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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Have I just been a massive wanker?

100 replies

trashcanjunkie · 23/12/2015 18:34

I've got twin boys who are ten. One of them is at a party which was a cinema party. Instead of going for food after the film they've gone back to the home of the birthday boy.

I got a text from his mum (Who I have known through the dcs primary for years, and she is a social worker) saying my ds was panicking as they all are playing Call of Duty on the Xbox/PlayStation as he isn't allowed to.

Why the hell would anyone think it's appropriate to let ten year olds play that?

I text back saying absolutely not, and then got asked what games he can play. I've said 12 and under.

I feel really rubbish being put in that position, and even worse for poor ds. I hope he's not getting loads of grief.

OP posts:
Waltermittythesequel · 23/12/2015 18:36

I have the exact same problem. I do worry that ds will be teased or is missing out but fuck me! Young kids should not be playing that game.

WildStallions · 23/12/2015 18:36

You've done the right thing.

Very weird of the mum.

doceodocere · 23/12/2015 18:36

How honest of him. It's good that your friend checked with you.

No you're not a wanker.

iwantgin · 23/12/2015 18:36

YANBU.

Maybe she lets her DC play those games but she should have checked with you (and the other parents) before letting other children play.

bumblebeerat · 23/12/2015 18:37

Yanbu I wouldn't want my 10yr old playing those games either. Even if I did I would no way think it was ok to just assume other people would be fine with it.

Gileswithachainsaw · 23/12/2015 18:37

18 games are 18 for a reason.

isn't there one where you can beat and kill prostitutes in it?

I've never played these games but aren't they graphic and bloody and inappropriate language is used?

Yanbu

Osolea · 23/12/2015 18:39

You have absolutely not been a wanker, and you should be very proud of your ds. I should imagine that he's not the only child there that knows their parents wouldn't be happy about them playing Call of Duty, but he's been the only one with the confidence to say so.

I would be really pissed off with a parent doing this, she shouldn't be allowing her child to play that game, and should have enough common sense not to put any children or parents in the position she has done.

FriendofBill · 23/12/2015 18:40

Just because 'everyone else' does it, doesn't mean it's right.

I'm with you OP.

Had similar issue at after school club and I said NO to shooting games.

DoreenLethal · 23/12/2015 18:41

What is a social worker?

DoreenLethal · 23/12/2015 18:41

As in social worker ?

eleven59 · 23/12/2015 18:42

I've had the same issue. I don't understand why anyone would let a ten year old play that game. Dreadful imo. You should be proud of your son who did the right thing too.

TheSecondViola · 23/12/2015 18:43

I had the same thing recently, my DC said they weren't allowed to play games like that and the host mum told him not to be silly there was nothing wrong with it.
If they want to make the dick move to let 10 year olds play adult games they should keep it to their own kids and have a bit if respect for other peoples parenting especially when they are clearly better at it

wickedwaterwitch · 23/12/2015 18:44

I think you were right BUT I would say, I was similarly tough on COD and if I had my time again I'd relax a bit, it's really not that bad.

MetalPetal86 · 23/12/2015 18:45

This is ridiculous. You are definitely not being unfair. I'm sure they wouldn't be ok with an 18 film.

scrivette · 23/12/2015 18:47

You should be really proud of your DS, it must have been hard for him to say that in front of his friends.

I don't understand why people allow their young children to play games such as these.

Scarydinosaurs · 23/12/2015 18:47

A social worker is someone who has been trained in safeguarding children, and part of that safeguarding training explicitly covers exposing children to age inappropriate material and the consequences of doing that.

HazelOrBigwig · 23/12/2015 18:48

You've not been a wanker OP.

The other mum has put you and your DS in an awkward position, and I'd feel exactly the same as you. My DD would also worry about age limits.

TartanBirdFeeder · 23/12/2015 18:51

Somebody certainly is being a wanker here. OP, it's not you and your son.

Coffeethrowtrampbitch · 23/12/2015 18:53

No, you should be very proud of DS.

I found out last year my DS who is 8 had been playing COD at his friend's house since he was 6!

DS let it slip by accident, I was furious but as he's been playing it for so long decided not to ban him from his friend's house.

He did get into trouble for lying, at least your DS was honest and I would be pleased at that and not second guess myself. Your child, your rules.

NowBringUsSomeFuzzpiggyPudding · 23/12/2015 18:54

Blimey. Erm, no you most certainly have not been a wanker

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 23/12/2015 18:55

DS3- played CoD, Halo and other stuff as he had older brothers when he was 10.

He is fine': high achieving, mixes well and doesn't feel the need to blast his mates into Kingdom come with a gun;

I appreciate you're pissed off but it's not that bad.

My kids are older, I'm probably wrong according to the youth of Mumsnet.

Goingtobeawesome · 23/12/2015 18:57

Well done, OP. I've never understood parents who let their kids do stuff they don't want them too on the say so of another parent.

MerryMarigold · 23/12/2015 18:58

YABU. If my dc were at someone else's house, I would want to be asked if they could watch something which was a higher cert than their age - game, movie, whatever. I would certainly be unhappy livid if they were shown an 18 or 15 film, so I don't really see the difference.

SaucyJack · 23/12/2015 18:58

I've had a really stressful week OP, and after reading your thread title I was relishing the chance to call someone wanker of the week- but sadly for me- no, you're not being U.

I'm a fairly lax parent, but no way in Hell would my 10 year old be playing 18 cert games.

MerryMarigold · 23/12/2015 18:59

(Oh, my ds1 is 10 too)

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