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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think nhs school height / weight check is useless

319 replies

Ellieboolou27 · 21/01/2017 08:17

Dd is 4.5 she's 3ft 7" and weighs 3st 9lb

The school did the height and weight check a few weeks ago and have sent a letter saying she is very overweight and they would like me to come in to discuss healthy eating.

I'm really shocked as dd is far from being very overweight
She does tap, swimming and multi sports weekly, as a family we eat normal family meals, she wears size 5-6 clothes, 6-7 in some shops like primark where they come up small.

She's certainly not skinny, but most certainly not very overweight!

I think this bmi checker is shit, according to the NHS online bmi checker my dh is obese, he is 6ft 2" and weighs 16st but is an ex body builder so is a big guy with not an ounce of fat on him.

Feeling awful Sad

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Reddishface · 21/01/2017 08:23

People can sometimes be in denial that their children are overweight

Helspopje · 21/01/2017 08:25

You are
For some (perhaps not you, but yup, those stats do suggest your dd is in need) it is a wake up call that things need to be adjusted.

Rixera · 21/01/2017 08:26

People with extreme amounts of muscle (bodybuilders) can't rely on BMI.
But if your daughter's BMI is overweight and she wears clothes at least one, sometimes two sizes too big, maybe it bears thinking about.

BlahBlahBland · 21/01/2017 08:29

It's not the most accurate, but it's a useful tool which many parents ignore.

My nephew is very overweight, probably obese. His school check revealed this and instead of taking it on the chin they have decided that it doesn't work, he can't possibly be fat because he does xyz sports, it's a bit of puppy fat.
He's 8 and wears size 13-14 trousers to fit his waist, if the legs aren't rolled up they go out nearly a foot beyond his toes.

backtowork2015 · 21/01/2017 08:29

With those measurements she is overweight, but at least now you can address it and if she is in a regular exercise habit then half the job is done, you just need to take a honest look at food now. If your husband is an ex body builder then surely he shouldn't be so heavy now? The muscle mass doesn't last forever. My dh us the same height and keeps himself very fit and is 3 st lighter, he is a broad build too nit a slum athletic type

backtowork2015 · 21/01/2017 08:30

Not a slim athletic type ..... silly phone!

BlahBlahBland · 21/01/2017 08:31

As another example, we kept being told how skinny our son is, how we can't be feeding him, when he was weighed and measured he was average height and weight.
Chunky is becoming the norm.

Witchend · 21/01/2017 08:31

I had a friend who was school nurse doing those, and she said the biggest indicator a child was badly overweight was... That the parents refused to give permission to be weighed.

Sirzy · 21/01/2017 08:34

Many parents bury their heads in the sand about these things sadly. Meaning rather than making small changes when they are young it becomes a bigger problem as they get older and harder to tackle.

SorrelSoup · 21/01/2017 08:35

We're about to face this and we're not going to like the result. Ds is the tallest in his class and has his dad's rugby player build: broad and muscular, but at the same time he's so tall and slender, long , slim endless legs. We can see his ribs clearly, front and back. No moobs etc. He comes up very overweight/obese. So I guess it's how they handle it with us...

There are some genuinely overweight children in his year though...

megletthesecond · 21/01/2017 08:36

BMI is fairly accurate tbh. Lots of people have forgotten what a healthy body looks like. Along with vanity sizing it's easy to think someone isn't overweight when they really are.

As a family you'll need to change diet and routines so her weight, and your DH's weight, doesn't become more of a problem.

AyeAmarok · 21/01/2017 08:37

There are a lot of these threads at the moment. People do seem to be in denial when their DC are overweight.

MuseumGardens · 21/01/2017 08:39

The bmi checker isn't wrong, but it's easy to let kids get a bit overweight nowadays so you are not alone. The good thing is there's loads of time to make a few improvements to get your dd back to a healthy weight. Perhaps cutting back on unhealthy snacks and replacing with healthier ones. I know my dc have a few too many unhealthy snacks. Good luck.

Pineappletastic · 21/01/2017 08:40

She's certainly not skinny, but most certainly not very overweight

You should be able to see a child's ribs, so if she isn't 'skinny' she is overweight.

Reddishface · 21/01/2017 08:40

You said your husband is an ex bodybuilder. He could quite possibly be overweight too. Highly unlikely there is not an ounce of fat on him, everyone has fat in their body, we need it.

There was another recent thread on here of a parent not convinced their child was overweight. You can post a picture without her face showing of course to get people's reaction if that might help you

Artandco · 21/01/2017 08:41

But she is overweight

3ft 7 is 109 cm
3stone 9 is 24.7kg

As a comparison my almost 7 year old is 122cm, and 22kg . So she's 13cm shorter but almost 3kg (6.6lbs) heavier

TalkingofMichaelAngel0 · 21/01/2017 08:45

Yea your child is over weight. You need to address your portion sizes and what food she is given regularly. No matter what exercise she is doing, if she is over fed she will be over weight.
Your dh is 6 feet 2 and -6 stone is also over weight. An ex body-builder, so NOT body buidling now? So it isnt muscle. Is he really skin and bone? Be honest.

What clothes size are you op?

Me and my chikdren (6 and 5) eat our meals off large side plates, rather than adult plates. That helps soth portion control. We have fruit or yoghurt aS dessert, rather than seconds. My 6 feet 3 husband will eat considerably more (normal plate, then seconds of he is still hungry) and is too fat around gis stomach atm and is considerably lighter than 16 stone!

bruffin · 21/01/2017 08:45

the range for "healthy" weight is huge, so to come up as overweight she must be heavier that about 90% of the population for her age and height.

Introvertedbuthappy · 21/01/2017 08:48

I'm afraid she is overweight - she's 3lbs heavier than my 8 year old son, just for comparison, who is slim, but not underweight. He is also very athletic, sporty etc. It will probably be down to portion sizes.

bruffin · 21/01/2017 08:48

from the nhs calculator she is 98th centile so actually bordering on obese

backtowork2015 · 21/01/2017 08:50

Sorrel soup the bmi calculator takes into account height. It also takes into account a broad range of builds, there is a range of normal. If your ds is not overweight he won't be reported as overweight. Children are not muscular to the point where the bmi doesn't work

SquinkiesRule · 21/01/2017 08:50

Listen to the BMI she is overweight, it's a lot easier to sort it now than as she gets older.
It may be as simple as portion sizes if she is very active.

Introvertedbuthappy · 21/01/2017 08:51

My son is also 20cm taller but 3lbs lighter.

Crumbs1 · 21/01/2017 08:51

She's below 50 centipede for height and above 96th for weight. Sorry but she is really very fat. My daughter weighed less than that at 9 years old - although she is a tiny dancer. You need to get a plan together - if you are fat too, you need to do it together. Cut out all snacks - three good meals a day is plenty. By good I mean nutrionally sound not large. Lots of vegetables to fill up on. Give her school lunches.
Ask to speak to school nurse or go to GP for proper advice and support. It is much easier now than later. You would be doing her a favour in terms of friendship, health, self confidence.

Artandco · 21/01/2017 08:52

6ft 2 and 16 stone is also overweight. At that height weight is recommended 13.2 stone max to be at top end of healthy.