Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

Outdoing others at Christmas

81 replies

QuinnTwinny · 15/12/2014 00:57

I have several friends giving daily updates of their (frankly ridiculous) lists and generally getting quite braggy about what they have bought their children. I put a photo on Facebook of our tree and was almost immediately met with questions about how many of them are for DS, what they are and how much I had spent. I also ended up looking on netmums, because of a few comments from here, am I am gobsmacked at the blatant bragging!

AIBU to feel sad that christmas is pretty much turning into a pissing contest for some people?

OP posts:

JustMuddlingBobBobBobbingAlong · 15/12/2014 01:07

YANBU to be sad at the competitive nature of some people. YWBU if you got caught up in it. Ignore them and enjoy your Christmas.

Original poster

QuinnTwinny · 15/12/2014 01:25

I'm not caught up in it, thank goodness. I love christmas, so much fun and DS is in his element. I would never brag about what I have bought him though! I just hate the idea that christmas is effectively a competition now. There seems to be so much effort put into posting online how much you have bought and how much you have spent.

OP posts:

Bulbasaur · 15/12/2014 05:21

We have no gifts under the tree. DD would chew on them and unwrap them early. I have a couple friends that have mountains of gifts near their trees with their children sitting in front of them with big grins. It does make me feel a wee insecure that I'm can't afford a big Christmas, but Christmas isn't about the gifts.

I just don't get caught up in it, and post pictures of what we do instead, like baking cookies or looking at houses with lights. :)

Greydog · 15/12/2014 06:02

I think that most of them have just wrapped up empty boxes to look good. Just like a magazine photoshoot!

velocityofrudolph · 15/12/2014 06:16

We have a pile of gifts under the tree, all empty boxes because it looks nice. I have a 'friend' who used to tell me constantly about how much her dc were getting, which I used to find quite upsetting at times because we had a very strict budget and I thought I wasn't buying enough. Then I realised that she only told me because she knew it upset me, so I stopped paying attention to her. My dc are grown up now, and say that they always had great Christmases, no matter how much or how little they got. I find all the bragging about how much they spend distasteful to be honest, so don't even look at the posts anymore

Mehitabel6 · 15/12/2014 07:10

I think you need different friends! I have never had that!

Zippidydoodah · 15/12/2014 07:15

What mehitable said! Not a single person doing this on my FB!

Altinkum · 15/12/2014 07:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TInselaffe · 15/12/2014 08:07

Only one person was doing this on my facebook (a relative) who commented along the lines of, "Am stealing your great idea [name of friend] and writing my Christmas List in [well known posh cafe]". Sad to say I wasn't familiar with this type of bragging and thought she was doing lists of food etc., so clicked on it (I do like a good food list!) to find it was FULL of really expensive and 'now' (e.g. that bloody Elsa doll) presents for her DD.

Fine, if that is her Christmas list, but very very poor taste to shove a massive picture of it on facebook when so many are struggling this year and, really, as a supposedly devout Christian (she makes a big deal out of this) she should know that Capitalism is not what Christmas is meant to be about. The whole thing left me with a sour taste in my mouth and I've learned to hide future posts.

I haven't had my coffee yet.

Vvvoom · 15/12/2014 08:12

Do people really wrap empty boxes and put them under the tree? Im amazed!

marne2 · 15/12/2014 08:21

We don't put anything under our tree the dogs would eat them and dd would unwrap them too.

I don't care what other people have bought their kids, I buy things I think they will like and use ( I buy quite a bit ), I don't feel the need to brag or compare with my friends.

BiddyPop · 15/12/2014 08:21

I wrap a shoebox witha screwdriver, spare batteries, sellotape, and a few other useful bits in it to get at easily over the holidays and especially when. Opening presents.

I will have a fair few presents under the tree in the next shay or 2 but that's because I have a huge extended fa,mil u to give to.

I haven't really said much about what we are getting dd to anyone, everyone will see at Christmas and the anticipation is nice.

