AIBU to send DS into school wearing this masterpiece for comic relief?

[TaffetaMuttonfudge]

My DS (4) has crazy hat day tomorrow for comic relief and I thought I'd be inventive and make him a paper mache volcano hat. Tinsel to be added to create a lava effect, and red paint also will be added for lava streams etc, and another coat of the brown paint but I'm slightly worried about the current effect. Does anyone else think that it looks slightly.....suspect???

Should I go back to the drawing board while I still have time and credibility?

Hmm you don't want him to look like a dickhead...

As long as he won't be bothered by the chorus of "Good morning shit head!", it should be fine

Just joking OP. You've put a lot of effort in. I'm sure he'll look fab.

Haha, thanks both - exactly what I thought!!

I'm sure with some red lava painted on it will be fine.

Can you add some trees/greenery to make it bit less - um - turd like?

I'm very impressed with the effort. Yes it looks a bit like a penisturd right now, but get some red and yellow wax crayons and melt them over it. Job bie 's a goodun!

I think even with trees and lava you might struggle to save it without a fair bit of effort! (Sorry!)
It needs to be much wider at the bottom (I think the biggest problem is that it doesn't look volcano shaped).
Try to paint it in a slightly lighter brown too. At the moment it looks like sometimes been a bit constipated!

If it makes you feel any better you can totally get your own back on me in a couple of weeks when I have to make two Easter bonnets for school!!

Sorry, but one look at it and I almost spat my blueberry and lemon curd muffin all over the screen. Which would have probably resulted in a similar colour to the one in the picture, plus or minus a shade of purple.
It looks like a mummified erected penis.
But I'm sure with the added effects it will be all fine.

mummified erect penis

I wouldn't put bushes at the base, it really won't help the rotten knob look!
Also wouldn't lava make it look like an infected mummified cock?

Can you make the base wider so it looks more "classic" volcano shape?
Then add some palm trees and then the lava??

The

Have no idea where the extra 'the' came from!

So just me that thinks it looks like a giant butt plug then?

slinks away with her dirty mind

Sorry, it really does look like a rotten knob.

And I'm worried that if you put thing "spewing" out of it that it will look like a rotten knob trying to be revived.

Can you widen the base as others have said - make it more triangular shaped?

Wow, that's quite......something

Thank you all for making me laugh, actually have tears rolling down my face right now. I don't think it's saveable, but I shall complete it just for you lot.

I cannot send him to school looking like a gorilla's bellend.

Placemarking for the photo of the finished article - it's looking pretty stupendous already!

i am crying with laughter at 'penisturd' - thanks OP. This has made my morning!

Oooh the melting of the wax crayons is a brilliant idea

No, that'd be two of us, emochild

OP,

I applaud your efforts and creative vision. Truly.

But please reassure us the...er...volcano doesn't issue forth with live bicarb+vinegar eruptions, too??? That may send my hysteria over the edge...

Placemarking purely to see the finished effort

Oh dear.

Can you cut it? The top 3/8ths or so would be fine and the crayons are a brilliant idea.

Actually I looked at it and thought " wtf is that" . I was imagining a little kids head poking out the top and their little legs out the bottom, with their arms neatly tucked inside.

I genuinely thought you wished to send him to school dressed like a little shit.😂

Took me a moment to realise it was a hat...

That is immense. I think you should sell it to a Danish museum as Tollund Man's morning wood.

Artist's....what?

Oh dear. Suggest a paper pirate hat...

Please report back in 10 years OP when every last scarp of enthusiasm has been beaten out of you by countless world fucking book days and mad fucking crazy hat day

In the meantime though, it's a top effort!