AIBU in thinking that the IPOAT hall has transported to another dimension

[Minimammoth]

Where has it gone? Just as I was about to start sprucing it up for the jubilee and start tatting the bunting?

I'm feeling a bit weird. Why are you wearing that shrimp on your head Umami. Have you come over a bit Gaga. I think the big red button must switch on the infinite improbability drive. Oh look what's happened to the front lawn

Now you're talking

has anyone seen the cocktail-tisane wallah?

He's over there carving the beetroot for the salad

Oh how lovely, I adore a light beetroot salad in the afternoon. Beetroot posset is especially good for mid morning too.

I'm not too keen on beetroot to be honest. I prefer a carrot if he has to carve anything

Borscht tho, now you're talking. Borscht with hare's feet croutons.

I'll just have the vodka thanks

YOU WILL EAT THE BEETROOT, MADAM

Kicks table. Coughs

GO TO YOUR ROOM UNTIL YOU HAVE CALMED DOWN AND WILL SAY SORRY AND EAT THE DEMNED BEETROOT

I used to get sent to my room with my dinner and then I would scrape it all out of the window and watch it splatter the hydrangea below. Custard looked good.

I don't think any of us learned anything from that.

I don't see what you gain from it at all. I'd rather someone enjoyed their meal.

I wish we could all just have pills.

Me too. I'm struggling with food so much at the moment it's become more of a chore :(

Lovely.

Can't beat a nice valium posset on a sunny afternoon

I'm playing with Shirl on her 'eat more to weigh less' thread. You get to the end of the day and think 'damnit, I've still got to eat another 500 calories today, best have a glass of cream before bed to make it up'.

I did that when I hit goal on Atkins. Well not the glass of cream but a bar of chocolate.

If only I had those problems now - a thousand curses at the menopause

It's all too complicated

What are your food troubles Jins? Would a nice glass of Stirrup Cup help?

I think it would help. I've had to go completely gluten free which is ok but it's bunging me up again weirdly.

Uk, that is rubbish. How about lots of lovely seeds? The family physician tells me they're wonderful for regulation of the bowels and prevention of an excess of phlegm.