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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To rehome my cats?

129 replies

billyholiday · 12/09/2016 22:41

I've had them for 6 months and due to unforeseen circumstances I can't afford to keep them any longer. I love them and believe me it will hurt a lot to see them go but I'm struggling to find any other option. One of them was ill over the weekend (she's fine now) and it made me realise that if something went wrong and one of them needed expensive vet treatments etc then I won't be able to afford it. It's making me miserable.

AIBU to rehome them before I get even more attached?

OP posts:

caroloro · 12/09/2016 22:44

You were perhaps a bit silly to get them in the first place without thinking through the finances.....There's no NHS for cats (well actually there is, pdsa). Adult cats are very difficult to rehome, so unless you do it yourself, they will probably be put to sleep. Is it that you can't afford to feed them? Or the possibility of vet bills at some potential time in the future scares you?

Feminazi · 12/09/2016 22:46

You may qualify for the PDSA.

Also, could you afford pet insurance? If your cars are healthy then it's only a few quid a month.

But yes, YABU. You should have considered this before homing them.

TattyCat · 12/09/2016 22:50

Ditto what above posters have said. Try and get pet insurance first and if you really have to rehome, try and find someone you know rather than a rescue centre as they are chock full of cats needing homes.

I do wish people would take pet adoption more seriously and ensure that whatever the circumstance, they will always be able to afford to keep them. Rescue centres are full of animals that people have become bored of.

Middleoftheroad · 12/09/2016 22:51

Please check out PDSA options first. Six months is long enough for those cats to be attached to their home. YABU as three cats is a big responsibility. We do not have a third as we cannot afford one.

TattyCat · 12/09/2016 22:56

Yeah, but they're not fluffy kittens any more, are they?

strawberrypenguin · 12/09/2016 22:59

You need pet insurance to cover any big bills. Really cats aren't that expensive day to day. If you do rehome please do it responsibly.

SandyY2K · 12/09/2016 23:04

If you can't afford them contact the cats protection league to rehome them. Or I know a couple of cat charities in the London/ Herts/Beds area that would take them.

I'm a cat fosterer among many other things.

GinBunny · 12/09/2016 23:06

Oh Billy, I think others are being a bit harsh, if there were unforeseen circumstances then that's different to just deciding that you couldn't afford them because your circumstances have changed.
I am in a similar position due to my relationship breaking down and likely to lose my home. It's a shit decision to have to make. Can you keep them for now and see how things pan out? If you're attached then it's there, time won't change that.

idrinkandiknowthings · 12/09/2016 23:09

@ Tattycat "I do wish people would take pet adoption more seriously and ensure that whatever the circumstance, they will always be able to afford to keep them. Rescue centres are full of animals that people have become bored of"

In fairness to the OP, it's not a case of boredom, just lack of finances. The cats were taken out of love and at least they've had some happiness. Or perhaps you'd have preferred them to have lived out the rest of their lives in a rescue home box?

joangray38 · 12/09/2016 23:12

there is nothing to say they will be ill - my last. Cat was 19 when he died and only ever went to the vets for his boosters. Could you set up a money jar and put in any loose coins as a way of setting up a fund in case they are ill. Adult cats are so hard to rehome, when looking for a new cat some has been at their rescue for nearly a year

idrinkandiknowthings · 12/09/2016 23:13

Just as an aside - I like this forum. I like the fact that we're treated as adults and it's accepted that adults swear and get annoyed, without being sanctioned or given a wagging finger.

I would dearly love a "quote" facility, though, and even more a "like" button.

TattyCat · 12/09/2016 23:15

Or perhaps you'd have preferred them to have lived out the rest of their lives in a rescue home box?

Don't be silly. Do you have any idea how many animals are in rescue centres as a result of someone's 'change of circumstances'? Usually because either the animal is no longer a puppy/kitten or they find that actually, it takes up more time and money than first thought. They are sad, sad places and it's bloody heartbreaking to hear excuse after pathetic excuse. Unless the owner has died or the owner is emigrating then there is no excuse. Sorry, there just isn't. It should have been thought through properly before they were taken on.

Sick to death of people thinking these poor creatures are disposable.

