To think nhs school height / weight check is useless

[Ellieboolou27]

Dd is 4.5 she's 3ft 7" and weighs 3st 9lb

The school did the height and weight check a few weeks ago and have sent a letter saying she is very overweight and they would like me to come in to discuss healthy eating.

I'm really shocked as dd is far from being very overweight
She does tap, swimming and multi sports weekly, as a family we eat normal family meals, she wears size 5-6 clothes, 6-7 in some shops like primark where they come up small.

She's certainly not skinny, but most certainly not very overweight!

I think this bmi checker is shit, according to the NHS online bmi checker my dh is obese, he is 6ft 2" and weighs 16st but is an ex body builder so is a big guy with not an ounce of fat on him.

Feeling awful

You can tell from that photo that she is overweight OP. Her fingers are chubby and her legs look quite large. I'd use this as an opportunity to look at portion size and snacks, I doubt she will notice a gradually reduction in the amount of food she gets.

OP says she feels awful. If she was in denial then she won't be now, but OP at least you are now on a position to change. sounds like DD does lots of exercise, which is great, so just look at food as others have said.

I have the opposite. one of my 10yr old twins is 131cm and 4st. I was so worried about him being skinny and small that I called the school nurse, who confirmed he is on 2nd percentile for both but that they only worry when there is a 2 percentile difference. His twin is on the 9th for height and 25th for weight yet eats healthier!

BMI is a blunt tool but it's not that blunt

She measures overnight, she looks overweight, you need to entertain the possibility that she is overweight.

It is very, very common to think that overweight people aren't. The population is much bigger than it used to be and our perceptions are skewed. Did you ever see the side by side pictures of the two actors who played Augustus Gloop in the two Charlie and The Chocolate Factory film? Our ideas about weight have changed enormously.

I think what Auntie means is that she's in silhouette in her tiptoes - a standard way to make people look slimmer than they are.

Her waist and upper arm in particular look quite plump. It's hard to see much else from that angle though.

It's nothing to take personally, its just a medical check up that shows something needs adjusting to get back on track.

I've just done the NHS bmi checker for my dd. The difference between very overweight and healthy is 4lbs. The results made me think she was 4 stones overweight. She's still a very toddler ish 3, but I get that people say you can't rely on a growth spurt and that weight could continue to increase. I find it upsetting as we were brought up on coke and the deep fat fryer; I've gone the complete opposite way with my dc.

And that it is very useful at the population level.

BMI is completely useless at a human level.

Ellieboolou27, she looks fine to me.

Rixera also said exactly what I was thinking looking at the picture. Her waist and upper arms are 'big' for a four year old. So are what you can see of her thighs.

Children this age should be skinny. She isn't.

Gently take it in hand now and look hard at what you're feeding her and how much.

When BMI is rubbish, the functional measures work well - can she run a mile in under 15 minutes, can she do the monkey bars?

Eh? That won't tell you if a child is overweight or not, just if they are fit or have strong arms. Being fit and being fat are not mutually exclusive, especially in children.

Meh. My 5 yr old DD is apparently 'very overweight'. She is definitely on the chubby side, but she is also very strong - can do proper push ups etc. She eats a healthy, varied diet, gets plenty of exercise, and fits into clothes her age perfectly. Obviously I shall keep an eye on it, but I am not overly concerned.

Also I'm not in denial, I said I think that saying she is VERY overweight is ridiculous.
Also i put a thread on mumsnet a few months ago about me complaining to the school about the cereals they use in breakfast club, think coco pops and Frosties, I had a meeting with the head as I thought it was awful breakfast choices, it's not as if I've got my head in the sand, just the school sends me a letter to state she is VERY overweight, and unless I had made a formal complaint to head about the crap cereals they offered, they would still be shovelling bowls of chocolate boulders down kids necks in their breakfast club!

I will ask for her pic to be removed as the nasty sarcastic remarks are rearing up now sirzy

Thanks for the advise from the sensible mumsnetters, will reduce snacks and treats and stick to the 3 meals, my mum has her 3 days a week after school, I'm thinking she maybe is having too many "nanny treats"

can she do the monkey bars?

