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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that, by date 3, this is a big red flag?

102 replies

Lostin3dspace · 12/07/2015 11:13

I'm about to go on date 3 with a man I thought was lovely, but he sent me a text yesterday telling me what he thought I'd look lovely in, including length of dress, perfume, underwear, light makeup. Up until this point, I was looking forward to it, but now I'm very skeptical. Am I just overthinking this? It's not like he's asked me to wear anything outlandish.

OP posts:
SoundsLegit · 12/07/2015 11:14

Yep, run a mile.

IHaveBrilloHair · 12/07/2015 11:15

Sprint!

CamelHump · 12/07/2015 11:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

velouria · 12/07/2015 11:16

Think he needs to buy a blow up doll to dress up, ick

MrsBertMacklin · 12/07/2015 11:16

Abandon Ship!

ChampagneBabyCakes · 12/07/2015 11:17

Controlling on date 3... Move on!

I don't mind my partner saying he has a favourite dress of mine, or colour, but he doesn't get to tell me what to wear.

BunnyRuddington · 12/07/2015 11:17

Cancel the date politely, then block his number.

SakuraSakura · 12/07/2015 11:17

Do not waste your time on date 3 op.

Sighing · 12/07/2015 11:18

Time to don the parachute and let that plane crash into a mountain without you!

BlossomTang · 12/07/2015 11:18

He comes across as a bit controlling... Shock

paulapompom · 12/07/2015 11:18

Weird and controlling (judgey pants on and I don't care) agree with all pp - run like fuck and don't look back! X

cozietoesie · 12/07/2015 11:19

Watch

FabULouse · 12/07/2015 11:19

This reply has been deleted

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reni1 · 12/07/2015 11:19

Cancel the date, be glad he showed you this early, much harder to run later.

Sianilaa · 12/07/2015 11:20

Yikes!! I would not be going on the date...

froggyjump · 12/07/2015 11:20

I'd be tempted to turn up in the opposite, or scruffy jeans etc and see how he reacts - if he's ok with it then he might just have been trying to be flirty?? but if he is 'disappointed' or whatever, tell him it's up to you how you dress and walk out

AlpacaPicnic · 12/07/2015 11:20

Oh I'd turn up in the exact opposite outfit just to gauge his reaction. If he seemed pissed off then run. If he seemed smug because he was using reverse psychology just run.
Actually I'd run anyway, but I'd try the alternate outfit first! Just for shits n giggles...

Teabagbeforemilk · 12/07/2015 11:20

Fucking hell!!! DH wouldn't suggest this and we have been together 15 years, unless i asked his opinion.

Did you ask his opinion?

If no, don't go on this date.

LilyMayViolet · 12/07/2015 11:21

Totally weird! Yes, abandon this now op. Such strange behaviour, at best very presumptuous at worst controlling.

corlan · 12/07/2015 11:21

Run! Run like the wind!

LeftMyRidingCropInTheMortuary · 12/07/2015 11:21

Wowzers!
Put your trainers on and run!

WLmum · 12/07/2015 11:21

Scary - don't go!

balls2DWall · 12/07/2015 11:21

reply back and say "no problem but if we are going to do this i need to tell you what i want you to wear. gimp suit with mask and dog collar".

AlpacaPicnic · 12/07/2015 11:21

Haha, froggy cross post!

stressedoutnan · 12/07/2015 11:22

Oh dear he sounds very controlling and you aren't even in a relationship yet! personally I would run a mile. He sounds very forward too by dictating your underwear. Sex should happen naturally not forced, and if a guy told me what underwear to wear I wouldn't be able to relax as I'd know he was expecting it.