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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think 7 & 8 year olds need car seats

214 replies

justalittlelemondrizzle · 02/05/2016 23:58

My 7 & 8yo dds use booster seats in the car. Ive been shocked recently with people not bothering to use them. Dds were taken out last week by a friend. I asked if I should get the dd's seats and they said its fine as their 6yo doesn't need one anymore so my dds will be fine as theyre taller than her. Luckily dd's insisted they wanted their seats so I avoided a potentially awkward convo. I'm not one to preach to people about their parenting.
Another friend gave my eldest a lift home the other day, when she was dropped off, I went to the car and she wasn't sat on a booster and neither was her dd or 6yo son!
I took dds friend out today and she got in the back in the middle seat with no seat, I had a spare seat in the front for her and she moved but said she hadnt sat in one of these for ages.
These are all different children btw and none of them are taller than my eldest who is 125cm.
Is this the norm? Are people just not that fussed or am I OTT?

OP posts:
TheVanishingSAHM · 03/05/2016 06:17

That seems strange Mov1ng. My 6 year old was measured at the doctors yesterday, he is 127cm. I can't imagine him not being in a car seat. I always thought the height requirement was 135.

EdithWeston · 03/05/2016 06:32

The height requirement is 135cms (or age 12) at present.

I have to say I hadn't heard there were new rules in the offing for no-back boosters. Won't that just confuse people?

Bogburglar99 · 03/05/2016 06:53

Just googled and children under 125cm must be in high backs from December. Although if you already have a backless booster you can still legally use it which seems to make a bit of a nonsense of enforcement?!

In answer to your original question yes of course 7/8 year olds need car seats if they are under the legal limit which is 135cm. My 7 rising 8 is under 120cm and will possibly be in a car seat until they take their driving test Grin However I think the majority of 7/8 year olds would be under 135cm? I would never take one of their 7/8 year old friends in the car without checking with their parents that seat was needed, either.

DubiousCredentials · 03/05/2016 06:54

Child car seat rules being reviewed, says Department for Transport

here

Iggi999 · 03/05/2016 06:54

So, you are more safety conscious than the families you've seen using nothing, but less safety conscious than those of us using high backed boosters.
Halo

Iggi999 · 03/05/2016 06:55

My child is in the tallest few of the class, and the only one I ever see getting into a car seat, most are also getting into the front seat.

BathshebaDarkstone · 03/05/2016 07:01

Has anyone got a link to the new law? We don't have a car, but my aunts do and they have DD to stay sometimes, they share a backless booster.

EdithWeston · 03/05/2016 07:11

"But the government said talks are ongoing and there was no date as yet.".

(from the BBC article of 27 April, that DubioisCredential linked)

But organisations such as Which? are making a safety case for no-back boosters to be restricted to only by those over 125cms or 22 kgs (with current 'must be in a seat' rule of 135cms or 12 years remaining in place).

FishWithABicycle · 03/05/2016 07:11

When the new regulations on booster cushions come in, they will only apply to new sales so apparently if you already have a backless booster and use it in accordance with the rules that were in place at the time you bought it, you will not be breaking the law.

arandomname · 03/05/2016 07:13

YANBU.

I discovered friends of mine who worry about safety in other aspects thought it was fine to drive with their toddler on their lap if not enough space in the car as "only a short journey" (10 minute drive).

They thought I was crazy for suggesting two journeys so everyone could have a proper seat.

In other aspects they're safety conscious, it made no sense to me at all.

Afreshstartplease · 03/05/2016 07:19

I've found this too

My almost 7&8 year olds have a hbb in grandparents car (we don't drive)

We also have two backless boosters at home which they use if going out with other people unexpectedly

Recently on two occasions my son has gone to a birthday party and swimming with a group of friends aged 7+8 where he has been the only child taking a seat of any kind

Over a year ago his best friends mum told me her son won't use one anymore and he is shorter than my son!

Eldest is now over 125 but insure about younger one I need to measure him as their hbb are pushing it for how long we have had them and may need replacing

Cuppaand2biscuits · 03/05/2016 07:24

A Facebook friend of mine posted 3 videos of her 3 year old son sat directly on the back seat of a moving car. The first time I thought it might be a one off (but why the hell would you post it on Facebook )
The second and third times I commented asking about his car seat and she deleted my comment but left the videos up.

