To think all men are basically pervs?

[mrsluvvaluvva]

Hi there

Felt compelled to ask this as just lately I have really been seeing men in a different light when in social settings. Perhaps I am just getting old and grumpy or reading something that isn't there.

I have been to a few parties recently and have been really conscious of men eyeing up very young almost tartily dressed teenagers. These girls were dressed very glamorously but waay too old for their age. I saw a couple of girls probably aged 16/17 and a couple over 18's, but not by much.

What I found worrying was middle aged men blatently eyeing them up and more worrying men in my group of friends/family. Men old enough to be their dad's. Not necessarily gawping but craftily staring when they could. Now I'm talking not just about a pretty girl but proper tarted up, hot pants the lot.

It made me feel quite sick to see middle aged men perving like this, so am I being unreasonable here to think even nice guys are secret pervs and although they may not be happy with their daughters dressed up like that, they will happily ogle others?

All men are pervs a bit of the time, a few men are pervs nearly all the time. Ditto women.

Sorted.

I am sorry but I really do not buy all this laughing and joking and saying that most of you are cool wlith this scenario!

So when a middle aged man is ogling a teenager he is doing it with concern or dismay at how she is dressed?oh are!as if.

I think its well creepy that men perv at young(much younger) women. Anyone that thinks its biology is crackers.
I do not believe for one second that many women would stand at a party and laugh it off while their dh and his friends leered at a child dresSed as a woman.

I like to think my DH isn't. I know that (even before I was with him) he turned down stag night trips to strip clubs because thy made him feel uncomfortable, and lost a friendship because the guy cheated on his wife.

However, I was a very physically mature 15 yr old and I was eyed up, leered over and propositioned by many a fully grown man....so...I am always suspicious, I'm afraid.

Its not cool. I find it absolutely disgusting in retrospect. If I thought my DH was leering over teenagers I would be appalled.

I can't think of any woman I know who would perv over a teenage boy. Do any of you fancy Justin Bieber? I doubt it. Yet I'm sure many men perv over girls his age. Grim.

Eyeing up and leering is one thing, propositioning is another, especially a 15 year old.

But teenage girls are in their reproductive prime. It's human nature for men to find it physically attractive.

I know plenty of women in their 30s who, maybe perv is the wrong word, but find Justin Bieber attractive. I find that more strange than men fancying Rihanna or other teenage girl popstars.

Agree with sayboo. And yes, grim.
$
Debbie, reproductive prime?come on. Odd comment

Why is it an odd comment? It's factually true.

Why are you called Carmen Electra btw?

I can't think of any woman I know who would perv over a teenage boy.

Oh come on.

My dad and his mates go down the pub and stare really obviously at the barmaids who are late teens early 20's. If i meet Dad for a drink he keeps trailing off mid sentence while staring and i say 'Dad stop staring' he always says he's not, or i'm just jealous

If we are in the car and he sees a woman (pretty much any woman) he slows and stares. I know how obvious and creepy it is because it happened to me from old lech's when i was young.

Mum just rolls her eyes. But i think it's really horrible for a 68 year old man. He's like a teenager, him and his mates swap porn sites to watch and whenever i log on my parents (actually mums work) computer to check MN my emails there is always gross porn all over it which he hasn't closed down properly.

Last week i had the embarrassing task of teaching mum how to clear the internet history.

However, DP is nothing like that and neither is any other man i know. Sad really.

Debbie, yes a 16 year old girl may be able to get pregnant, but hardly reprocuctive prime. In fact, just a high risk for miscarriage as an older woman at the end of her fertility . Reproductive prime would actually be more like early 20's.

And why am I called carmenelectra. Dunno. I like it. Why are you called. Debbie 78?

A 32 year old woman I work with went to see "The Wanted" with a group of friends last week. They aren't far off being teenagers are they? She was drooling about them for days afterwards.

Because my name's debbie and I was born in 1978.

" However, DP is nothing like that and neither is any other man i know. "

You and anyone who believes this are deluding yourselves.

Sorry pendeen but how do you know my DP is like my dad? I'm not saying he doesn't admire women. He does and often points them out to me. However, he does not trail off sentences and stare like an imbecile at a barmaid when i am out with him like my dad does when with my mum.

He also has fetishes and i know exactly what his (viewing and other) tastes are - They certainly do not involve young women!

Well the men were looking at them because they have a body of a woman not because they resembled children so pervs isn't really correct.

Actually Carmen women are in their reproductive prime in their mid to late teens.

And the firmest tits and arses, which is what the men are probably ogling.

And I don't believe that women don't ogle firm, lithe, young male bodies

There's a big difference between drooling over a popstar on a stage miles away from you, and actively leering/staring/drooling at someone's 15 year old daughter at a party. When 50 year olds leered after me aged 15 I thought they were insane, why on earth would I be interested in them (I wasn't wearing hot pants for their sake but for their 18 year old sons benefit).

It's the difference between a glance and openly staring, it's the difference between admiring someone or staring/talking at their breasts. If groups of fifty year old women stood about openly ogling their friend's 15 year old son, or talking to their crotch, I would be equally disparaging, but they don't for a whole set of power relations that people here don't seem to want to admit are going on.

Most women won't leer over a teenage boy is more likely because men are more attractive when they are actually fully-grown (early 20s), whereas girls have woman-shapes from about 15 onwards (earlier in some cases)

Most women won't leer over a teenage boy is more likely because men are more attractive when they are actually fully-grown (early 20s), whereas girls have woman-shapes from about 15 onwards (earlier in some cases)

I'd buy that one.

If groups of fifty year old women stood about openly ogling their friend's 15 year old son, or talking to their crotch, I would be equally disparaging, but they don't for a whole set of power relations that people here don't seem to want to admit are going on.

You have clearly never worked on a factory floor.....

Seems this thread has touched a real nerve with many women! Not sure what the answer is... I would hope that ywbu to think this but maybe it does apply to many, many men?

Yeah teenage girls are at prime in the fact that they can get pregnant, maintaining a pregnancy is something else.