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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to finally leave mumsnet?

116 replies

Spero · 14/12/2016 18:47

No. I don't think I am.

Farewell then mumsnet.

You used to be a place of interesting and feisty debate.

I will miss that.

OP posts:
PerfumeAndCatsAndBooks · 14/12/2016 19:59

I have been a MNer for over a decade and used to eyeroll at the "MN ain't what it used to be threads", but recently I feel very much that it has changed, and not for the better.

I think the lifting of threads has contributed. I understand fully that it's a public forum blah blah, so I don't mean the lifting per se, but the knock on effects of this - namely a huge influx of knobheads, the NCing (especially for controversial threads) that has ensued as people try to protect their privacy, and then the ensuing troll calling as people assume Ncers are just newbies on a wind up.

It has really altered the feel of the site and I also agree with PP that the moderation also seems to have altered. It's also very disappointing that so many long term MNers have left over the disablism issue. I no longer post about my DCs SN as it's so identifying and I don't feel secure about getting support, sadly. I also think there are a number of very recognisable PBPs doing the rounds again, sadly, and I don't have as much faith in the reporting system as I used to.

I think it's inevitable to some degree that MN has changed as it has got so much bigger over the last few years, but the change seems to have accelerated recently.

I have hugely reduced my posting, NC frequently and am very seriously considering just leaving too, TBH. I have tried to just post about cats and books and Christmas but it's so difficult!

It's a shame as MN has really been such a big part of my life for so long. It just feels so...snarky though Sad

creakyknees13 · 14/12/2016 19:59

But a low point for me was on a change of title on a thread about Santa being real

Oh my God, I missed that too. I don't even know where to start on how utterly pathetic that is. The whole Santa and magic and believing thing on here is annoying as hell, but I guess it only comes round once a year, so I can bear it. But yeah, change the thread about Santa in case your kid sees it, but leave the one saying 'AIBU to want to fucking murder cocklodger DH?'. Makes sense if you live in a privileged middle class bubble I guess, where the worst thing that could happen to you would be your 12 year old discovering that a magical fat man in a red suit isn't real.

creakyknees13 · 14/12/2016 20:06

I made a comment about Vernon Kay's not so private life as it's been reported in the news. It was in relation to the Tess Daly thread. It was deleted

I have also noticed that there are certain celebs who we are not allowed to slag off ever. They do seem to get hysterical over nonsensical stuff.

To MNHQ- VK is a dog.

BantyCustards · 14/12/2016 20:09

Please don't Spero

You are a voice of reason.

Viviennemary · 14/12/2016 20:15

Well, in this case, Viviennemary, it happens to be true.

Well I am glad to hear that. Sorry I was not very gracious but I have had a bad day. Still it did make me smile that Santa not being real was the worst thing a little innocent could read on MN.

PurpleDaisies · 14/12/2016 20:18

Here's the Santa thread for anyone that missed it...
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/2788094-Questions-about-Santa-Title-edited-by-MNHQ

BoreOfWhabylon · 14/12/2016 20:18

Made me smile too Xmas Grin

Shenanagins · 14/12/2016 20:19

That's a shame as I'm sure there are a lot of people who have benefited from your advice in difficult circumstances.

Spero · 14/12/2016 20:20

Interval time! PurpleDaisies, your comment about 'little eyes' has just made me guffaw loudly in crowded auditorium and mortified my daughter, so thank you for that.

So, despite all the anal clenching tweeness of the moderation process at times - and yes, I have also had an email asking me 'not to be so mean' - there would appear to be life in the old dog yet.

Okay, how about I start a sober, serious, completely non goady continuation thread? (And see how long that lasts)

Thank you seriously for the kind words. It was of course precisely why I started this, my neediness is a vast hole that will never be filled. But thanks for trying.

OP posts:
Wookiecookies · 14/12/2016 20:21

They did what? Newsflash MNHQ. Santa is NOT real. Get over it. Xmas Hmm

DoItTooJulia · 14/12/2016 20:22

Spero don't go! I've read your contributions to various threads over the years and I actually think you're amazing.

I'll be sorry to see you go.

PurpleDaisies · 14/12/2016 20:22

Oops! Sorry. Grin

Hope you're enjoying the performance and glad you're not disappearing just yet.

OlennasWimple · 14/12/2016 20:23

Of all the crappiness you have experienced because of using this site, please don't let a shonky decision by MNHQ be the thing that makes you quit Sad

BoreOfWhabylon · 14/12/2016 20:23

Good decision Spero - welcome back Xmas Grin

In the thread in site stuff MNHQ say you are welcome to start a continuation thread

Spero · 14/12/2016 20:28

I have had a bash at continuation thread but traitorous IPad won't link and concert is threatening to resume.

I can't promise what follows will be safe for 'little eyes' but I hope that others will grasp the distinction between challenge/debate/dialogue and being a goady fucker for the sake of it.

OP posts:
KatieScarlett · 14/12/2016 20:29

You are one of the good ones Spero. So glad you are staying.

Losgunna · 14/12/2016 20:33

Oh Spero please don't go!

We need more intelligent articulate posters like you who don't get riled by actual goady shit

This will be a duller place without youSad

Losgunna · 14/12/2016 20:35

Ah sorry cross postBlush

So glad you've decided to stay, you bring an AWFUL lot to those debates.

Somerville · 14/12/2016 20:38

I'm pleased you're restarting a continuation thread, the first covered some important and interesting ground.

Fingers crossed for you that the second half of the concert is only singing and no beginner violinists. I always take ear plugs to such things just in case.

Fiderer · 14/12/2016 20:44

You wrote so much about adoption and child protection and I had no idea about how it works, or doesn't.

I'd welcome an informed poster, tbh, and wish them to stay.

lovelearning · 14/12/2016 20:48

I'd welcome an informed poster, tbh, and wish them to stay.

I second that.

Italiangreyhound · 14/12/2016 20:52

Please stay Spero

UnbornMortificado · 14/12/2016 20:54

I wrote on the thread it was a continuation not a TAAT. I thought the first thread was interesting reading and very informative fwiw.

Some posters are very report happy at the minute.

HarveySchlumpfenburger · 14/12/2016 21:17

Glad you have decided to stay. Mumsnet needs more well informed posters at the moment and we don't need to lose the ones we have.

It's a shame so many people are quite so trigger happy with the report button.

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