StrawberrytallCake · 03/05/2016 07:25

I went to mothercare to buy a high back isofix seat for my tall 7yo and was told not to buy one - she doesn't need a car seat at all. Confused

Afreshstartplease · 03/05/2016 07:30

How tall is she strawberry!

m0therofdragons · 03/05/2016 07:33

Haha so you criticise others when you're not following the advice yourself? When we bought dd1s booster seat 5 years ago we were told basic boosters aren't safe and britax stopped making them a few years back as they weren't safe so if you were advised to use a non high back booster you were badly advised. But then my 8yo is over 125cm and still in a high back booster. I'm always baffled why you wouldn't keep them in the safest seat. I do understand boosters are better than nothing and my dc have travelled without high backs in other people's cars when a journey is unexpected.

Skittlesss · 03/05/2016 07:34

My SIL has taken her kids out of car seats now because they are 125cm tall and they were whinging that a lot of their classmates don't use seats. The youngest was aged 6 when she did this. I said I didn't think that was right, but she said it is and that at 125cm tall you can just sit on the seats like an adult. Hmm she offered me their cast off backless boosters and was quite offended when I said that I will keep mine in their tall car seats as I had read that the backless boosters are pretty unsafe (especially for my 3 yr old who is still in aged 2 trousers).

Ivegotyourgoat · 03/05/2016 07:34

The law says that children must use a booster until they're 12, or 135cm, whichever comes first.

My 8 year old is over 135cm so I've stopped using one now.

I would assume it becomes unsafe to use one once they're over that height?

pinkpanda101 · 03/05/2016 07:46

My kids were both in a HBB until they were 12. MaxiCosi Rodi XP, which is height-adjustable.

The law in Germany is 150cm and 12yo, and they are very strict about it. (My German friend would not have driven us home from the airport if my 11yo had refused to sit in their spare booster!)

They never complained about it as the safety argument totally trumps the "not cool" one. They also found them comfy, nice to sleep in on a long journey.

The laws in UK are far too woolly and there's not enough police presence to clamp down on parents who don't use car seats.

witsender · 03/05/2016 07:49

Those backless booster cushions are a shower of shite, I'm truly amazed anyone uses them...law or not.

SaveSomeSpendSome · 03/05/2016 07:53

People who dont use correct car seats make me mad!!

People are so desperate for them to go up to the next car seat way before the child is ready.

My cousin is adamant that her only just 1 year old outgrew her first car seat at 9 months old. This is impossible as shes really tiny.

She sold the car seat and didnt buy another one.

Now the child is only just 12 months and sits on her mums knee in the car!!!!

She doesnt drive thank god but i cannot believe people allow her to sit in their car with the baby on her lap.

Stupid idiot

KeyserSophie · 03/05/2016 07:54

Re your opening post, I think if you ask someone to give your child a lift home you shouldnt assume they'll have a spare seat available, especially if your child is above the legal age not to use one. I have to admit I wouldn't ask you to provide a seat in those circumstances, nor would I mention that I didnt have one.

MrsHathaway · 03/05/2016 07:55

OP, you're using the same argument as "them" so it's disingenuous to say you don't understand why.

My 7yo has been over 135cm for a while but will be in his HBB until it's actively unsafe for him (he is on the highest setting) and then a backless booster until he meets the five tests for going without, which have to do with having long enough thighs for the main seat and a long enough back that the seatbelt sits on his shoulder not his neck.

My parents were early adopters of car seats - they retrofitted seatbelts in the back of the car in the 1980s when most people didn't bother - so I've grown up with the attitude that you stay on a booster until it's safer without. DH didn't, and it's a flash point of argument for us.

Mov1ngOn · 03/05/2016 08:04

If I'm arranging lifts I always work out car seats. We have one backless booster as an extra we use in the middle seat but we tend to work out if I need to use a friends or give mine if travelling!

BombadierFritz · 03/05/2016 08:05

I'd be judging you both :)

Most people i know either just use those backless boosters or nothing at that age. Most people are a bit lax

MrsHathaway · 03/05/2016 08:07

Ivegot - I'm afraid that isn't right. You might consider getting a booster so that the car's seatbelt will fit properly.

• Does he sit all the way back against the car's seat?
• Do his knees bend comfortably at the edge of the seat?
• Does the lap belt naturally rest below his belly, touching the top of his thighs?
• Is the shoulder belt centered across his shoulder and chest?
• Can he stay seated like this for the whole trip?