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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be really pissed off at DS

96 replies

WalkingdeadWHAT · 29/04/2016 23:45

DS is 9. A really early riser, he gets up about 6am goes downstairs, washes/changes has breakfast and watches TV until we get up about 7.30.

We have Amazon prime. There is parental controls (pin lock) on anything over their age range. .We've had it for over two years and had no problems.

Was watching TV tonight and DP asked if I'm watching Walking Dead again. I said no, clicked on it (it was on the continue watching section), last episode watched was the middle of series 2 (we've watched to the end of series 6)

Turns out DS has been watching one episode each morning before we get up Shock. Not just once but nearly to the middle of series 2.

He knows he isn't allowed. He's asked before and been told no way (after I stopped laughing). He's asked for the WD comics and been told no.

AIBU thinking he's in the wrong here?! DP thinks it's obvious he would try and watch it and I should have been more careful with the pin, which on reflection was pretty easy to crack. Am I being naive to think DS should be trusted and not made to stay in bed each morning until we get up because he might put a programme on he KNOWS he isn't allowed to watch?

OP posts:
JayDot500 · 29/04/2016 23:56

Change the pin and ban him from Netflix for a certain period of time.

He's nine and old enough to know that with every risk, there can be unwanted consequences. Yes, he's still a child so he's going to apply his brain to get what he wants if it's within reach, but you expressly told him he couldn't watch it, and he watched it anyway. Tell him you know how to check what times shows are being watches, so you will know if he breaks your rules and will be punished further.

He's smart, but gon' learn! You will laugh about it together when he's older. Some of my funniest memories revolve around me being cheeky and being disciplined.

FlaviaAnsell · 29/04/2016 23:59

DS definitely in the wrong. As you say, he knew he wasn't supposed to and did it anyway. Appropriate sanctions called for.

I can't help thinking how much he must have enjoyed his secret Walking Dead watching sessions. But he shouldn't get away with it.

MiddleClassProblem · 30/04/2016 00:03

I'm surprised he hasn't had nightmares!

Agree with a temporary ban etc. Worst case you could turn the Internet off over night but that might be crap for you and you'd have to take the cable as he would probably turn it back on.

I'm wondering if there is anything similar a bit more family friendly. Growing up we had Goosebumps, are you afraid of the dark and even buffy.

LuisSuarezTeeth · 30/04/2016 00:05

Apply the appropriate sanctions. Then watch it with him.

LuisSuarezTeeth · 30/04/2016 00:05

He's going to try everything to watch it anyway :/

Babynamechange · 30/04/2016 00:31

He's obviously desperate to see it, and being able to watch means a lot to him. Can you not find a way to all watch it together as a family?....so he's seeing it in a safe environment
Yes you could restrict him and punish him, but that will just make him resentful and more likely to sneak around in the future. Is that what you want to achieve

JayDot500 · 30/04/2016 00:47

^Er, Babynamechange, how about no. He's nine and if that were my son I wouldn't really care how much he wanted to see it, it's not appropriate for him. What child isn't resentful when they don't get their own way? Must I flake at every inappropriate passion of his? Haaaeeeyllll no.

www.commonsensemedia.org/tv-reviews/the-walking-dead

FlaviaAnsell · 30/04/2016 00:49

It's rated 18. If OP gives way on this, what happens the next time he wants to watch or play something with an 18 rating? He's only nine.

JayDot500 · 30/04/2016 01:00

Exactly Flavia. He can't even go watch a flipping 12A movie by himself but he wants to watch Zombies being killed in every way imaginable... Nah.

Toy Story is a zombie movie for kids, I'd encourage my son to go watch that...

Becky546 · 30/04/2016 01:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DowntonIsMyHome · 30/04/2016 01:56

turn the internet off overnight? until he's out for school, then he won't be able to access anything unsuitable (well, online anyway!)

RoryHuntzberger · 30/04/2016 02:13

If he's watching Amazon Prime on your telly then I've got to assume he's watching it off a Firestick as it doesn't come built in to TVs like Netflix does.

If it is off a Firestick the solution is simple, pull it out when you go to bed. He can still watch TV in the morning just your normal channels not stuff on the Firestick. If it's an app, change the PIN and start again.