My DS is 5'11" and 9 stone and he couldn't do the monkey bars for 2 seconds!

On a side note I remember being measured at school. I was 10, a size 8 adult feet, 5ft 2/3ish (163cm) and weighed 9 stone. That made me 'very overweight' but upon checking and adult with the same proportions is described as healthy.

It led to me having ednos when I entered high school later that year. I still wore age 12/13 clothes at the age of 16 as a result.

my mind works in metric so I struggle with weights in stone/lb, but my 6 year old son has always been in the normal range for bmi and he weighs almost 19kg now which looking at charts makes him 1st lighter than your dd which would makes her overweight.

I do think that we're so used to seeing children getting bigger and bigger that we are not noticing it anymore, I assumed he'd be underweight because we always have to buy slim fit trousers for him - ones for his age fall off and a size bigger are too long, for me it seems like clothes have gotten bigger with them, he's not that skinny and yet most clothes always seem much too generous.

I was also a good 5 inches taller.

In that photo she doesn't look only 4nand with a big baggy top no one can really comment as all we see is draping material.

For a baggy top her upper arms fill the sleeves and her leggings look scrunched up/too long/uncomfortable, are they a bigger/taller size to fit?

We have noticed ds(12) who was always skinny, since starting secondary is now filling out, probably due to not playing football constantly at school as it is no longer cool. accepting it and putting in subtle changes sooner rather than later is best.

One thing if you don't like school poking nose in this way sign the form to say that your daughter is to not be involved in any of these kind of check like weight height dental one etc etc,no test/exam no letter from school to bother you

What have I posted that is "nasty and sarcastic"?

"BMI is completely useless at a human level."

It's as stated above, the cheap and cheerful screening. Not useless.

If proper and specific individual investigations show there is no issue then obviously things are fine for that human. But most people who are flagged by the screening are simply overweight. Which might not be a problem if a 'fit and fat' DC, but does have longer term implications for health.

Parents are given info about their DC. It's up to them to decide what to do about it - whether that's making changes, not making changes, seeking more detailed individual advice, or trying to rubbish the whole system.

Elliboolou - your dd does look overweight from the picture you posted. She doesn't look unhealthy, just overweight. I think you are taking the letter too personally. Overweight, even significantly overweight, does not mean lazy, wheezy and unfit, at imminent risk of premature death, or unattractive, it simply means you either eat more than is healthy for you in the very long term, or eat the wrong sort of food. Denying the truth is unhelpful, as would be overreacting and putting your dd on a starvation diet.

my mum has her 3 days a week after school, I'm thinking she maybe is having too many "nanny treats"

Our kids' gps are terrible for this! It's not like they get a pudding after their meal; it's a constant stream of crap from the minute they walk in to their houses, then a "they didn't want their dinner" or "we just had cakes and rice pudding, we didn't bother with dinner". Ridiculous.

Wow. I started writing my post, then had to come back to finish it later. I hadn't read all of the comments on this thread. There are some really fucking bitchy remarks. Asking how much the OP weighs? Insinuating that she must be overweight? Calling a little, perfectly normal girl fat? Are you serious?

OP: your daughter looks perfectly normal in that picture. Ignore some of these comments. All kids are different - yes, the majority do tend to be on the slender side, but not all. I was a chubby kid, and am now (and have been for years) a small UK size 8. I hate this obsession with weight. It insinuates that a low weight is more important than a healthy diet and plenty of exercise.

"One thing if you don't like school poking nose in this way"

Point of detail, the checks are carried out in schools but not by the school. If you want to opt out yes you need to refuse consent, but that is to the public health bit if the NHS.

We got the dreaded school nurse phone call after dd2 was weighed and measured when she was in reception. I was horrified and like you huffed and puffed about how she was perfectly normal and how well I fed her and how much excercise she got and how her dad was big but definitely not overweight. Blah blah blah. Truth was the child was just overweight and I was just deluding myself Go figure.
Took the matter into my own hands - improved diet, increased activity. Not rocket science. Dd2 has just had Yr6 review and happily sits in the healthy range.

And she dosent look overweight no