People who can't make a simple bloody choice.

[MilkandCereal]

AIBU to want to kill,or maim someone who asks you to get them something from the supermarket,and when asked which flavour they'd like say 'It doesn't matter'. Only to turn their nose up at the flavour you do bring,in spite of asking them again,instore,which they'd prefer?

Surely any jury would be understanding?

Oh, you have met my sil on holiday?

You are free to kill or maim at your pleasure.

I would let you off if I was on the jury!

There was a post like that on here a while ago. The posters work was doing a McDs run and she asked for the burger of the week. They got her the burger of the week which turned out to be something she didn't like. She came on here to bitch about it.

Haha!! My partner dies this all the time. Drives me totally bonkers. I play it safe with some I know he likes then he moans because "it's boring always having the same flavour". Make a chuffing decision yourself then

Dies? Does. Whoops maybe it's wishful thinking

DH does it. I say 'Do you want anything from the shop?' he says 'surprise me' I come home thinking I have done good and he says 'Oh you got that ?'.

Ugh, my mother does this.

"what do you want for dinner?"
I don't mind
"what do you want to do today?"
I don't mind
"Which blunt instrument shall I batter you with?"
I don't mind

I hear you op

Dh : 'get us a bag of crisps will yer'
Me: 'which flavour dearest beloved ?'
Dh : 'oh you know me I eat anything'

Ten minutes later
'you know I fricking hate spicy doritos '

YANBU to the power of 10

I have a number of people who deploy this so that they can either avoid thinking, claim to be easy-going, or play martyred by the tyranny of others. Yes it really is that bad.

E.g. "Shall we go the the beach or the moors today?"
"Whichever you like."
"Okay then, the beach."
"...if you insist."

What on earth is wrong with expressing a preference, or engaging in a 30 second discussion about which might be best, or maybe even offering a suggestion?

I remember that Pipbin. I think the burger of the week was a chicken burger from McDonalds,and the OP had once gotten food poisoning from a KFC burger,so said she was off KFC,but her partner/colleague/friend apparently should have known that no KFC meant no chicken ever,from anywhere.

Personally I'd just be so grateful to be allowed to live after that,that I wouldn't dream of complaining on Mumsnet.

Yanbu.

ME what do you want for dinner
DH anything
ME spag Bol
DH don't fancy that
ME curry
DH no not today
ME well what do you bloody want then.

The worst bit is when they genuinely seem to think that they're being less bother to you. Like it's ever so demanding and unreasonable of them and they're causing more hassle for you if they tell you what they like.

When actually it's usually easier and simpler if they're just clean about what they like in the first place.

Oof I did this for years & years. Several people had to have a go at me before I realised it really was pissing them off! I thought I was being accommodating. I never had any idea what I wanted - now I know this was because my identity had been all but annihilated in childhood, but back then I thought those who would "really fancy a curry" just had strong likes & dislikes. I didn't, so it seemed reasonable to go along with their choices.

I wouldn't have done that "but this isn't what I wanted!" thing, though, as I didn't start off "wanting" iyswim. Asking you to read their mind and then having a go at you for telepathic failure is more than a bit unreasonable!

they're causing more hassle for you if they tell you what they like

See, this part of it was true for me. Raised on a constant stream of "don't be fussy" and "I want doesn't get", stating my wishes felt like a terrible solecism.

I really didn't cotton on that most other people can easily state what they want.

Oh dear, this is me. I can't make a decision or express a preference to save my life. It's often because there's something I secretly really really want but know I can't have so I just go all meh and indecisive.
DH: what would you like for dinner?
Purple: don't mind Domino's
DH: is eggs on toast ok?
Purple: don't mind no it's not fecking ok I want Domino's

DH (later): dinner ok?
Purple: fine not really I wanted Domino's

@shadow im far less charitable. I think it is a way of selfishly offloading the responsibility if decision making or they are putting themselves in a position to complain about a decision made by someone else and blame them for it, or both.

Purple. I did an exercise for several months, where I answered that question with the full truth! I still do it quite a lot, everyone gets it and it raises a chuckle.

Girl in shop: Would you like anything else today?
Me: Yes, an all expenses paid holiday in the Caribbean ...

My PIL do this (though don't complain we got in wrong afterwards) - cannot make a decision on what to do/where to eat/who to visit. It would really annoy DP and he'd passively-aggressively refuse to make a decision for them, so no decision was made. Now I just decide everything and tell them all the plan

ICanSeeTheSun - are you married to my DH?

Me: what do you want for supper?
Him: don't mind
Me: x, y or z?
Him: no, I don't want any of those
Me: a, b, or c then?
Him: no, don't really fancy them.

Following day

Me: right, seeing as the DC and I will eat pretty much anything, you choose what you want for supper
Him: I don't know why you always make me out to be the fussy one, I'm not fussy, why should I always have to choose, rant rant...

I used to be like this! I think it was due to an abusive controlling childhood. I wasn't allowed to express and opinion or preference growing up and I never had a choice. I used to feel anxious and tearful choosing a chocolate bar in a shop! Fortunately I am now more confident and know my own mind but I can see how I must have been really annoying!

My mum does this. What do you want for lunch. I don't mind love, how about soup no it's a bit hot for that. Ok mum baked potatoes. I don't really fancy them at the moment you know potatoes get a bit funny this time of year. However if I say mum do you want a drink. Yes love no need to ask her what she wants its always the same whiskey with a a very little bit of water. No judge in the land would convict me

That made me laugh out loud,HerRoyalNotness.

Sympathies to everyone else who has to put up with this.

Anyone who is incredibly indecisive through no fault of their own gets one of my special free passes. You're not to blame.

But I reserve the right to do serious damage to the others.

I do this.

I don't know why dh hasn't yet smothered me in my sleep.

Pretty much every evening he'll get up to make a cuppa and offer to fetch a delicious choclatey thing.

DH: would you like something from the kitchen?
Me: yes please.
DH: anything in particular?
Me: no, just something sweet.

One minute later he strides back in, looking hopeful, only to have his offerings rejected in favour of something else.

If you ever here news reports of a woman in her 30s in East Anglia being battered to death with a Snickers bar, please know I deserved it.

Me: do you want tea or coffee?
Other person: yes.
Me: tea or coffee?
Other person: don't mind. Which one are you having?
Me: Argh....!

My friend's kids do something similar. If you offer them something it's all "I don't mind." answer to every question. Drives me crazy so I stop offering anything (since they don't mind & all that).