YANBU to be pissed off I've been in a similar situation myself, but it'll fade, just discipline as normal and move on.

eeyorestails · 30/04/2016 02:50

Change the pin, but you may want to tell him as if he keeps trying you may get locked out of the account

funniestWins · 30/04/2016 03:56

babynamechange
so he's seeing it in a safe environment

I would love to know what this means Confused

OP I think you and DP are both correct. Your son will have tried to watch it - it's what children do. Your son should get an appropriate punishment and you should make the PIN more difficult.

Perhaps dress up as a zombie and wake him up 6" from his face. It'll scare him into not watching it for a few years Smile

puglife15 · 30/04/2016 05:45

Perhaps dress up as a zombie and wake him up 6" from his face. It'll scare him into not watching it for a few years smile

This is brilliant, in a totally evil way!

CheerfulYank · 30/04/2016 05:57

Yes he's wrong. I love TWD but no way in hell is my son of a similar age watching it.

Of course he will try, but that's what parents are for.

curren · 30/04/2016 06:19

Of course he was wrong to watch it. But most kids do stuff they aren't meant to do. A small punishment and, yes, make the pin harder.

I would have done what he did myself. I am pretty relaxed about age guidelines for my kids. But only if I have seen something first. You have watched it and feel its unsuitable, that's enough of a reason.

differentnameforthis · 30/04/2016 06:34

To be fair, if you are going to leave a child unsupervised, of course they are going to push their luck as to what they can watch.

Make the pin harder, but I wouldn't punish him too harshly, as you said yourself, you made the pin too easy! You knew he wanted to watch it, so it is your responsibility to make sure he can't access the material you don't want him seeing.

so he's seeing it in a safe environment

I would love to know what this means with his parents who can answer any questions if he has any?

TrafficJunkie · 30/04/2016 06:40

My 9 year old was obsessed with wanting to watch TWD. I showed him some photos of the actors getting their makeup etc on for the show and it totally grossed him out and he didn't ask again.

I can't believe your DS managed to watch it without nightmares. I sometimes have nightmares 😂😂

Oh and yes. Punish. YaNBU.

Babynamechange · 30/04/2016 06:58

Ok ok...I haven't seen walking dead, but I'm assuming that as so many people on here have said how much they love it, it has a pretty decent plot and isn't just about senseless zombie killing?
So by safe.....I meant that if you watch it as a family then you can cover him with a duvet when anything gruesome is about to happen? Perhaps? (I would have to do the same for myself as I can bare to watch anything like that but love a good plot nonetheless)
But like i said, I haven't seen it and judging by the reaction here I'm being way to accommodating ...... So ...Sorry and Flowers

acasualobserver · 30/04/2016 06:59

Buy a sword and strap it to your back Michonne-style. Your son will take the hint.

acasualobserver · 30/04/2016 07:04

I'm assuming that ...it has a pretty decent plot and isn't just about senseless zombie killing

I actually only watch it for the senseless zombie killing. And I'm never disappointed.

Goingtobeawesome · 30/04/2016 07:08

Asking if you are in the wrong is a bit worrying. Is it your DH that has made you feel you are over reacting or are you doubting your own decisions?

It isn't obvious that he would try. Only children who think they are cleverer than their parents would try and do stuff that they have been told they aren't allowed to do. *i suspect I'll be laughed at for that but I had no parents and a unconventional upbringing and wasn't as normal as I see my kids are so I'm going on how I feel.

Change the pin. He's banned from tv in the mornings for at least as long as he's been watching the programmes, ie, if he's watched them for thirteen days then no telly for 13 days and he only gets the privilege back once he's shown he's learnt his lesson, accepts he was wrong and apologises.
The
Your DH should stop blaming you or is he not a parent too?Hmm

SugarPlumTree · 30/04/2016 07:11

If you stuck him under a duvet when something gory happened he'd soon be struggling to breath !

That would be a Netflix ban plus careful controls in future if it were my DS.

TurnOffTheTv · 30/04/2016 07:11

I won't even let my 14yo watch it! It's absolutely not suitable to watch as a family Hmm