I don't like ostentation around Christmas, but then again, I don't do Facebook etc to brag about things in general.

Storytown · 15/12/2014 08:22

You can't put presents under the tree until Christmas morning. It's an open invitation to burglars, or that's what my parents have always insisted.

VikingLady · 15/12/2014 08:26

Nothing goes under our tree until Christmas Eve after DD is in bed - I don't think her patience is up to the temptation! Tbh her advent calendar is hard enough for her

I do have a few "friends" doing the competitive thing, but the majority are swapping tips on budgeting, which suits me better and I'm winning that

Hatespiders · 15/12/2014 08:30

Oh dear, that blessed Facebook! It seems to cause no end of strife.

Our naughty Siamese cats would delight in weeing on any wrapped presents under the tree. Any new item that appears in our house has to be 'neutralised' by wee; they think they're doing us a service.

Christmas does get competitive if you let it. It's a good idea for people not to compare their arrangements with other folks' , it escalates into a Crimbo One-Upmanship War.

mrsminiverscharlady · 15/12/2014 08:31

I tend to pity people like this as a general rule. People who boast like this always have feelings of inadequacy and are trying to make themselves feel better IME.

Although anyone who decribes their child's presents as a 'pile' irritates the hell out of me.

Songofsixpence · 15/12/2014 08:41

I've got quite a few friends on FB posting pics of their kids' huge present piles this year.

I posted a picture of my Christmas tree, but there's no presents under there. I haven't wrapped anything yet. Also, my cats seem to think under the tree is the in place to play fight. I had to re-wrap everything last year.

skylark2 · 15/12/2014 08:53

We always put presents under the tree as soon as they are wrapped. Saves all the pratting about with clever hiding places, and things being forgotten.

Not sure any of them are for our kids, though - it tends to be things for other relatives which are dealt with first.

I don't use Facebook, so I haven't a clue if my friends are posting brag photos.

PossumPoo · 15/12/2014 08:54

I just had a (slim) friend post on FB she cant believe how much weight some of her friend's are putting on.

FB can just bring out the worst in people.

DrSeuss · 15/12/2014 09:02

I would just reply that I spent a fiver all told, the kids are getting a lump of coal and that all of the presents were for me! Then I'd hide their posts on my home page and make sure I customised the privacy of any further photos I posted. Refuse to engage!

Ilovehamabeads · 15/12/2014 09:28

My parents always had a load of empty boxes wrapped under the tree, as all our presents were hidden until Xmas morning. They used to say the tree looked bare otherwise.

notagainffffffffs · 15/12/2014 09:34

Yanbu- I have a lovely lovely friend who has constantly posted pictures of what she has bought her two yr old- at the moment the quantity would easily fill a single bedroom.
She is a truly generous person and spends thousands on everyone but it is eye watering!

youarekiddingme · 15/12/2014 09:39

I actually quite like the idea of a few wrapped boxes under tree for decoration! I have Christmas books and some Christmas soft toys! Presents go under Xmas Eve when DS is asleep!

I've not come across competitive bragging but have glanced at and not engaged with posts of wrapped parents and comments such as "half wrapped very pleased with myself" etc.

I don't mind seeing pics of trees and certainly of Tree and gifts on Christmas Eve or day but where is the Christmas magic when it's done and dusted before December?!

LoisHatesChristmas · 15/12/2014 09:46

They asked how much you'd spent? Yikes! The worlds gone mad. I hate this culture of over sharing and expecting others todo the same. I like all the tree pictures on fb but the bragging updates are awful. Not many on my list do it thankfully.

JeanetteDanielsBenziger · 15/12/2014 09:48

YANBU

I avoid Facebook on Christmas eve because of all the 'Santa's been' photos.
Living rooms full to bursting with presents when some children get next to nothing makes me feel a bit yucky.

My children are lucky and get quite a lot from family and friends, but only one present from us, big present from Santa and their stocking, which I feel is more than enough.

Flip

1 2 3 4