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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell her to shove off?!

98 replies

lastqueenofscotland · 29/05/2017 15:52

A few weeks ago while I assume he was drunk as it was at about 2am an old colleague sent me a few messages basically saying he fancied me. I saw them the next morning and pointed out he was married and that it was inappropriate. Nothing else. He's not contacted me since.

I've just had a text from his wife and Jesus she's making out that I am some sort of man eater etc reading me the riot act, telling me to back off etc etc. I don't know what he's said to her as if she'd seen the messages she'd get a clear idea...

Wibu to point out I am not remotely interested in her husband and perhaps he is the one she needs to be talking to?!?

OP posts:
MickeyRooney · 29/05/2017 15:54

Ignore.
She sounds bats. No reasoning with her, I'd imagine.
Keep all the texts though.

ShinyGirl · 29/05/2017 15:54

Reply..Read the messages, I'll just wait right here for your apology.

SayNoToCarrots · 29/05/2017 15:54

No, ywnbu

Pinkheart5917 · 29/05/2017 15:54

Some women are just like that. It's easier to blame the "man eater" women than to look at the man they share there bed with!

She's probably best ignored, you can't argue with stupid

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 29/05/2017 15:55

If you still have the messages, I would screenshot them and send them to her.

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 29/05/2017 15:55

Sounds like he has spouted a load of sh*t at her... I would only message her once, being reasonably polite. Then block and don't engage and leave them to it.

kissmethere · 29/05/2017 16:01

Send her his messages! Why should you get the blame.

NoncommittalToSparkleMotion · 29/05/2017 16:04

Send her the messages. Not like she'll be reasoned with, but it'll be hard for her to garner any sympathy from others.

mumofthemonsters808 · 29/05/2017 16:05

I think it's a defence mechanism for handling a player husband, you believe all his lies and spray your territory by attacking the woman. No response is the best response, but I'd have to screen shot the conversation and send it to her.He'll worm his way out of it and all will be well until the next incident.

PurpleDragon76 · 29/05/2017 16:08

Sounds like she wouldn't accept the truth anyway. Did he give her your number? If you have the messages I would forward them. Then a message saying you won't enter into further discussion.

HildaOg · 29/05/2017 16:09

Screenshot the messages and send them to her asking how you could have responded any more appropriately. Tell her to reserve her anger for her wannabe cheating husband.

Jupitar · 29/05/2017 16:09

I'd reply, "piss off im not that desperate and I wouldn't touch him with a bargepole 😷"

GrinGrin

SheSaidHeSaid · 29/05/2017 16:11

Definite screenshot and send her the messages. Shes being played for a fool.

Original poster
lastqueenofscotland · 29/05/2017 16:11

Purple that's a good point I've no idea how she got my number Confused

Jupitar my friends suggestion was "piss off love I'm not remotely bothered about your fat husband" but I'm not sure that would go down well Hmm

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 29/05/2017 16:14

Are the texts in the usual conversation format? If so just screenshot and send to her - she'll be able to see times, dates and what was said.

Jupitar · 29/05/2017 16:15

my friends suggestion was "piss off love I'm not remotely bothered about your fat husband" but I'm not sure that would go down well hmm

Sounds perfect, 👍🏻 If she still doesn't get the hint then forward his messages

FatOldBag · 29/05/2017 16:22

Definitely send her the messages and point out his contact was out of the blue. Adding "I await your apology" is a great idea, haha!

SheSaidHeSaid · 29/05/2017 16:22

Definitely add the 'I'll await your apology' after sending screenshots Grin

Original poster
lastqueenofscotland · 29/05/2017 16:23

Fat that is a great idea Grin

OP posts:
Liska · 29/05/2017 16:23

How about "It's annoying enough getting random unsolicited messages from your husband, without you joining in. I'd appreciate if you could both bugger off, as I wouldn't touch either of you with a bargepole." Then block.

MaisyPops · 29/05/2017 16:24

Screen shot the conversations which prove you aren't interested. Send them to her.
Send a final message saying you have zero interest in her husband you would appreciate it if she left you well alone.

khajiit13 · 29/05/2017 16:24

I'd have to reply. I pity her tbh

GeekyWombat · 29/05/2017 16:24

I'd definitely be confused / interested in how she got your number. If she'd been snooping in his messages to get it she'd have read the messages and know she has nothing to worry about. So how HAS she got it? If he gave it to her, why? Especially when nothing has happened!

honeyroar · 29/05/2017 16:25

Id send your friend's message with screenshots oh his texts and "no wonder he's trying to cheat, you nutter!".

(Not really! I'd send the screenshots with "I'm not interested, as you can see you're shouting at the wrong person.")

TheMysteriousJackelope · 29/05/2017 16:26

Screenshot the messages and send them to her and say that you will wait for her apology as her last communication to you. Once you get that block her. If she ever contacts you again, inform her that the next communication will be forwarded to the company HR department as sexual harassment from her DH and flat out threatening behavior from her. They can probably do little about it but it sounds good.