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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

For just wanting my DC to go to school

312 replies

cathkidstonbag · 11/01/2013 06:38

So the week before the Christmas hols I had youngest DC off school with D and V for week and middle DC got it for last 2 days of term. They were both ill on and off over Christmas. As was DH who spent most of the time "having naps". I came down with the same cold he had but obviously mine was nowhere near as bad ;)
So new term starts and I've had middle DC off with a throat infection, she finally starts to rally yesterday and I'm awake early this morning giddy at the thought of getting out of the house alone for the first day in a month.....with that youngest DC walked in and was sick.

AIBU to just want them back to school so I can actually get on with my life. I adore them, I truly do but FFS a month at home......!! DH thinks IBU and it's just one of those things. He's even suggested I rehome our dog as I haven't been able to walk her all week.

OP posts:
LindyHemming · 11/01/2013 06:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LoopsInHoops · 11/01/2013 06:47

Are you a SAHM or are you having to take time off for this?

ChippingInNeedsSleepAndCoffee · 11/01/2013 06:48

I'd rehome the DH Grin

LadyWidmerpool · 11/01/2013 06:49

I would be instructing asking DH to take time off work to do his share.

Original poster
cathkidstonbag · 11/01/2013 06:53

Well technically I am a SAHM although I'm trying to get a new business off the ground so am having to cancel meetings and appointments which isn't ideal.

I'm so tired of being on call 24/7 for a month. I am starting to fantasise about exciting things like a trip to the supermarket!!

OP posts:
LindyHemming · 11/01/2013 07:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
cathkidstonbag · 11/01/2013 07:14

Yes. This morning I asked him to go in to work a bit later so he could walk the dog and take middle DC to school. He said I was BU and to rehome dog. I suppose i should be grateful he didnt suggest rehoming the DC? I really am at the end of my tether. I got no time "off" during holidays, he didn't even do bedtime to give me a break. I feel like the meanest mum ever that I can't just keep smiling.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 11/01/2013 07:18

Is he off work tomorrow? If so book yourself into the hairdressers or something and just go, leave him to sort the children.

Original poster
cathkidstonbag · 11/01/2013 07:21

Yes he's off work but he's "still ill" apparently. So won't be able to help out. Granted he has a cough left over from his cold (it was a nasty virus, I'm still sinus-y from it and I usually don't get colds) but he seems well enough to go to work etc

OP posts:
Tee2072 · 11/01/2013 07:25

Oh for goodness sakes. Dump a glass of water over his head to get him out of bed if you have to, tell him you're going out and leave without the kids. For the whole day.

He'll either man up or they'll make his life hellish. Either way? You win.

KhallDrogo · 11/01/2013 07:28

I don't think he should be taking time off work to help if you are SAHM, but bloody hell...he should definitely be taking over in the evenings and sharing at the weekend so you can get out/ have.a break

And one of you should walk the dog either before he leaves in the morning or when he is home in the evening...why don't you? Just shout to him that you are off out to walk the dog, on your way out the door. Poor dog.

Rosa · 11/01/2013 07:34

A walk outside will do him good and help to clear the germs away. He can look after the ill dc whilst you go to the supermarket ... Heavens when you are sick you have to do it. Or maybe you would like to rehome him as well.......

Gumby · 11/01/2013 07:34

Rehome dh Grin

Show him this thread!!

Original poster
cathkidstonbag · 11/01/2013 07:34

He leaves at 6.30, gets home at 8. I would love to walk the dog when he's home but can't in the evening as he wants the dinner cooked. After that's sorted it's 9.30 ish. Not ideal to walk a dog in pitch black country roads then! Not trying to make excuses but the same thing applies at 5.30am too.

She has a huge garden and I do take her out and do hiding games etc with her during day when DC can watch me from sofa. I don't ignore the dog all day but the deal was she was a family dog (although she dislikes DH so that doesn't help matters!).

OP posts:
TanteRose · 11/01/2013 07:38

Cook a meal - you can eat at 7 or whatever, and he can eat at 8 when he gets in.
As soon as he walks in the door, go and take the dog for a walk

KhallDrogo · 11/01/2013 07:39

Reflective gear and a torch, a microwave dinner for idiot-boy.....walk the dog Otherwise I agree, dog should be rehomed.

I wouldn't be cooking for dh, under those circumstances

Is he usually an arsehole, or is this our of character?

TanteRose · 11/01/2013 07:39

or of course, he can get his own meal when he gets in

TanteRose · 11/01/2013 07:40

or could you pay for someone to walk the dog?

TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 11/01/2013 07:41

DH could cook dinner whilst you walk the dog?

What is going to happen when you get your business up and running (if you ever get the chance)?

CloudsAndTrees · 11/01/2013 07:44

I think I'd be tearing my hair out in your position! YANBU!

You are not being a mean Mum at all, anything that changes your normal routine for that long in term time is a PITA, but looking after a constantly ill family makes it even worse.

I don't think your DH should be taking time of work as other posters have suggested, surely one of the things about having one parent SAH is so that when children are sick the other can still go to work.

I do think he should let go on expecting his dinner cooked to perfection though. This is what egg on toast and takeaways were made for!

How big is your dog? Is the oldest big enough that s/he can take the dog out after school, or are there any willing and dog loving children on your street?

Original poster
cathkidstonbag · 11/01/2013 07:44

DH could cook dinner? Or eat microwave food? Sorry but that won't happen.

The dog has been walked every day since we have had her apart from the last 4. I have taken her out even when ill myself. I am a totally responsible dog owner. I had a friend walk her the week before Xmas when DC was ill but she's on holiday and can't help out. It's not usually a problem, I've never had a run of the DC being ill like this to have to try and work around.

OP posts:
Original poster
cathkidstonbag · 11/01/2013 07:46

And truly, I don't think I will ever get my business off the ground at this rate. DH definitely won't help out with it at all.

OP posts:
GreatUncleEddie · 11/01/2013 07:47

He can microwave a plateful of whatever you all ate earlier. That's not really microwave food.

BeaWheesht · 11/01/2013 07:48

Forget about his dinner - I'm sure he's too ill to eat anyways, right? Wink

Pay someone to walk dog if possible - local teen if dog is good to walk?

Tomorrow just get up and go out - take your mobile in case of emergency but put it straight to answer phone. I know this seems extreme but I've recently done stuff like this because otherwise dh will think you'll always be there, he'll never have to pull his finger out and this will go on and on. Don't listen to excuses - smile and nod then off you go and do what you want. You're a mum not a slave.

TanteRose · 11/01/2013 07:49

your Dh couldn't cook dinner? why, what on earth is wrong with him? Confused