ItsJustNotRight · 12/09/2016 23:17

Yes rehome them now. Cats can live a long time, mine are both nearly 18. Think long & hard before you get another pet, they are a long term commitment & medication/vets bills increase as they get older. Annual vaccinations, dental treatment, infected bites, ticks, fleas, worms are all common things that have to dealt with & cost money. Also I don't have anyone to mind them when I go away so have to pay cattery £10 per day. Add on cat food & litter & costs mount up. Dont take on this expense if you need the money for basics for yourself.pets are a luxury item.

Northernlurker · 12/09/2016 23:18

Get a grip op. You made a commitment to these animals. Get on with it.

MaddyHatter · 12/09/2016 23:19

Rubbish Tatty, what a load of Cobblers.

Peoples lives change, sometimes they have to move, and can't find anywhere that allows pets.

Sometimes people get sick and can't look after them

Sometimes people are made redundant or homeless and simply can't afford to feed themselves, never mind pets.

Life goes on, sometimes rehoming is the best option for all, especially if the alternative is the cats end up getting neglected.

Madeyemoodysmum · 12/09/2016 23:20

If you re home now they will likely get a home as they are still considered in kittenhood if they are 6months. You can get a lifetime vac plan for £99 with pets at home and mine are insured for only £6 each a month. If you are income support or similar you may get pdsa help. Good luck what ever you decide

Yorkieheaven · 12/09/2016 23:21

That's difficult for you op. There are animal charities that re home adult cats and I disagree it's hard to re home adult cats in general.

Mage your choice. You arnt abandoning them if you drop them at a charity but think hard if you can keep them so. Lots of cats never trouble the vet. None of mine have and lived to grand old ages.

GinBunny · 12/09/2016 23:24

Yes, Tatty, I do understand because I have worked in animal rescue too. And I know all the excuses and lies that people give. But I find myself in a position where I will have to rehome my pets, not because they are an inconvenience or not cute anymore but because I am losing my home and can't take them with me. These things do happen and right now we don't know OP's circumstances.

TattyCat · 12/09/2016 23:31

These things do happen and right now we don't know OP's circumstances.

No, true. Sorry for being a bit knee jerky. Just ... it breaks my heart to see someone returning a pet after 24hrs because 'it won't settle'. They deserve better. Not an excuse, just a reason for my over-reaction.

Sorry Op.

Omgkitties · 13/09/2016 00:15

So everyone on this threads saying don't rehome them even though the OP may no longer be able to afford to give them the care that they deserve.

Yet on another thread everyone was saying get rid of the cats and dogs becuase the DP decided he didn't like them anymore.

For what it's worth, I love my cat to peices and would love another one or two hundred. It would break my heart to ever give her away but if I felt I could not longer afford to care for her and knew it was for the best I would find her a loving family. You have to do whatever you feel is best for your cats and you.

YourNewspaperIsShit · 13/09/2016 00:36

Where were the posters from this thread when I needed them, I've been told to that AIBU to want to keep mine

YourNewspaperIsShit · 13/09/2016 00:38

Oh just spotted your comment Omg Yeah that was me MN is odd sometimes it's so conflicting

Blueskyrain · 13/09/2016 08:14

When you adopt a pet, you are doing it in the knowledge they may live for 20 years, they may be ill, your life might change over that time. It's a lifetime commitment, and only in the most extreme circumstances I believe should anything come between that.

Circumstances change, but you knew that life wouldn't always stay the same when you adopted them, so I think you need to stand up to that promise.

If you really can't afford them, then rehome responsibly, but cats aren't expensive. Get decent insurance, you can probably cut expenditure elsewhere for this, and buy them cheap food if you have to.

Katinkka · 13/09/2016 08:35

Cat food is not expensive really, you made a commitment and need to get on with it.

You're being selfish and irresponsible.

Cocklodger · 13/09/2016 09:16

But we do know the relevant circumstances
I've had them for 6 months and due to unforeseen circumstances I can't afford to keep them any longer. I love them and believe me it will hurt a lot to see them go but I'm struggling to find any other option. One of them was ill over the weekend (she's fine now) and it made me realise that if something went wrong and one of them needed expensive vet treatments etc then I won't be able to afford it. It's making me miserable.
A change of circumstances? Fine.
You took on animals without insurance or the money to pay for an unexpected bill.
That isn't a change of circumstances. Thats just stupidity. Get yourself some insurance if you can afford it. I pay £30 a month for my 2 cats, and one has a health issue. If you cannot afford it you shouldn't have had the cats anyway and you should rehome them (And not get another pet for a very very long time)

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