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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think 7 & 8 year olds need car seats

214 replies

justalittlelemondrizzle · 02/05/2016 23:58

My 7 & 8yo dds use booster seats in the car. Ive been shocked recently with people not bothering to use them. Dds were taken out last week by a friend. I asked if I should get the dd's seats and they said its fine as their 6yo doesn't need one anymore so my dds will be fine as theyre taller than her. Luckily dd's insisted they wanted their seats so I avoided a potentially awkward convo. I'm not one to preach to people about their parenting.
Another friend gave my eldest a lift home the other day, when she was dropped off, I went to the car and she wasn't sat on a booster and neither was her dd or 6yo son!
I took dds friend out today and she got in the back in the middle seat with no seat, I had a spare seat in the front for her and she moved but said she hadnt sat in one of these for ages.
These are all different children btw and none of them are taller than my eldest who is 125cm.
Is this the norm? Are people just not that fussed or am I OTT?

OP posts:
CalleighDoodle · 03/05/2016 00:03

I assume you mean high back booster?! I dont get it either.

StickTheDMWhereTheSunDontShine · 03/05/2016 00:05

People are unbelievably lax about car seats, even for smaller kids.

Original poster
justalittlelemondrizzle · 03/05/2016 00:07

No their dc's all sit on the adult seat. 3 different families in a week.
Mine have the backless booster seats

OP posts:
lalalalyra · 03/05/2016 00:10

People are incredibly lax about car seats. I don't allow DH's cousin to take my children in her car anymore because she thinks car seats are for 'babies' and any insistence is seen as a slight on her driving. It's a shame because I don't take her kids places anymore either because I can't be doing with the point blank refusal to sit in boosters or wear 'stupid' seatbelts.

Mov1ngOn · 03/05/2016 00:10

Wow. I think backless boosters are about to be made illegal for under 12/125cm (which confuses me as that's not a 12 year old height!)

I thought you were going to be complaining about backless boosters! Not met people that don't use at all.

Original poster
justalittlelemondrizzle · 03/05/2016 00:14

My eldest is now over the height and weight for the new law on backless boosters. My youngest is the right weight and 3cm off being tall enough for the new rules so I think by Dec (I think that is when it comes in?) we will be alright but I was taken aback by all these people using nothing at all!

OP posts:
Idliketobeabutterfly · 03/05/2016 00:15

My niece is still on a booster at eleven years old. DS will be on a car seat until he isn't legally obligated to be in one.

AndNowItsSeven · 03/05/2016 00:17

I am taken aback you don't use a booster with a back " because it's not the law until December" that doesn't make it safe.

Original poster
justalittlelemondrizzle · 03/05/2016 00:20

Considering I only saw an article about the new laws 2 days ago I wasn't then going to rush out and by new seats for the sake of a few cm's. And I doubt many other people have either.

OP posts:
supposeitmightbe · 03/05/2016 00:24

I'm surprised you don't use high backed boosters! My 10 year old is still in a high backed booster even though she is the height and weight not to be because she still fits! I do know that there are children at 10 who are too broad to fit in but if your younger child isn't the right height you are just as irresponsible!

SucculentSoul · 03/05/2016 00:24

I'mean not surprised by it but I do think it is happening less and less. Here in Ireland kids have to use a booster until they are 150cm. Both my children(8&6) are in high back boosters,I prefer them to have the extra side impact protection. I always double check that they will have a booster when travelling in someone else car and would never allow one of the children's friend to travel with us without one.

FasterThanASnakeAndAMongoose · 03/05/2016 00:25

Yanbu. I'm constantly amazed at how lax some parents are when it comes to car seats.

Car seats are also one of the few things that I wouldn't consider buying secondhand, unless from a trusted friend obviously. So many people buy second hand car seats from strangers on the facebook sites. I know they're expensive but why would you risk it? Why would you take a stranger's word for it that it was fine?

I've also found out recently that car seats expire. I mentioned this to MIL, who has an old car seat in her car which gets used occasionally. It must be at least 15 years old. "I don't plan to crash! We hardly ever use it anyway!" she said.

I'd never let her put my kids in it.

Hannahfftl · 03/05/2016 00:27

I remember being about 6 and having a booster seat and being picked on by kids in my grandads Road for being a baby. Shame to see not much has changed in 20 years with people not bothering to use them.

FasterThanASnakeAndAMongoose · 03/05/2016 00:27

But in answer to your actual question, yes they should be in seats, ideally newish ones that you know the history of.

supposeitmightbe · 03/05/2016 00:27

Thinking about your post I'm always surprised that parents get them out of high backed boosters asap. I'm not sure why there needs to be this pressure to be first out of a car seat with no regard to safety.

Idliketobeabutterfly · 03/05/2016 00:30

I thought it was law until they were twelve or a certain height.

Original poster
justalittlelemondrizzle · 03/05/2016 00:30

Supposeitmightbe - I bought the seat that was recommended for their age when theyd outgrown their smaller seats. They were suitable from age 3 but my dds didnt use them till age 6. I dont think its irresponsible to be using a seat recommended for their age. And certainly isnt fair to be classing it as the same as the people who I have mentioned in my op.

Succulentsoul - yes I did have to coax dds friend into the booster today. She was having none of it at first.

OP posts:
FasterThanASnakeAndAMongoose · 03/05/2016 00:33

Yes - it's like extended rear facing thing. We bought an erf second seat for when dd outgrew her Pebble at 9 months. She's really tall and her torso was just too long for it. She's only just gone forward facing recently at 26 months. Her legs just weren't comfortable anymore.

So many people though seem to see outgrowing the first seat and going forward facing as a right of passage of some sort, and move them before it's strictly necessary. It's ridiculous.

FasterThanASnakeAndAMongoose · 03/05/2016 00:35

High back boosters offer side impact support. Why choose a basic booster which doesn't?

ChocolateStash · 03/05/2016 00:40

Yanbu. I've made it very clear to certain family members that it is a very "big deal", to use car seats, if they want to take my dc anywhere. I pay extra abroad, for high back car seats for dc, when we go on holidays. I can't believe in 2016, that some people are still not getting the,message about car sests for dc. There are so many serious really and road deaths every year, it seems crazy not to protect dc as best we can.

wasonthelist · 03/05/2016 00:48

My 8 yo is well over the height limit but still in high backed booster. It doesn't help that her pal from school's hipster Dad lets her (dd's friend) ride in the front of his Audi with no booster etc even though she's much shorter and therefore almost certainly illegal.

At least we have this stuff now - I am so old we rode in the back with no belts (and both parents chain smoking up front!)

Original poster
justalittlelemondrizzle · 03/05/2016 00:48

I remember as a child I used a booster until I was pretty old (short arse) I would have thought people would have been more on the ball nowadays. Most of dds friends have boosters and I have never had this issue before last week. Its just strange that all of a sudden ive come across 3 different lax families.

OP posts:
MadamDeathstare · 03/05/2016 01:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ericaequites · 03/05/2016 02:22

I was driving at 18 when I was still under 150 cm, and some of my short friends were doing so at 16. 150 cm is a ridiculously high standard for booster seats.
As for car seats expiring, it's better to use an old seat than none at all.

GreatFuckability · 03/05/2016 02:31

My MIL is under 150cm!
My understanding is that keeping a child who is too tall in a booster is also not safe. My DS is nearly 12. He is too short to not be in a booster technically. Yet in 3 weeks it'll be fine. So I don't make him as he's embarrassed about being so short as it is.