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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

House inheritance what to do? WIBU?

99 replies

Fizzielove · 23/04/2016 20:49

So as I'm sure some of you are aware my DH and I are renovating my parents house to move into. I was the sole inheritor.

I guess when probate is completed the house will go into my name?
Would I be unreasonable to put the house in DC names? Can I do that? Can I get DH to sign to say he has no investment in the house? Just to clarify we have a great marriage and have been together 17 years! But you read so many bad stories of women being left (or men) and the other half taking them to the cleaners.

Basically I want to safe guard my parents hard work for the next generation no matter what happens to me! Is it possible to do this? I'm also not sure how I'd go about asking DH to sign something like that!?

Opinions? WIBU to try to do something or should I just stumble on and hope that we live happily ever after?

OP posts:
LottieDoubtie · 23/04/2016 20:51

I'm not an expert but it doesn't sound like a great idea to me.

Worrying about alarmest stories to the extent that you lose faith in your husband of 17 years isn't healthy...

Original poster
Fizzielove · 23/04/2016 20:54

Well I'd rather be prepared! (Girl guide and all that!! LOL)

I honestly believe and hope that we will be together for the long haul!

OP posts:
wwyd123 · 23/04/2016 20:54

You should talk to your solicitor about amending the will, to put the house in an interest in possession trust, so the house is in trust for your dc put you can libe in it till you die. (You don't want to be kicked out during a teenage strop)

andintothefire · 23/04/2016 20:54

You should get proper advice from a solicitor. There are several different options that may be suitable (including trusts). Simply putting the house into your children's names is of course one option, but could also lead to a lot of unforeseen difficulties (particularly if they are young). I think that this is a situation where legal advice specific to your situation is absolutely essential.

ABetaDad1 · 23/04/2016 20:56

If the DCs are the beneficial owners they can evict you.

If it is your sole and only family home that you intend to live in it forever then keep it in your name.

A future spouse of your DCs may claim it as an asset if they divorce in future and force a sale when you are old and vulnerable.

magoria · 23/04/2016 20:56

Is your H putting money into the renovations? If so is it a lot? If he were putting in a substantial % of what is currently your family money into this property I think it is a little unfair for him to then to waive any rights to it.

If very little family money is going into the property then I think it would be fair. I think you would need to check on the legal ramifications before you do this.

TheDowagerCuntess · 23/04/2016 20:56

My brother and I inherited our parents' place. It's in both our names. It hadn't occurred to me to ask DH to sign something saying he has no claim on it.

DB has no children and never will. The house will therefore one day belong to my DC.

I don't think you really need to take any extra precautions. But maybe I am being naive.

AveEldon · 23/04/2016 20:57

you would need to use a trust as iirc children under 18 can't own property in the UK directly

TheDowagerCuntess · 23/04/2016 20:57

Actually, the house is in the name of the family trust, so I guess it's all pretty straightforward from that respect.

VertigoNun · 23/04/2016 20:59

I think you're wise to safeguard a home for your children and yourself. You hear of widowers marrying and the stepmother inheriting.

I don't think you need to tell your husband or children until they are adults. A solicitor organised document giving you lifetime residence rent free sounds good.

hownottofuckup · 23/04/2016 20:59

If you sign to your DC's and they marry and divorce, their divorced spouse can force a sale of your home to claim their share i think. Happened to my SIL.
But maybe you can put a caveat in for that/things might have changed by then.

IAmTheWhoreOfBabylon · 23/04/2016 21:03

You may find your DC not so nice if cash is involved and be without a home
I work in discharge planning from hospital and nothing families do would surprise me anymore
I will keep my possessions in my name

Lemonblast · 23/04/2016 21:06

You are absolutely right to protect it as your asset. Worse case scenario, you die. Your husband inherits the house, he remarries, then divorces or dies. His new wife and her children have a legitimate claim on your parents house.

ClashCityRocker · 23/04/2016 21:12

You can set it up as a trust with you as a life tenant. That way, you get use of it whilst you're alive but the kids are the ultimate beneficiaries when you cork it. Simplest way to do this would be a deed of variation of the will, which can be done within two years - you will need to get solicitors involved.

Have you thought about what will happen if you pre-decease your husband?

It does seem a bit harsh if he has no other significant assets - I hate to use the 'if it was a bloke saying this...' line but I thought marital assets where, well, marital assets.

WeAllHaveWings · 23/04/2016 21:12

my uncle owned by grandparents house and evicted them because he had debts and needed money. don't think it doesn't happen.

speaking to a solicitor to make sure you are protected from your own dc may seem unnatural but is essential.

IceMaiden73 · 23/04/2016 21:15

You need to speak to a solicitor

How old are the children? If they are minors then they cannot legally own it, but a trust might be an option. However, if you put in trust, it might limit what you can then do if you want to sell, etc

Original poster
Fizzielove · 23/04/2016 21:17

To clarify DH is not financially putting anything into this house.

My DC are very young too.

OP posts:
katemiddletonsnudeheels · 23/04/2016 21:18

Lemonblast has said exactly what I was going to.

IceMaiden73 · 23/04/2016 21:19

I would have thought at the moment that getting a legal document drawn up between you and the OH, and a change to your will would be enough

Ninefreerangeeggs · 23/04/2016 21:19

Totally get your wanting to look after dcs, I would feel the same. Beware though that in putting the house in their names, if you and dh live there meanwhile you may be liable to inheritance tax. It would be wise to check with your accountant before making any final decisions

FiveGoMadInDorset · 23/04/2016 21:21

Bi think if it is in their names you need to pay them rent but probably wrong

Original poster
Fizzielove · 23/04/2016 21:22

If I pre-deceased DH I certainly wouldn't want him to sell the house and move or squander the money or if he were to remarry for the house to end up going to another family and not my DC IYSWIM?

I guess I'll speak to my solicitor.

Thanks guys! Cake

OP posts:
harshbuttrue1980 · 23/04/2016 21:22

If you die before your husband, would you be happy to have him kicked out of his home as an old age pensioner? Your children will grow up and marry, and won't want their stepdad in the house. If I was your husband, I would tell you to stick your "agreement" where the sun doesn't shine. He's a long term spouse, not some bloke that you met last month.

I agree with Clash. Why is it that, when the man comes into money (whether from hard work or inheritance), "all money is family money", but when the woman does, "all the woman's money is her money"??

TooShyShyHushHush · 23/04/2016 21:24

I would speak to a solicitor and have it put in some sort of trust with a clause you can live their until they die.

If you word it with your husband from a 'protecting a stable home for them should I die' point of view he may understand better.

VertigoNun · 23/04/2016 21:24

It's about keeping the money in the family, the husband isn't being kicked out of the house.