To be pissed off I'm treated differently because I look young

[DawnInOnMe]

I'm 27 but look 20 (not in a good way).

I'm starting to get really annoyed at how I'm treated by sales staff. Classic example this morning when I went to try on wedding dresses I was positively sneered at and directed to the sale rail. I was then refused to try on any of the dresses despite the shop being empty.

This is not a one off, I've been refused to test drive a car I wanted to buy before

YABU. I'm 28 and look older. Therefore, YABU

Haha! This is not a stealth boast I swear, I've been told I look "young but tired"

I'm older then you but look younger, especially at weekends when I am dressed very casually.

It is annoying, but I do find the way I dress is a factor so if I want to be treated like my age I ensure my clothes are (boring) more grown up, my hair not in bunches etc.

Do you dress 'young' as well? Because that wouldn't help.

Must be infuriating though.

Sounds an effective way of narrowing down which shop to choose for your wedding dress. Itd not stop me imagining you walking back in in a week with an armfull of designer dresses and shoes and veil and saying "Big mistake. Huge"

I'm 24 but easily pass for 18. I got ID'd for cutlery in Asda last year. CUTLERY.

My brother is 18 and because we look nothing alike, people ask if he's my boyfriend when we're out

On the plus side, my mum is 50 and looks fantastic. She has just started getting the odd grey and has no wrinkles. People think that my brother is her eldest child and are shocked to meet me. I look exactly like her so I'm hoping I look 40 when I'm 50!

My 32 yo SIL was recently asked if her mum was in when she opened the door to a canvasser! But she was definitely bragging when she told me that story .

TBH I doubt the treatment you got in the dress shop was to do with your age - aren't brides "supposed" to be young? And, IME young brides often have their parents paying for the wedding, so the budget might be higher than older brides who are funding it themselves.

Do you look poor?

On the "dressing young" point - no! I dress (I think!) nicely, with dresses, boots, blazers and chunky necklaces, I tend to do 50's-style cat eye eyeliner and I carry a £140 Cambridge Satchel. I may wear jeans and converse when walking the dog but never at any other time.

My mum and dad were getting the windows replaced just a couple of months before I left home (making me 21) and a workman barged into my bedroom and said, "oh sorry, I didn't realise there was anyone in here. No school today, pal?"

I completely understand this. I used to be the same as you, but seem to have turned a corner in the past couple of years (I'm 31) and now no longer get ID'd or surprised comments about my youthful appearance. I honestly haven't ever seen this as a good thing, especially given that I prefer dating slightly older men, who probably dismiss me thinking that I'm far too young for them just because of my appearance!

In my case I don't think the way I dressed exacerbated the problem.

Anyway, just want to let you know OP that I'm with you on how irritating it is and I know your post wasn't a stealth post!

IDed for cutlery? I once got IDed for a plastic spatula

Don't most twenty something's look young, I didn't look much different at 27 than I looked at 18. I did carry myself differently but looking at photos they all seem the same. Thirties and DC changed that though.

Yanbu I am 25 and look 15. I honestly still get a child's fare on the bus and can't go out without my ID on nights out or to buy a lottery ticket

It's frustrating but I hopefully won't be complaining when I'm 40 and look 20. I live in hope

How do you know it was anything to do with your age??

YANBU

This happened to me a lot until I reached my thirties. I found it embarrassing and it gave me a complex, for example when buying alcohol or going to over 18/21 events. It also does not help that I am short.

I did once many years ago get into a theme park at the concessionary rate for under 14's, while my younger taller sister was charged the adult rate. I was in my early twenties at the time. They did not ask me my age just sold me the cheaper ticket.

But I have to say now in my mid forties it is lovely not to have any grey hair.
People who haven't seen me in years say my appearance hasn't changed, but I can see the lines on my face and do look my age.

Yanbu I experienced this all the way until I was thirty and then 3 months after my birthday I was pregnant with ds1 and apparently aged about a decade overnight . It's not just people's perception either because my mirror seems to agree with them! I used to get so frustrated that nobody took me seriously initially, it was only after talking to me for a while they'd realise I wasn't a teenager. And I would be thinking no teenagers dress in court shoes and blazers . But make the most of it now because the grey hairs and suitcases under my eyes are now a big give away that I'm 30+ !

OP, Delphine & Norris - me too! However, I turned the corner of 30 and boom, apparently I now look my age! (I'm sure having a DD helped. Do I mean helped?!). It is infuriating, and I found it particularly impacted my career but I always made sure I spoke up clearly and confidently, dressed smartly when required and made actions speak louder than words (actually saying "but I'm 27" makes you sound immature, no matter how it's put).

I hope your youthful looks don't disappear as quickly as mine did, but I do understand how frustrated you must feel right now!

Thinkivebeenhacked ha ha love that film!

X-post oneandahalf, but yes, exactly!

I feel your pain.
I am mid 30's but look significantly younger, thanks to my mum and her fantastic genes.

A few months ago I was sacked from a job because they decided I looked too young, I understand their reasoning but I am still really annoyed about it.

I can sympathise with you OP. I'm 25 in November but look younger. When DP and I went to look at wedding venues we had this kind of trouble. One venue kept trying to get us to look at marrying midweek because it's cheaper despite not knowing our budget or anything on the up side it was easy to rule that place out!

I'm 32 and still get ID'd for wine, asked if I'm over 18 by charity collectors etc. I know people say it's a blessing and you should be pleased etc but I completely understand how irritating it is. I feel like I'm never taken seriously, it's very frustrating

DawnInOnMe I look younger than I am too but haven't been treated the way you have.

I've been told I look "young but tired"

Is that code for young and scruffy? Maybe that's why they thought you couldn't afford anything expect what's on the sail rail.

Anyway, it doesn't matter the way you were treated was unacceptable. You could make a complaint but I'd think great you didn't give your money to a horrible place and avoid it. They are the ones that missed out.

My husband gets ID'd. He's 31. I worry people think that I'm his mother. I'm 32.

Wait til you get old - then you'll REALLY know what it is to be treated differently .

Boo hoo......I feel so awful for you.....it must be terribly difficult......