that with practically every man she served, it was just her way of interacting I think, she probably didnt even realise she was doing it.

@EverythingEverywhere1234 I think if it was subtle it would be fine. It only started to get to me after she said 'are you going to show me your white bits' when we came back from holiday! I asked DP how he'd react if it was a waiter saying it to me. He agreed it wouldn't be appropriate.

Of course it was flamingo sorry I should have made that clearer

Seriously though, if the waitress is being so obvious and making you feel uncomfortable then several of the options are to speak to the manager, check what night she doesn't work!, ask to be served by someone else or the hardest one ( for me ) would be to ask her to stop doing it, hard I know.

You shouldn't have to stop going because of her.

OP, I am so confused. You said to me "
@RhiWrites So when people said 'look, isn't that X over there with his missus and kids', I was actually imagining it!? I'm not an idiot!"

And now you've said: "I don't actually think DP looks like a famous person, so that's not the reason with the waitress"

These are contradictory statements. Who was the X that the people in the theme park compared him too? Is this person famous? Why is it impossible the waitress could also know this famous person?

it doesn't make for a very pleasant evening does it?

I don't know that I'd be particularly jealous, but I just wouldn't want this kind of shit going on in a place I'm going to eat with my family. It's all childish and ridiculous and off-putting.

"Oooh lets go to the local for dinner, where the waitress/waiter drools all over you and pretends i don't exist." said NO ONE EVER!

Well that is a weird, very over-friendly thing to say flamingo. Tbh I think you should really just go somewhere else and give it no more headspace.